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Milf Avenue

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8 hours ago, Batman76 said:

Lol, how big is chloe butt right now?

Very short entry to answer this important question. 

 

Chapter 9: California Feeding (part 5)

 

Ping. Zzzjjripp.

“Aw, snap!” Chloe yelped, and grabbed at her jeans. The button was nowhere to be felt, and almost certainly was bouncing downhill in the vague direction of Santa Monica Boulevard, never to be found again. The zipper had bust impressively, too.

“Dammit, Chloe! You knew you were gonna need to upsize your 16’s for this vacation! Now you have to buy some at Hollywood prices.” Chloe admonished herself.

Chloe’s short walk from leafy Mill Avenue had brought her to a bustling new commercial plaza, where Lara van Floofenheim’s favourite fancy donut shop vied for space with upmarket eateries, an expensive chocolatier with a weird logo, a Cheesecake Factory, and, fortunately, a clothing boutique. The sales lady in the boutique eventually condescended to sell Chloe a pair of stretchy white leggings, which she wore out of the store – but not before offering the blonde a lecture on her need to lose a few dress sizes (apparently, to the eye of an elite salesperson, the 45+ inch bulk of Chloe’s hips, on such a young woman, was simply shocking), and a recommendation for an all-liquid diet that would help her to achieve this.

“All liquid diet?” Chloe asked and arched an eyebrow. “What, like milk? I lurve milk!”

“No!” Corrected the sales lady. “Dairy is not allowed at all! Fermented cow juice has been the downfall of many young actresses’ figures in this town!”

“Oh.” Chloe feigned surprise. “Then I could never do that diet. I drink at least two gallons of full fat milk every day – more when I get to go out for milkshakes, which is most days, actually – and I also love milkshakes made with at least half heavy cream... In fact, I love to chug heavy cream from the carton. But my boyfriend doesn’t let me do it in public as often as I’d like. Still, I have curves to maintain, and it’s one of the best ways, so I usually chug some before my bedtime peanut butter feed!”

Chloe patted her hips to emphasise their freight-train stopping solidity.

The thin sales lady looked scandalised. “Are you one of these B.B.W. porn actresses?” She demanded.

“Only for my boyfriend.” Chloe replied smugly. “Though I think I have potential! Thanks for the leggings and the chat!”

Chloe departed the boutique, satisfied that she’d won a small victory for curvy girls who didn’t like the sound of a milk-free liquid diet. Her smugness was slightly ruined by the Jurassic rumbling of her belly as she reached the exit: talk of milk and cream had made Chloe hungry.

In the plaza, Chloe’s heart sank as she saw a heavy crowd of customers now thronging around the donut store. Her tummy rumbled volubly again. Chloe put her hands down to quiet it, lest the noise attract the attention of the plaza-goers.

“Shush! I fed you so fucking much today. Be quiet!”

Chloe’s tummy persisted in gurgling hungrily as she waited her turn to buy four dozen assorted artisanal donuts. She looked round to see if there was a Krispy Kreme or some alternative donut place – but there wasn’t, and the other food boutiques on the plaza were as crammed as Delightful Donuts. In fact, the chocolatier was being absolutely mobbed by customers with no patience for forming an orderly line. Which was surprising, because they looked pretty rich – they’d have to be to shop at a store with its own modern art sculpture for a sign.

“Ug! How can you be this hungry, Chloe? It’s not like... oh. No way!”

Chloe had been staring at the disorderly press around Sarnath Chocolates. An irregular flow of patrons in upscale clothes emerged clutching their shopping to their chests, as their other patrons snatched hungrily at their boxed goodies. It was fucking weird... And the chocolate boxes causing all the envy were identical to the one Mrs von Fluffyboobs had so snapped at Chloe for admiring.

Chloe felt a thrill of excitement. “It’s gotta be an evil magic chocolate shop!” She gasped to herself.

Tceted Cigam!” Chloe incanted. “What, no magic? No way! Huh.”

The blonde felt a blow of disappointment. No glowing magical aura was anywhere to be seen! Not the chocolate boxes, nor the shop. Nor even the great big metal sculpted shop sign which might as well have “evil magic rune” stamped on the side.

“Can I help you, Miss?”

“What?” Chloe asked, before realising it was her turn for donuts. “YES! Donuts!”

The sales boy – Hollywood cute, perhaps an aspiring leading actor – smiled dazzlingly.

“Um.” Chloe explained, reading the cute boy’s name badge. “I would like four dozens of your assorted artisan donuts, please, um, Cris.”

“Great choice, Mam! Oh, top tip: if you’re buying for a party, our donuts are huge, and they go way farther if you cut them up.”

“Oh. Thanks, Cris. I have a feeling we’ll be seeing more each other... I’m Chloe, and actually these are just for me and my girlfriend.”

Cris continued to smile and held the look of doubt and confusion off his face almost entirely. Definitely an aspiring actor. Not bad.

“Oh, well, I hope you and your friend enjoy them very much, Chloe.”

“Thank you!” Chloe enthused, while trying not to drool too much over the large, complex pastries called “artisan donuts” that she would soon get to devour!

“You’re welcome, Chloe. Is there anything else I can get you?”

