Why does this fetish attract so many weirdos and intellectually challenged individuals?

[PreyToGod]

I know that’s a loaded title but I’ve been part of the ‘community’ for about 10 years on various sites and I can’t help but feel this way - there is such a disproportionate amount of folks who seem socially oblivious, obsessive, illiterate and or mentally challenged. 
 

It’s an unusual kink but I don’t see how that really effects anything. 

I’ve never been a part of any other kink community online though so maybe it’s par for the course.

And maybe the more reasonable folks are less likely to post and make their presence felt. 
 

Also maybe this is a pretty average cross section of the general population. 
 

Has anyone else noticed this? What do you make of it? 

[Guest Weight gain schadenfreude]

I think it's a combination of many things:

- Fetishes/kinks tend to disproportionally attract people who are autistic, obsessive and/or socially inept

- There is a certain degree of fetish "co-morbidity" so you will find a lot of people who also have other  weird kinks

- People who don't get any action tend to spend more time on kinky Internet sites

- People who are "unusual" are more likely to have "unusual" tastes

[Chazz]

I’m not sure if it’s this specific community and think it might just be something prominent across different fetish sites, and there are always those that take matters one step too far. 
With fetishes as well, as a species we crave creating bonds and basically wanting to be accepted and deviate from loneliness. Due to the nature of certain fetishes, they’re usually quite private, so finding people with similar interests to your own people is obviously quite challenging. This means that some individuals (not all) get fixated in fantasy land when they see pictures and videos, believing they’ve found someone to connect with , misinterpreting a profile with someone’s life and thinking they know someone on an intimate level. This in turn leads to obsession and if not careful lead to abuse and stalking (hence why a number of models have been scared off in the past). This behaviour is also prevalent with celebrities where they get stalked and maybe abused for specific job roles. 

[Lake Terror]

18 hours ago, PreyToGod said:

I know that’s a loaded title but I’ve been part of the ‘community’ for about 10 years on various sites and I can’t help but feel this way - there is such a disproportionate amount of folks who seem socially oblivious, obsessive, illiterate and or mentally challenged. 
 

It’s an unusual kink but I don’t see how that really effects anything. 

I’ve never been a part of any other kink community online though so maybe it’s par for the course.

And maybe the more reasonable folks are less likely to post and make their presence felt. 
 

Also maybe this is a pretty average cross section of the general population. 
 

Has anyone else noticed this? What do you make of it? 

I have no idea either. I'm more irritated with those who prey towards feedee's and when they can't court them they dox them.

You would think this is the same behavior with generic p**n but maybe it isn't?

[PreyToGod]

5 hours ago, Weight gain schadenfreude said:

I think it's a combination of many things:

- Fetishes/kinks tend to disproportionally attract people who are autistic, obsessive and/or socially inept

- There is a certain degree of fetish "co-morbidity" so you will find a lot of people who also have other  weird kinks

- People who don't get any action tend to spend more time on kinky Internet sites

- People who are "unusual" are more likely to have "unusual" tastes

Good points.

I was of them belief that actual fetishes developed in abstraction to one’s personality or even upbringing so it shouldnt be that general profile of people with a feedism kink is any different to the norm but maybe experiences and upbringing play more of a role in the development of a fetish than I realise, which has shaped their development in other ways.

And the community probably attracts people who don’t have a feedism fetish as such but they’re just sort of internet dwelling outcasts and deviants who think fat girls will be easy or enjoy the darker side of it or they feel at ease among the strangeness of it. Feebie definitely seems like a collection of people who would sit in the corner and scribble pictures of their classmates being killed by a man in an evil rabbit costume. 

Maybe it makes more sense than I thought though  

 

[PreyToGod]

1 hour ago, Lake Terror said:

I have no idea either. I'm more irritated with those who prey towards feedee's and when they can't court them they dox them.

You would think this is the same behavior with generic p**n but maybe it isn't?