“Um.” Chloe smiled shyly. “Your phone number, maybe?”

A few minutes later, Chloe smiled smugly to herself as she strode back up to Mill Avenue, bearing four carefully-held boxes of donuts, a couple of gallons of milk, and a cute actor’s personal number.

 

*

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Forty-five inches? That’s no joke! How did that much mass sneak up on Chloe like that 😂 

It’s rare to see a proactive heroine gaining weight with full confidence in what she’s doing without being extra horny about it (Chloe is only a little bit kinky haha) This is why I love reading about Chloe so much

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Hi all,  American Christmas food question for your collective brains, if one or more of you would be so good.

What snacks would Chloe love to gorge on (and be admonished by her stepmom for enjoying too many of them) at a family Christmas? I nearly wrote a scene where she likes mince pies, but I think that would not make sense as she's not British. Chloe is an all-American girl from LA, with half of the family from New England. Obviously, she loves food of all kinds, especially dairy and cheesecake, and donuts, but what kind of small-ish snacks would be served as a stack on a plate, intended for several guests, but Chloe would dream of having her own huge stack of them?

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17 minutes ago, flyer33 said:

Hi all,  American Christmas food question for your collective brains, if one or more of you would be so good.

What snacks would Chloe love to gorge on (and be admonished by her stepmom for enjoying too many of them) at a family Christmas? I nearly wrote a scene where she likes mince pies, but I think that would not make sense as she's not British. Chloe is an all-American girl from LA, with half of the family from New England. Obviously, she loves food of all kinds, especially dairy and cheesecake, and donuts, but what kind of small-ish snacks would be served as a stack on a plate, intended for several guests, but Chloe would dream of having her own huge stack of them?

Hmmm, traditional thanksgiving fare is:

Turkey

Ham

mashed potatoes with gravy

Yams, so sweet potatoes with butter and marshmallows,

stuffing/dressing

Pumpkin pie.

 

So for a fancy party with small snack plates (and one where every female guest is hurtling towards obesity) we'll say, a turkey drum stick (which are massive), ham and cheese on tooth picks for ourderves, maybe some stuffed mushrooms or fried sweet potatoe fries, some twice baked mashed potatoes and pumpkin pies for desert.

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On 12/23/2020 at 4:47 AM, >_< 0_0 said:

Forty-five inches? That’s no joke! How did that much mass sneak up on Chloe like that 😂 

It’s rare to see a proactive heroine gaining weight with full confidence in what she’s doing without being extra horny about it (Chloe is only a little bit kinky haha) This is why I love reading about Chloe so much

Aw, Chloe likes compliments! 

When did it "sneak" up on her? Hmm, Check Best Served Wet, start of Book 2, chapter9 part 1 (I think). Chloe got hooked on powerlifting over her summer at the end of her Freshman year - partly she's a natural athlete; partly she's competitive, though she' so strong she has to compete against boys at weightlifting, because swimming was getting a bit to easy... And partly she likes the excuse to gorge on peanut butter and milkshake; and partly she discovered her boyfriend fucks her harder the curvier she gets, and she's kinky about making him fuck her super hard; and also using strength spells (which she uses for aerobics training to burn cheesecake faster so she can eat more..) has the side effect of causing her to pack on muscle fast; plus she then eats more cheesecake for those  boyfriend-pleasing curves... Overall result: she's just burst a size 16 pair of jeans, and she's not really used to the width of her ass anymore.

Best Served Wet - Page 5 - Your Stories - Curvage

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Happy Boxing Day, everyone!

 

Chapter 9: California Feeding (part 6)

 

In the gleaming, spotlit kitchen of the spacious new van Floofenheim mansion, Lara van Floofenheim was deep into a hot-tempered argument with her stepmom.

“Mom! I said you could have a little of my lasagna, not all of it!” Lara yelled in frustration.

Mrs Monica van Floofenheim, although feeling sick to her stomach from eating far too much chocolate already, and then packing away a colossal dish of rich lasagna in fifteen minutes flat, was in no mood to listen to a call for restraint from her gluttonous stepdaughter of all people. She saw Lara make a lunge for the almost-empty serving dish on the table between them, which Monica had nearly finished, and snatched it back before the overfed princess could reach.

Mom!” Lara screamed. “That lasagna was supposed to be for me and Chloe! What am I supposed to tell her? She's my friend, and now she's gonna think I don't care if she starves!”

Monica put a hand to her swollen, aching stomach.

“Oooh!” Groaned Mrs van Floofenheim. “Belly ache!”

“Huh.” Sulked Lara. “That's probably because you're lactose intolerant, Mom, and you just ate the whole of a lasagna meant for two growing girls!”

“Not all of it!” Snapped Monica, which was technically true as there were a few spoonfuls left. Certainly not what Lara would call a portion, though. “And, as for growing --- OOH! My Tummy! Urgh --- As for growing, Ms Floofenheim, if that blonde monster does any more growing, she'll break furniture! She's the size of an ox, and she's all boobs and thighs! I'm sure I don't know how you expect me to believe she's an athlete.”

“Mmm.” Lara mused. “Those thighs are as hard as truck tires, Mom... Well, apart from a little fluff in the right places. And trust me, Chloe's more than strong enough to carry the boobs and still swim for California!”

Monica directed a sour look at her stepdaughter. How Lara could be in a position to comment on the hardness of Ms Southern's thighs was not topic Mrs van Floofenheim would wish the neighbourhood to discuss. But perhaps it was because they'd gone swimming together or something, while Monica had been at afternoon tea at Sophie's, or after when she'd popped to the shops for ahem three boxes of irresistible Sarnath Chocolates. Hmm. Yes, that seemed likely.

“Be that as it may, Lara. Neither Chloe Southern nor certainly you are at any risk of starving from having one light dinner!”

“It's not fair, Mom! I asked the maid to make that lasagna specially for Chloe and me! And you asked me if you could have a little – and I thought you only meant a few forkfuls, because I know cheese upsets your tummy.”

Monica's already nauseated face turned a little greener at the reminder of the vast weight of cheese she'd just devoured from Lara's “special” lasagna.

“Urgh... BURRRP! Oh, I feel sick!”

“Well it serves you right, Mom!”

Monica groaned. “Oooh!” She was painfully stuffed.

“Huh. You're not going to get any sympathy, Mom. I'm hungry, and now I have to cook something for Chloe! She'll be back soon, and promised her a delicious dinner.”

Monica groaned again, this time more loudly, and with a hint of agony.

“You knew cheese gives you gas, Mom...”

“Urrh! Oof! Aaargh!” Mrs Floofenheim's moans became suddenly urgent. “Help! Lara!”

Lara planted her fists on hips sceptically.

“What do you want, Mom?”

From her chair with the ravaged lasagna dish and chocolate boxes before her, Monica moaned loudly. “Oh! Tummy hurts!”

“So, what? Do you want an alka seltzer?” Lara inquired.

Monica burped an affirmative. “Ye – URP – yes! Selzer!” She burped. “But first, help me up! My belly is cramping in this chair!”

Lara sighed. She didn't need to ask, “And you're too bloated to stand up on your own?” Because Monica was clearly so stuffed from eating almost every bit of Lara's and Chloe's food that the answer was yes.

Lara van Floofenheim's muscles were out of condition after eighteen months of very lax gym attendance – but she still had a fair amount of her former athletic strength left. Therefore, once she sighed theatrically at having to help her bloated stepmom stand up, and put her back into it, she soon wrested Monica to her feet.

Infelicitously, the strain of standing up put such a burden on Monica's cheese-bloated guts that she immediately let rip a torrent of titanic farts! And at the exact moment that her blonde guest, Chloe Southern, let herself in through the mansion's front door – using her ass to push the door open since her hands were occupied carrying donut boxes and milk.

“Hey! Anyone home? Lara? Mrs van Floofenheim?”

FAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAART! Parp, parp, parp, parp, parp, parp, parp!” Came the reply.

“Hahahaha. Uh, haha. Lol.” Chloe started to sob with laughter.

“Was that you, Lara?” The blonde called into the kitchen.

“NO!”

Chloe laughed her way into the kitchen.

“Who was it then, Lara? Some stinky boyfriend? Heh --- Oh, fuck!”

Chloe froze, as she looked up and caught the icy glare in her direction from the gassy, belching, farting, and so-bloated-she-looked-pregnant Mrs Monica van Floofenheim. And Chloe had already gotten off on the wrong foot with her...

“Oh. Hey, Mrs van Fluffenheim. Nice to see you again!”

Monica glared. “Floofen--- BUUURRRRRP!” Faaarrt! Monica glared angrily as her grossly gassy guts cut off her correction of Chloe's carefree use of freestyle surnames

Chloe didn't know what to say, but luckily Lara did.

“Hey Chloe. Mom ate our entire lasagna, even though she'd cheese-intolerant, and I had it specially made for us with super-extra cheese.”

Monica looked pissed at having her stepdaughter berate her in front of someone she hardly knew – but Monica was also too absorbed by clutching her belly and moaning to do anything about it.

“Oh, my belly! Feels like I'm gonna burst!” Monica squealed between burps.

Certainly, Monica's poor belly did look horribly distended. It was swelling up by the moment as she leant against the countertop for support. It bulged out as far as her huge silicone boobs! Which, Lara reflected, it surely hadn't done a little while earlier. Her red dress strained and rode up inelegantly because of Monica's churning pumpkin of a belly.

“Um. I've got some milk, if that would help?” Chloe offered. “It always helps my tummy if I ever eat too much... Maybe with some honey?”

Monica responded with a groan so loud it nearly shook the curtains, followed by a fart that really did.

“No! I'm lactose intolerant, you dumb blonde!”

“Oh!” Chloe replied. “Lara just said you were cheese-intolerant, so I thought maybe milk might help.”

“BUUURP! You thought wrong!” Monica yelled.

“Oh. Sorry, Mrs van F.” Chloe looked dejected.

“Not your fault, Chloe.” Said Lara, reaching into a cupboard for a pack of Alka Seltzer. “And Mom'll be fine. She just needs one of these and a lie down. Then I'll make us pasta. Then we can have donuts!”

Talk of donuts seemed to perk up the groaning Mrs Monica van Floofenheim. “Donuts? Give me one, Chloe!”