Yeah there are already enough challenges engaging with this fetish - the social embarrassment and the way they’re treated by people esp friend and family who see them gain weight, the unhealthiness, the cost of food  - the last thing they need are losers threatening them and getting aggressive when they don’t give them the attention they think that they’re entitled to. 

[supermanicsoul]

I feel exactly the same way as you OP. The way I've always thought about the issue can be summed up with that old George Carlin quote, "Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that."

In other words, I think that in smaller communities like ours, it's easier to see these complete idiot weirdos because of how relatively few people there are in this community. But the truth is that these people are everywhere, all around us, all the time... *Shudder*.

Edited May 30, 2022 by supermanicsoul
Syntax

[extra_m13]

i have no idea... but , good topic for conversation!

[hiro]

Go hang around the feet guys for a while and come back and tell me how bad this "community" is.

[PhatCat]

How many people here are illiterate? I think a lot of people are just lazy with their writing on the internet. On the other hand, there are many great storytellers here. Some guys know how to write.

There are some people in this community who I fear have not-so-great motives when encouraging women to gain. I think some guys here want to be controlling over women, whether it's so they gain to humiliate them or so they gain to immobilize them. They take pleasure in seeing others destroy themselves. I don't think it's the majority of people, but I think some of this type do exist. There's something about men encouraging women to gain into morbid obesity that I find disturbing. If a woman is already obese and wants to feel great about herself, that's amazing. If a woman happens to gain some weight, that's hot too. The part of this community that encourages someone to destroy their health is where I have a problem. There's something mentally unhealthy about that too, both for the person who is gaining and the people who are encouraging them to gain.

On the other hand, this place should be a safe space for those who want to gain and enjoy seeing others gain.

[Guest Weight gain schadenfreude]

17 hours ago, PreyToGod said:

And the community probably attracts people who don’t have a feedism fetish as such but they’re just sort of internet dwelling outcasts and deviants who think fat girls will be easy

That's a fair point. I think SOME see fat girls as low hanging fruit. Like "That girl is told all the time she's fat and ugly. If I tell her she's a goddess she will be interested in me".

[extra_m13]

i think it is not the fetish or anything else, i think we are just a subsample and we have a bit of everything as well as in any other group. i am sure there are obsesive and manipulatuive guys asking ladies to stay fit or do this or that... 

[PhatCat]

18 hours ago, Weight gain schadenfreude said:

That's a fair point. I think SOME see fat girls as low hanging fruit. Like "That girl is told all the time she's fat and ugly. If I tell her she's a goddess she will be interested in me".

Some definitely see it this way, and some girls with low self esteem eat it up. I dated a few slightly chubby girls who gave me the impression that few other guys found them attractive. They were dying for some attention that guys never gave them. One girl had much higher self esteem after we had been together for a year. I was the first for her, but 7 years later she finally has someone else (I'm sure she waited by choice). I never dated these girls because they were easy, I dated them because I really liked them.

Another girl I know was chubby all her life, and since the pandemic has gotten quite fat. But she's always had her pick of guys, now more than ever. She has the right attitude to let guys know that she's not low hanging fruit. And that attitude gets her even more attention. She's a goddess and knows it. I think guys make fools of themselves thinking they're the only ones who tell her that.

My fiancee was one of those girls when she was younger who was really chubby and jiggly, and she'd show off her jiggle in string bikinis and belly shirts because she was oblivious to how chubby she was. She never had any shortage of attention, but she ate it all up.

[Lake Terror]

21 hours ago, extra_m13 said:

i think it is not the fetish or anything else, i think we are just a subsample and we have a bit of everything as well as in any other group. i am sure there are obsesive and manipulatuive guys asking ladies to stay fit or do this or that... 

Actually you're right on this. How much has society told women to stay a certain size, that if they get fat no guy would want them?

For half a century this has been promoted as OK!

So of course we would have it here. Any sort of weight loss these guys become so abusive it sickens me.