“I think you've had quite enough, Mom!” Lara replied sternly. “Drink this, then I'll help you to the restroom. And no donuts for you!”

“I want donuts! Burp!” Monica demanded.

Chloe and Lara glanced at each other.

“Nope.” The blonde and the heiress replied simultaneously.


 

* *

Later that evening...

“So, that was really weird with my Mom, earlier.” Said Lara.

Ms van Floofenheim said it kind of dreamily, because she was blissfully well fed and well sexed, so that thinking was hard. She'd made plain pasta and sauce for herself and Chloe, and she'd made so much that, afterwards, in Lara's bedroom, they had barely able to forcefeed each other their two dozen artisan donuts each. In fact, Chloe hadn't even finished her gallon of milk, she'd been so stuffed. Of course, Lara had still finished her own gallon of chocolate milk. And then they'd made out, and fucked, and Lara had got to indulge her fantasy of being squeezed between Chloe's thighs.

“Mmm.” Chloe confirmed. “Is Okay. Parents are embarrassing. At least your stepmom cooks for you!”

“Meh.” Lara snatched an opportunity for a deep kiss. “Mmm! Nice... Um, could you squeeze me harder, Chloe?”

“Oh, sure!”

Chloe had pinned Lara between her thighs. Lara was out of shape, and fleshy everywhere, and wrestling her hadn't been a challenge for the taller and much stronger Chloe. Lara had then begged Chloe to crush her until it hurt, which Chloe had obliged until Lara had seemed tired.

Chloe retightened her scissor grip on Lara's soft body.

“Oh, too much! Stop, please!” Lara squealed.

“Oh, too much now?” Chloe inquired without relaxing her legs.

“Yes, too much! I'm too fat and out of shape to endure this, Chloe!” Lara moaned, with more than a hint of arousal.

“Then you shouldn't have let me feed you twenty-four giant donuts, Ms Fluffystein! They will go straight to your fat tummy and bottom, and your large breasts, and make you even fatter!”

“Oh! I couldn't help it, Chloe! I'm such a greedy pig! Oh! Stop, stop! Enough!”

Lara shuddered like she'd orgasmed – again – and Chloe obligingly rolled off of the unfit, Greek girl to let her breathe. She lay panting for a while. Chloe decided to talk, since Lara was clearly too out of breath to.

“So, about your stepmom. While I was out buying donuts, I noticed this weird chocolate shop on the plaza, selling the exact same chocolates she was eating earlier. And the people buying them – all rich Beverly Hills types - looked they were pretty close to rioting, like something had made them violently addicted to chocolate all of a sudden.”

“Uh huh.” Lara groaned tiredly.

“And, here's my theory, Lara.” Chloe continued. “I think the chocolates this place is selling must contain some sort of mind-altering ingredient that makes these people super-gluttons. I know that sort of thing exists, because, um...”

“Because what, Chloe?” Lara asked. Chloe pondered how much to tell her friend.

“Um, my family in New England used to have lots of witches. Um, if you believe the stories...” Chloe settled on that explanation, rather than the one involving her first-hand experience of Fat Magic from last year. “And they have a secret recipe for pumpkin spice that makes you super-hungry.”

Lara's interest perked up.

“Really, Chloe? We should get some! Then we can eat more!”

No, Lara! My point is, I think these Sarnath Chocolates might use some ingredient like that, which might be why your stepmom stuffed herself sick today... And wouldn't give up the lasagna, even though she was stuffed.”

“Go to sleep, Chloe.” Lara instructed. “You have way too active an imagination! I think Mom just got jealous of our food, and pigged out, and couldn't stop herself because cheese is so good.”

Chloe was sleepy, so, although she wasn't convinced by her friend, she soon drifted to sleep in her arms...


 

*

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Chapter 9: California Feeding (part 7)

 

Lara van Floofenheim stirred within her vast bed, and yawned happily at the fading memory of a dream in which a muscular swim team captain had been making her eat cheesecake while fucking her senseless.

A figure emerged from Lara's ensuite shower: Chloe Southern, wearing a towel around her waist, and damp with water – apparently cold water, from the hardness of her nipples, which pointed firmly skywards from her mammoth, impossibly perky boobs. Hmm. Chloe Southern might not be the buff 6'2'' young man of Lara's dream, although she was at least as tall, actually more muscular and probably a lot stronger, and definitely hot enough to turn Lara bisexual, had she not been already. Oh, and also, Chloe Southern was insanely good in bed. Lara planned to beg the blonde to reveal where she'd learned her bedroom skills – there was no way it was from a few college boyfriends, no matter how hot they might be...

“Good morning, Ms van Fluffyheim.” Chloe said, while pilfering an XL T-shirt from Lara's dresser and proceeding to wear it as something like a crop top. “Did you sleep well, through all that racket last night?”

“Mmm.. I had nice dreams, thanks to you. What racket? And, Chloe: have you just taken a cold shower after exercising?

“Um, yes, obviously.” Chloe replied.

Lara pouted as severely as she could manage from within a fluffy duvet.

“Chloe! No! Bad Chloe! You'll get thin if you exercise, and lose your gorgeous curves! How could you do this to me?”

Chloe patted her friend on a plump shoulder. “I don't think you need to worry about me getting thin, Lara! Not after buying me two hundred dollars of lunch, and all those donuts you forced into me last night. Besides, it was just a quick 90 minute session in your Mom's weight room. You know weights, right, Lara? They're what you use when your girlfriend wants to be squished between your thighs. And you did like that, didn't you, Laracakes?”

Lara tried to resist agreeing, but she couldn't, because she wanted to be squished again, and soon. “Yes, but you squish too hard, Chloe!”

“You liked it. Plus, I was very gentle with you, because you, Ms Fluffyheim, are soft like a feather pillow. My boyfriend, on the other hand, I have to squish twenty times as hard.” Chloe rummaged some more through Lara's dresser. “Lara, you don't happen to have any cute shorts that would fit me? Say, maybe size eighteen?”

“Lol, no, Chloe! My fat bottom and thighs aren't nearly that fat! How about some nice yoga pants? Bottom drawer.”

“Thanks, Ms van Fluffyheim! Yoga pants will do just fine...” Chloe rummaged further. “Lara! Even your yoga pants are from some designer boutique! I'm not sure I'm fashionable enough to wear them!”

“I think.” Lara said. “After last night I'm giving you a hall pass to wear my rich-girl yoga pants any morning after you come to bed with me. Seriously, Chloe, where did you learn all your tricks? You are officially a better lover than any of my boyfriends! And that's a lot of prime American beef we're talking about!”

Chloe smirked. “Oh, you know, Lara. Well, apart from the fact that I've had my share of boyfriends and I'm a quick learner, I admit I picked up a lot from a book I inherited from an Aunt – you know I said my New England family are witches, right? Well, you'd guess sex magic is a thing, right?”

Lara ran this claim through her head.

“Are you serious?”

“Yeah, I'm-” Chloe started answering, before a great clanging sound interrupted from the Avenue outside. “What the fuck's that?”

Lara groaned, and got out of bed. She dragged the duvet with her.

Outside the window, some crazy man was ringing a big hand bell. And shouting.

“I think that's one of our neighbours.” Lara murmured to Chloe as they watched the scene of Mill Avenue's most eccentric resident accosting a passerby and trying to knock the box of glazed donuts out of her hand. While almost naked...

“Yeah he is.” Chloe confirmed. “Name's Eris. He's into witchcraft too, by the way.”

“Is he the fairly-cute guy from Number 12.”

“Yep.” Chloe confirmed.

“You know him?”

“We've met. I've had dinner at his place. And breakfast. Oh, so much breakfast. Very fattening. You'd love him, Ms Fluffyheim...”

“Really. So did you know he was crazy?”

Chloe looked down into the street. Mill Avenue's resident warlock had, for reasons unknown, emerged into the winter morning wearing nothing but his boxer shorts, and carrying a bell, which he was shaking madly, while shouting “The End is Nigh!” And generally making a nuisance of himself.

“Um. Not that crazy, I admit.” Chloe replied.

Lara sighed.

“You're gonna go down and talk to him, aren't you, Chloe?”

“Yep.”

“Fuck. I wanted you to go down on me again, Ms Southern!”

“Later! Good deeds helping out your crazy neighbour first!” Chloe said with determination, and headed downstairs in Lara's clothes.

 

*

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Chapter 9: California Feeding (part 😎

 

“Repent! Repent, Fatties! Put down those donuts, Sir!”

A passer-by carrying a coffee and mid-morning snack hastily crossed Mill Avenue to avoid the semi-naked eccentric with a bell who was making a nuisance of himself to the neighbourhood in general and pedestrians in particular. Chloe Southern, on the other hand, walked up behind him.

“Boo.” Said Chloe.

“Argh!” Cried Eris in panic.

Chloe blew out her cheeks.

“Hey Eris. What's got into you? Telling fatties to repent? You lurve curvy girls!”

The semi-naked mansion owner looked at Chloe without much hint of recognition or even sanity. “Repent!”

“Shush! In fact, Eris, you literally spent years learning magic so that you could enspell hot women to make them get super-fat! And also to fuck you, which is a way more normal motivation, by the way. And you would've gotten away with it, if it weren't for one pesky, all-American witch on her summer break...”

Eris stared at Chloe with bloodshot eyes. He didn't appear to have slept, and Chloe wasn't sure he was understanding a word she said.

“That heroic girl would be me, by the way. In case we aren't clear.” Chloe added.

Eris rang his handbell.

“Repent! Slave of Gluttony! Repent your fattening urges! And flee! The End is Nigh! Repent, and get thee across the mountains to Texas, before it is too late.”

Chloe's eye's narrowed.

“Okay, I'm gonna let 'Slave of Gluttony' slide this time, because you're obviously having a bit of a moment, and I'm not a girl to kick a man when he's down. And, also, because I've been on a bulk for powerlifting, and, if I'm honest, after all the nights I've chugged weight gain shakes then made my boyfriend spoonfeed me entire kilos of peanut butter and more, maybe I am a teeny bit gluttonous. Oh, and I do have way more ass and thighs – and core muscles and biceps, by the way – than last time I was over here, so...” Chloe paused. “By the way, Eris, do you like my new size 18 curves? They're all muscle – um, I mean they're mostly muscle, plus a little fluff for my boyfriend's enjoyment Let me give you a twirl...”