[Wendy CLIPS]

On 6/1/2022 at 4:46 AM, PhatCat said:

Some definitely see it this way, and some girls with low self esteem eat it up. I dated a few slightly chubby girls who gave me the impression that few other guys found them attractive. They were dying for some attention that guys never gave them. One girl had much higher self esteem after we had been together for a year. I was the first for her, but 7 years later she finally has someone else (I'm sure she waited by choice). I never dated these girls because they were easy, I dated them because I really liked them.

Another girl I know was chubby all her life, and since the pandemic has gotten quite fat. But she's always had her pick of guys, now more than ever. She has the right attitude to let guys know that she's not low hanging fruit. And that attitude gets her even more attention. She's a goddess and knows it. I think guys make fools of themselves thinking they're the only ones who tell her that.

My fiancee was one of those girls when she was younger who was really chubby and jiggly, and she'd show off her jiggle in string bikinis and belly shirts because she was oblivious to how chubby she was. She never had any shortage of attention, but she ate it all up.

honestly I hate the idea that a fat person is considered ugly and that there are guys who think that and want to pick up the ugly fat one more easily, I would rather be single for life than date one of them, fuck them

[Jorin85]

I think the worst thing about this fetish can also exist in IRL interactions and relationships. Closeted feeders who deliberately don't tell their partners (who don't have the fetish or even know about it) that they have these desires, and try to secretly make them gain without their knowledge. 

And guys who date women who are into it, but them dump them for simply not being big enough.

I have seen, over the years, so many women who it turns out were forced into this community in a bid to please their obsessive and manipulative boyfriends who were just using them for their own secret desires.

It's very sad. 

[Jorin85]

And also, online, it doesn't take much to follow the cues and the words that the model uses when she explains what she likes and doesn't like - what she is, and what she isn't.

but you still get guys telling girls to gain weight - even though they clearly state they are not gainers - and other examples. 

 

These are people who just see what they want to see and read what they want to read. They are oblivious to others feelings and wants in the face of their own base instincts.

[Lake Terror]

9 hours ago, Jorin85 said:

And also, online, it doesn't take much to follow the cues and the words that the model uses when she explains what she likes and doesn't like - what she is, and what she isn't.

but you still get guys telling girls to gain weight - even though they clearly state they are not gainers - and other examples. 

 

These are people who just see what they want to see and read what they want to read. They are oblivious to others feelings and wants in the face of their own base instincts.

I think part of it is oblivious the other is controlling behavior. I've seen that on this site and it's disappointing but it's also expected. It shouldn't be expected!

We need to find a way to make this community stop doing that because it is a community of acceptance of loving one self and their body. You see too many people leave this community out of fear that the person they're with or trying to get with is just abusive.

I remember specifically a video of a woman about 8 years ago. She started gaining weight because she caught her boyfriend sleeping with her mother who was over 300lbs. She thought she needs to be over 300lbs to win him back and that was just disgusting she thought this. All cause her boyfriend cheated on her. That's emotional abuse. 

I think it really comes down to calling out these individuals and telling them that this behavior is wrong because your actions impact all of us and we're not going to stand for that anymore.

[finallyfat]

21 hours ago, Lake Terror said:

"I remember specifically a video of a woman about 8 years ago. She started gaining weight because she caught her boyfriend sleeping with her mother who was over 300lbs. She thought she needs to be over 300lbs to win him back and that was just disgusting she thought this. All cause her boyfriend cheated on her. That's emotional abuse."

You believe that drama? 

Incels and the drama queens feeding them are the most visible weirdos here.


 

[Lake Terror]

2 minutes ago, finallyfat said:

You believe that drama? 

Incels and the drama queens feeding them are the most visible weirdos here.


 

I mean when she was trying to start modeling, yeah I fully believe this model.

She made like 2 more videos after that and then vanished completely.

 

Not supporting incels at all but I do believe only a few are here in this community. It's mostly people who can't communicate at all or ones who take full advantage of others.

[OscarWinner]

On 5/29/2022 at 2:16 PM, PreyToGod said:

I’ve never been a part of any other kink community online though so maybe it’s par for the course.