Eris, although apparently too crazed to reply to questions in words, made a throaty sound as Chloe turned around to showcase her beefy curves from all angles.

“Oh, you like that? Oh...” Chloe asked, before noticing the Mill Avenue warlock had creamed his shorts while staring at her. “Oh good, you still do. In that case, since you've stopped shouting abut fatties and repentance like a crazy man, let's get you back to your place and get some coffee into you. If you promise to be good, I will also bring my friend Lara along. Although, mainly because I want to warn her you're a shady warlock, and I can do that if she comes with.”

 

* *

 

Eris lifted a steaming cup of black coffee with both hands, and slurped gingerly. He was in his mansion's old but updated brick kitchen, having been escorted home by Chloe and her hot, fluffy Greek friend; then pushed in a cold shower by Chloe while Lara rummaged for presentable clothes – she was pleasantly impressed by how much better he looked in the pressed linen shirt and pants she selected for him.

“Thanks, Chloe. You too, Lara.” Eris managed, after a few gulps.

“Drink up, then eat this. It's good for you.” Chloe said, thrusting a plate towards Eris.

Chloe Southern's idea of food that was good for someone in a delicate state was a plate of pop-tarts. About twelve.

“Ugh. No thanks, Chloe.”

“Eat! You're hung-over. You need some solid, healthy food. Such as pop tarts. Don't argue.”

“I'm not arguing, Chloe. I'm just not hung-over.” Eris claimed.

Chloe snorted and took a good look at Eris from several angles. “You are so! I've never been so hungover, by the way, as to run around the street naked ringing a bell and yelling at people. Eat!”

Eris sighed. “No, Chloe. I don't have time! I spent the entire night in study of arcane tomes, and then in meditation with the aid of puissant herbs-”

“Erbs, huh? This is sounding very much like a way to get a hangover.” Chloe interrupted.

“No! The herbs are fine. Perfectly natural, and harmless aids to extra-corporeal awareness! My state of mental distress, from which you have kindly rescued and calmed me, Chloe, arose not from working all night and seeking answers from the herbs, but from WHAT I LEARNED. Of the horror now facing Los Angeles!”

Chloe gave due consideration to the warlock's words. Then she slid the plate of pop-tarts back towards her and started munching on one.

“I don't like the sound of a horror facing Los Angeles. Talk. Right now I still think you just got stoned last night, though.”

Chloe munched another pop-tart. She was slightly surprised when Eris – whom she had first encountered while he was using magic to fatten up the ladies of Mill Avenue – slid the plate away from her.

“Gif my pop-tarts back, Erif! I'm fucking starving!” Chloe said with a full mouth.

Eris raised a finger to request forbearance.

“Alas, Chloe! But the hunger you feel is not just that of a healthy and athletic young woman with curves to maintain. In fact, the urge to gluttony that affects you now, indeed, along with every other person in LA to various extents, is the dire curse of the very horror that threatens to doom our city!” Eris paused for dramatic effect, and reached for a ancient tome with an engraving to illustrate his point. “It is a dread curse, known to occultists as the Gluttony of Fattara!”

“Uh huh?” Chloe said.

Eris looked up from the ancient book he'd selected. He'd opened the tome to a truly horrifying page, which showed the Doom that came to Sarnath – the fabled city being destroyed in an apocalypse of gluttony. The Gluttony of Fattara! The very horror that, at that very moment, imperiled the city of Los Angeles. He had rather hoped Chloe, who was in all likelihood the only sorceress remotely powerful enough to avert the Doom, wouldn't sound so nonplussed by it.

Then Eris looked up, and saw Chloe's eyes – and Lara's next to her.

“Oh no!”

Lara had carried a plate of donuts from Eris's refrigerator, and placed them down between herself and Chloe, along with a couple of cartons of heavy cream.

“Chloe?” Lara asked. “Do you think Eris is just making up silly stories to stop us eating his food?”

“Yeah, I think he is, Ms van Fluffyheim. Would you like me to feed you a chocolate donut?”

“Mmm! Yes please, Chloe! I've never felt so hungry in my life! Let's gorge!” Lara enthused.

Eris glanced at a sigil on his kitchen wall. It was a protective sign. It had melted. “Chloe!” He exclaimed. “Look at the picture in the book, and look at your reflection! It's the Gluttony of Fattara! You have to fight it, Chloe!”

Chloe licked the last of the donut she'd been feeding to Lara van Floofenheim, and swallowed it with an expression of orgasmic pleasure.

“I think Lara's right, Eris.” Chloe sneered. “I think you just don't want us to eat your donuts! How mean! And, as your punishment...”

Eris knew that in a duel of sorcerous powers he was ludicrously outgunned Chloe Southern. Still, he tried. He formed his hands into the Sign of Gourmek, the most potent charm of befuddlement in his possession. It wasn't even close to enough.

Before Eris could form his spell, Chloe Southern languidly aimed a three-fingered gesture at him. His fingers cramped, as if from electric shock, and glowing translucent cuffs solidified around his wrists, then yanked him backwards to the brick wall and fused in place. He was, no doubt, imprisoned. And in his own kitchen!

“Chloe!” Eris yelled. “Read the damn book! Look at the page, and then your reflection!”

Neither Chloe Southern nor Lara van Floofenheim seemed wont to pay his warning any heed. Instead, on Ms Floofenheim's suggestion, they were much more interested in making a fried breakfast. Never in a million years had Eris imagined that he would find himself wishing that he didn't maintain such an overstocked kitchen...

“We should make French toast, Chloe!”

“Totes, Ms Fluffyheim! Can I have the first loaf?”

“Of course, Chloe! If you let me have the first gallon of chocolate milk!”

 

*

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Oh shit, but I"m really thinking that Chloe might wind up seriously *huge* during this. I"ve been hoping to see her get too fat for her muscles, or have those spell boosted muscles turn to fat, for an arc and have to deal with being totally out of shape but dammmnnnn....

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Chapter 9: California Feeding (part 9)

 

Mid-afternoon in Mill Avenue, and the winter sky was darkening with cloud.

 

Hic-urrrrrp! I don’t feel so good.” Groaned a severely overfed Chloe Southern as she lay back in her chair in the old kitchen of Number 12 Mill Avenue. She looked fairly green at the sight of yet another empty plate of chocolate cake on the table in front of her, and mildly alarmed that she could see her painfully stuffed belly past her boobs!

Eris, his arms aching from being manacled to his mansion’s old brickwork, looked on with horror and fatigue. Fatigue, because he’d been watching Chloe and her friend Lara gorge themselves for hours. They’d cleaned out everything in his kitchen that could be fried, drenched in milk, or otherwise eaten for breakfast; and then they’d chugged their way through his dairy refrigerator while impatiently waiting for three trays of burgers to roast in an oven. Cheeseburgers were what the gluttonous Lara had wanted for her lunch. And lots of them. With a lot of gooey fillings that now splattered the table and the girls' tops. 

Of course, Ms Lara van Floofenheim, had she been in control of herself, probably would not have wanted cheeseburgers for lunch. And probably no lunch, nor food at all, for many days. After all, the overly curvy Greek girl had taken less than an hour to devour more than her half-share of three full boxes of cereal, flooded in chocolate milk, plus two plates of pop tarts, and she’d carried straight on from there for the rest of the morning. This was where the horror crept in. A glowing orange mist, visible not only to a skilled warlock but even to an untrained observer, formed a hazy, shifting fog before the gluttonous girls’ eyes. It was, Eris knew from his study of arcane tomes, the outward manifestation of that most potent of curses, leaking into the material world: the Gluttony of Fattara!

Somehow, some reckless fool had cast the Sign of Fattara into a great metal monument in downtown LA, and spread printed copies of its form via the logo on the Sarnath Chocolates boxes that had, by now, been sold throughout the city. That act of geometrical folly, performed when the stars were aligned right, must have weakened the walls of reality between Los Angeles and the notorious Fat Dimension, where lurked the terrible, gluttonous doom of cities. Fattara!

With the power Fattara coursing into LA, it was no surprise that so many young women had been porking up lately! Eris had been rather enjoying the view, for the last few weeks – bouncing hotties jogging past him with a little extra bounce in their tight Lycra, etc! But he’d ascribed it to simple winter gluttony. He’d erred! The dreadful, orange, mind-fogging mist that now hovered before the eyes of Chloe and Lara was unmistakable. It was exactly as shown in his ancient book. It was the Gluttony of Fattara, warping the minds of the residents of the city, making them into various degrees of glutton – and then, when everyone was too bloated to resist, the Doom would claim the city itself!

“Chloe!” Eris said tiredly, his voice etched with the pain of his aching arms. “You have to resist it! You don’t want any more food, Chloe!”

“So hungry.” Gasped the blonde swim-team captain faintly. “But so stuffed! I can’t... Urp. Eat any... Hic. Urp. Uh...”

Eris felt a surge of hope.

“That’s it Chloe! Fight it! Use your feeling of sickening overstuffedness to bolster your self-control!”

Chloe spoke slowly, sounding dazed and emotional. “I don’t have any.”

“Yes, Chloe! You have a steely willpower! Fight the Gluttony! Only you have the power to save us – and, most likely, the entirety of Los Angeles – before it is too late!”

“Too stuffed to fight anything. Hicc!” Chloe burped dejectedly. Milk drooled down her chin. Her strong jawline looked softened by her hours of gluttony.

Nuts! Eris thought to himself. “It is as I feared! The Gluttony of Fattara is not only inflicting an insatiable appetite on those two sophomore super-hotties, but, moreover, it is also causing their vast calorie binges to digest with supernatural speed, and fatten their already-curvy physiques! Though, I suppose I should have realised that earlier, when Chloe finished her fourth gallon of milk and went hunting in the refrigerators for more! And then ate my cream reserve when she couldn’t find any!”