And maybe the more reasonable folks are less likely to post and make their presence felt. 
 

Also maybe this is a pretty average cross section of the general population. 

This, and..

On 5/30/2022 at 3:32 AM, Weight gain schadenfreude said:

I think it's a combination of many things:

- Fetishes/kinks tend to disproportionally attract people who are autistic, obsessive and/or socially inept

- People who don't get any action tend to spend more time on kinky Internet sites

..the combination of those two points. I truly believe that the internet is what attracts autistic, obsessive and socially inept people and whatever kink/fetish/preference they have they bring with them and connect over that. The second point on it's face by itself may be true for a time, but I'm sure after a while some will visit other sites in order to learn about real world success... only to then later be branded vile due to the socio-political ramifications of what else is allegedly taught on those other sites.

The "autistics" and the obsessed and the socially inept groups can overlap - some can fall within two or all three categories - but there's a great deal of difference between them and the way to handle them. I've had DM correspondence with some users who perfectly exemplify some of this. Even their "niceness" can get very annoying. Then, the recent Abyss topic about some guy and Candii Kayn was yet another example - my two cents on that: trolls that have been here for a cup of coffee should just be banned (we can't get your "humor" when we barely know you), however DMs would be the best way to diffuse a situation like that from the outset (I'll assume she did send one), and yes people really shouldn't just be assholes... oh, but what's that? We live in a real world where such a thing is inevitable everywhere. But yeah, even if it's just teasing, we should consider what Reddit did: a tag to say teasing is okay or not, or sometimes is and sometimes isn't - it would prevent some of this talk. Either way, Candii is way too good to even be bothered worrying about some nobody.

Generally speaking, yeah, they could be ignored - muting is a stronger way of doing this - or blocked or reported. But I'm sure these types of people can improve. It's a big part of why they come to a forum instead of just a fap site. Engaging with the models and other fans can help to humanize them in their minds.. to a degree. Even if it's just lies, hearing about her day, her day job, her friends, family and boyfriend will make these guys (and girls) understand "this is a person with feelings, dreams, goals, fears and hopes". Merely looking at sexy photos and watching videos just makes them into objects. You can't really know someone until you know them. 

In the grand scheme of things, this scene is no worse than any other and it's not just because the bar is lowering. For crying out loud, we got people in the mainstream defending groomers now.

[PreyToGod]

On 6/3/2022 at 5:17 PM, Jorin85 said:

I think the worst thing about this fetish can also exist in IRL interactions and relationships. Closeted feeders who deliberately don't tell their partners (who don't have the fetish or even know about it) that they have these desires, and try to secretly make them gain without their knowledge. 

And guys who date women who are into it, but them dump them for simply not being big enough.

I have seen, over the years, so many women who it turns out were forced into this community in a bid to please their obsessive and manipulative boyfriends who were just using them for their own secret desires.

It's very sad. 

Yeah and the issue is that drawing attention to this isn’t going to deter anyone who’s guilty of it, like anti sexual assault campaigns, they do it because they get off on the thought of fattening someone against their will otherwise they would just openly discuss it. Anyone who shows interest in that should almost be doxxed just so we can omit or them on any social media they have and let their girlfriend know what’s going on. 
 

I’d say about a quarter of all feedees I’ve seen have clearly been doing it to appease a partner and some seem to embrace it but most clearly don’t and I can’t believe that anyone would go to such lengths that they’re seriously changing their own body to please someone else, in a world full of other options… well I can for the same reason that domestic violence is so common and difficult to escape from  

 

And then the community starts giving them money if they sell content and adoration and it reinforces it then I assume they disappear one day because either they stood up against their manipulative partner and broke off with them, or family / friends / doctors comments got to them, or they got dumped because their boyfriend enjoys the early stages of weight gain.

 

I spoke to a ssbbw once and she had just been dumped by her partner - they met when she was chubby and over a few years he fed her until she was nearly immobile then left her for a smaller woman and she was left feeling like a big unlovable sack of shit

yeah it’s sad. 

[PreyToGod]

On 6/4/2022 at 2:36 AM, Lake Terror said:

I think part of it is oblivious the other is controlling behavior. I've seen that on this site and it's disappointing but it's also expected. It shouldn't be expected!

We need to find a way to make this community stop doing that because it is a community of acceptance of loving one self and their body. You see too many people leave this community out of fear that the person they're with or trying to get with is just abusive.

I remember specifically a video of a woman about 8 years ago. She started gaining weight because she caught her boyfriend sleeping with her mother who was over 300lbs. She thought she needs to be over 300lbs to win him back and that was just disgusting she thought this. All cause her boyfriend cheated on her. That's emotional abuse. 

I think it really comes down to calling out these individuals and telling them that this behavior is wrong because your actions impact all of us and we're not going to stand for that anymore.

I learned quite quickly that this isn’t a body positive community, nor is it really even a community so much as an omnium gatherum of individuals with somewhat similar kinks and fetishes that happen to imbricate with aspects of the broader body positivity movement.

For 90% of guys here bigger is better, and just because it runs contrariwise to the mainstream beauty paradigm doesn’t mean it’s any more virtuous than holding the more common view that thinner is better.

Many will claim they’re in support of weight loss or maintenance in the service of being healthier but we know that deeper down they’re hoping the diet fails or they decide to gain again - it’s their fetish after all. 
 

I’ve also seen thin and conventionally attractive women being instantly shunned as gold diggers who are just trying to fleece people, or being criticised for their appearance as though their self esteem should be bulletproof since society considers them attractive - nothing body positive about that. 
 

Much of the weight gain encouragement is also predicated on the notion that they are not enough as they are - If only they gained another 100lbs they would be beautiful, then if they gained a further 100lbs they would be a goddess, even though they’ve stated that they’re only interested in gaining a few pounds. I speak as someone who doesn’t have the weight gain kink as such, but the obsessing over the numbers has always struck me as absurd even as a fetish. Again, even if this is considered sexy and requested by the gainer, it’s still the antithesis of body acceptance. 
 

There’s also a great swathe of the “community” who flatly ignore the preferences and conditions laid out by the models and just foist their own desires onto everyone else. In their twisted world a young girl who’s tentatively experimenting with gaining a few pounds after overcoming anorexia is on the same page as someone who’s aiming to become an immobile blob. Or they assume that everyone is wanting to be brutally insulted and called a fat worthless fuck pig. In many cases it’s disrespectful but in some cases I think it’s just a testament to obliviousness and social ineptitude that abounds. 

 

Many of the models who drop in frankly need to talk to a psychologist rather than a den of horny strangers on the internet who are thinking with their dicks and not their heart. For years I made it a point to privately messaged many newcomers over the years to give them a heads up about what they can expect to hopefully make their experience positive and insulate against the darker side - that would sometimes draw out their backstory and half the time I would encourage them to leave because it was obvious that they had joined for the wrong reasons and they were in two minds about it from day one. 
 

To join a fetish “community” under the naive assumption that it’s a supportive place only to be bombarded with disrespectful requests and superficial flattery and to realise that very few people really care about anyones wellbeing has to be crushing, and I’ve seen many people realise the hard way. 

A few years ago a girl I had been speaking with sent me a screenshot of a formally written message she had received from a man. He was making her an offer - he would cover the medical bills with an additional ten thousand dollars if she became so obese that she needed to be hospitalised, and was able to provide evidence. He includes that he was a wealthy businessman and included a most likely doctored photo of his bank balance to prove that he had money. At that point she was so shaken that she removed all of her content and told me she was leaving - which she did - and it was unfortunate because she was a lovely person and she genuinely had a passion for the kink. It was the straw which broke the camels back though, as she had already received her share of abusive messages. I messaged the man and told him that I’d transfer ten thousand dollars into his account if he leapt from the roof of his nearest high rise building, but only once I had evidence that he had gone through with it. He actually replied something to the effect “this is a porn site, stop trying to be a hero”. 

In another instance, a beautiful soul who I had been talking with for a year or so and was planning to meet at some point abruptly sends me a farewell message stating that she was being blackmailed by a spineless scumbag who had doxed her (I’m pretty certain he was able to identify her with something in the background of a photo she had taken in her bedroom) and he threatened to send her fetish content to her friends and family lest she comply with  his demands. I only just saw it in time before she disappeared from the internet and social media and as far as I can tell she hasn’t reappeared or if she has she’s made herself unsearchable. It’s hard to imagine how panicked she must have been all because a sick fuck felt entitled to her.

So the root issue is that some people have divorced their (already lacking) morals and ethics from their sexuality, which alongside the relative anonymity of the online sphere, ultimately gives them free reign to be as callous and predatory as they like, as though they’re interacting with sex bots not real humans - it occurs on dating apps to a lesser extent. I still don’t see how they can live with themselves but I suppose some sociopathic types have a mindset of sexual self gratification regardless of the impact on others, although I would argue the examples above (and death feedism) are closer aligned with sadism. 

 

It’s challenging enough to manage the social stigma and negative reactions from family and friends, and the physical difficulties and health relate issues inevitably incurred by weight gain and overeating, these heartless gutless degenerates just make it even harder. It’s really no mystery why most vanish from the “community” without a word, I just hope their circumstances aren’t as direful as the those I’ve mentioned. 
 

I’m not sure what the solution is, besides condemning it publicly, educating people on signs of manipulation and encouraging them to report any messages which cause them to feel uneasy and IP banning anyone who’s found to be disrespectful or abusive. A gentler approach of trying to edify and encourage the wrongdoers to take more responsibility over their words and actions may work in some milder cases who have enough empathy. Call me a cynic but I think most of the worst offenders are too far gone. 

[PreyToGod]

That might be the longest thing I’ve ever written 

[Jorin85]

6 hours ago, PreyToGod said:

I learned quite quickly that this isn’t a body positive community, nor is it really even a community so much as an omnium gatherum of individuals with somewhat similar kinks and fetishes that happen to imbricate with aspects of the broader body positivity movement.

For 90% of guys here bigger is better, and just because it runs contrariwise to the mainstream beauty paradigm doesn’t mean it’s any more virtuous than holding the more common view that thinner is better.

Many will claim they’re in support of weight loss or maintenance in the service of being healthier but we know that deeper down they’re hoping the diet fails or they decide to gain again - it’s their fetish after all. 
 

I’ve also seen thin and conventionally attractive women being instantly shunned as gold diggers who are just trying to fleece people, or being criticised for their appearance as though their self esteem should be bulletproof since society considers them attractive - nothing body positive about that. 
 

Much of the weight gain encouragement is also predicated on the notion that they are not enough as they are - If only they gained another 100lbs they would be beautiful, then if they gained a further 100lbs they would be a goddess, even though they’ve stated that they’re only interested in gaining a few pounds. I speak as someone who doesn’t have the weight gain kink as such, but the obsessing over the numbers has always struck me as absurd even as a fetish. Again, even if this is considered sexy and requested by the gainer, it’s still the antithesis of body acceptance. 
 

There’s also a great swathe of the “community” who flatly ignore the preferences and conditions laid out by the models and just foist their own desires onto everyone else. In their twisted world a young girl who’s tentatively experimenting with gaining a few pounds after overcoming anorexia is on the same page as someone who’s aiming to become an immobile blob. Or they assume that everyone is wanting to be brutally insulted and called a fat worthless fuck pig. In many cases it’s disrespectful but in some cases I think it’s just a testament to obliviousness and social ineptitude that abounds. 

 

Many of the models who drop in frankly need to talk to a psychologist rather than a den of horny strangers on the internet who are thinking with their dicks and not their heart. For years I made it a point to privately messaged many newcomers over the years to give them a heads up about what they can expect to hopefully make their experience positive and insulate against the darker side - that would sometimes draw out their backstory and half the time I would encourage them to leave because it was obvious that they had joined for the wrong reasons and they were in two minds about it from day one. 
 

To join a fetish “community” under the naive assumption that it’s a supportive place only to be bombarded with disrespectful requests and superficial flattery and to realise that very few people really care about anyones wellbeing has to be crushing, and I’ve seen many people realise the hard way. 

A few years ago a girl I had been speaking with sent me a screenshot of a formally written message she had received from a man. He was making her an offer - he would cover the medical bills with an additional ten thousand dollars if she became so obese that she needed to be hospitalised, and was able to provide evidence. He includes that he was a wealthy businessman and included a most likely doctored photo of his bank balance to prove that he had money. At that point she was so shaken that she removed all of her content and told me she was leaving - which she did - and it was unfortunate because she was a lovely person and she genuinely had a passion for the kink. It was the straw which broke the camels back though, as she had already received her share of abusive messages. I messaged the man and told him that I’d transfer ten thousand dollars into his account if he leapt from the roof of his nearest high rise building, but only once I had evidence that he had gone through with it. He actually replied something to the effect “this is a porn site, stop trying to be a hero”. 

In another instance, a beautiful soul who I had been talking with for a year or so and was planning to meet at some point abruptly sends me a farewell message stating that she was being blackmailed by a spineless scumbag who had doxed her (I’m pretty certain he was able to identify her with something in the background of a photo she had taken in her bedroom) and he threatened to send her fetish content to her friends and family lest she comply with  his demands. I only just saw it in time before she disappeared from the internet and social media and as far as I can tell she hasn’t reappeared or if she has she’s made herself unsearchable. It’s hard to imagine how panicked she must have been all because a sick fuck felt entitled to her.

So the root issue is that some people have divorced their (already lacking) morals and ethics from their sexuality, which alongside the relative anonymity of the online sphere, ultimately gives them free reign to be as callous and predatory as they like, as though they’re interacting with sex bots not real humans - it occurs on dating apps to a lesser extent. I still don’t see how they can live with themselves but I suppose some sociopathic types have a mindset of sexual self gratification regardless of the impact on others, although I would argue the examples above (and death feedism) are closer aligned with sadism. 

 

It’s challenging enough to manage the social stigma and negative reactions from family and friends, and the physical difficulties and health relate issues inevitably incurred by weight gain and overeating, these heartless gutless degenerates just make it even harder. It’s really no mystery why most vanish from the “community” without a word, I just hope their circumstances aren’t as direful as the those I’ve mentioned. 
 

I’m not sure what the solution is, besides condemning it publicly, educating people on signs of manipulation and encouraging them to report any messages which cause them to feel uneasy and IP banning anyone who’s found to be disrespectful or abusive. A gentler approach of trying to edify and encourage the wrongdoers to take more responsibility over their words and actions may work in some milder cases who have enough empathy. Call me a cynic but I think most of the worst offenders are too far gone. 

I think this is a subset of internet culture in general - where the consumers of peoples content believe they also have ownership of it. They have this weird attitude that they can make demands and that sending them money or gifts entitles them to special treatment. It also does happen in IRL human interactions. You think you have an actual friend and supportive person in your life, then you say that you want to do things differently, and they start to treat you like sh*t. I had that when I decided to stop drinking. Suddenly, they weren't my friends, they were just people saying ''why don't you go out anymore'', ''you're so funny when you're **!'' 

I am not comparing situations, I am just saying that this problem is true of all internet and IRL social communities;. You think you have met people who respect you fully and appreciate you for what you do - but they really don't. They only like the part of you that brings out a form of pleasure and entertainment in THEM! And if you no longer do things that resonate with them - they get bitter and twisted and angry at you.

Then they come back a while later claiming to ''miss you'' and ''wish you the best'' - but it is a manipulation tactic to get you to go back to them. 

Basically, what I am saying, is that this is a problem across all aspects of 'communities'' that you find online and IRL. 

The best you can do is try to be vigilent and try to learn from the negatives that you experience with those people.