Chloe Southern, the gifted arch-sorceress with the body of a – overfed – Amazon warrior queen and the looks of a super-hot blonde girl next door who had turned down countless request to compete in Miss America because she’d be forced to diet, was looking seriously thicc! Not that she’d been skinny in the morning when she’d shoved Eris into his mansion. In fact she’d been one solid hottie. She’d gently nudged him along towards his mansion, with one hand – but there’d been a clear feeling of force and muscle, such that, even in his slightly crazed state, Eris had realised that resisting Chloe’s shove would be like trying to wrestle a pickup truck. Anyway, all those powerlifting muscles on a strong frame meant Eris hadn’t really noticed that the mountains of fried eggs and bacon and potatoes, which Chloe had been gorging on, had really bulked her out! And now she looked seriously... Thicc! Her vastly long thighs looked huger and fleshier, and her beefy shoulders and arms were softer. And her belly bulged out, distending her formerly-loose black T-shirt around her heavy food bulge. Still, Chloe Southern had entered Eris’s mansion with the muscles of a heavy quarterback bulging through her clothes, and, even if the Gluttony of Fattara had somehow thickened her frame with dozens of pounds of flesh, as Eris gauged, she looked strong enough to carry it off...

The same wasn’t so true of Lara van Floofenheim. Lara, who lacked the vast powerlifting thighs and muscular frame of Chloe, and who had gorged herself to even greater excess without even a hint of guilt or a moment of self control, didn’t look thicc, so much as downright fat! She’d gorged herself on mountains of fried food, calorie-heavy carbs, and gallons of rich chocolate creamshakes, and – pausing only to massage her bloated abdomen for short breaks, during which the Curse of Fattara had made her flabby body assimilate days of calories in a few minutes – she must have taken in half again as much as Chloe Southern. And Lara had already been fat to the point where her more-than size-twelve figure had nowhere left to hide excess flab. So, now, Lara’s heavy boobs sagged over a belly hefty with fat as well as bloated with food. In fact, the rich girl had reached under her skintight XL T-shirt and inelegantly removed her large but now too-tight black 38E bra, and flung it in Eris’s direction. If he hadn’t been in terror of the looming Doom of LA, it would have been a huge turn-on.

“Don’t listen to him, Chloe!” Lara burped with a mouth full of cream cake, her chubby face flush from excess binging on soda and refined sugars. “He just wants to steal our food so we starve! OH, MY BELLY!”

Ms van Floofenheim was briefly incapacitated by a painful protest from her grossly overstuffed guts.

“Do listen to me, Chloe!” Eris countered. “You need to snap out of it! You need to use your mystical powers to save Los Angeles! Um, and also you need to save your friend: she’ll burst if she keeps eating like this!”

As if in confirmation of Eris’ claim, Lara van Floofenheim gave an agonised cry as she cradled her taut belly. And then, as soon as it passed, she grabbed a handful of cream crackers and a slab of Stilton cheese, and started cramming them into her face.

Chloe groaned and eyed the pile of half-eaten donuts beside her, and then sluggishly reached for one.

“Chloe!” Eris yelled.

“Too hungry. Can’t help myself!” Chloe burped miserably.

Then Eris had a brainwave. He could appeal to Chloe’s vanity! She seemed like her subconscious was already warring against the Curse of Fattara: perhaps the right emotional boost could be enough to push it to victory?

“Chloe! What would your boyfriend think of you, gorging uncontrollably like this?” Asked the warlock, slyly.

Chloe paused as she tried to shove a third donut into her mouth at once. Then she sniffed sadly. “My boyfriend likes me fluffy...” She protested.

“Ah, shoot!” Eris muttered. But then, Chloe continued.

“... But he’d also spank me for getting too fat, and ruining my pool times. And he’d be sad I didn’t video it for him. Aw, SNAP!”

A tear rolled down the blonde’s cheek. Then, as she wiped her eyes with the back of her hand, Eris saw a blaze of green flame burn from behind her fingers... And then the Doom of Fattara – the mystic mind-fogging mist of orange motes before her eyes – dissipated in a quick puff.

“Shit!” Eris cried. The Curse of Fattara, the most absolute cosmic horror in his entire collection of arcane tomes, had just been pushed away by some primordial Titan strength within the blonde college girl, with apparently no more than subconscious effort. Truly, Chloe Southern’s power was terrifying... But also quite a turn-on, in a kind of kinky way, Eris had to admit!

Chloe groaned as she shook her head and leaned heavily on the table to stand.

Ugh! What the fuck happened?” Chloe moaned groggily. “I feel... Heavy! Like, fat! Shit! I warned Beck he was gonna get more of me back in January than he kissed goodbye to before the holidays, but this is ridiculous...” Chloe examined her super-thick, leggings-stretching thighs. “... This has to be like thirty pounds! Ugh!”

“Try sixty.” Eris interrupted. He was feeling pissed about being chained to his wall by unbreakable mystic manacles, and annoying Chloe felt good, now she was apparently back.

Chloe looked up. Of course, annoying a college girl with the powers of a primordial Titan at her beck and call might not be a bright idea...

“What the fuck did you say?” Chloe snarled at Eris, and the full viridian glow of power behind her eyes flared up. “Did you do this to me?”

“No!” Eris screamed, as Chloe’s fingers crackled with green arc lightning. “I didn’t do anything, Chloe! Focus, Chloe! Remember, I was right in the middle of telling you about the Doom that Came to Sarnath, which, right now, is coming to LA, when that orange, mind-fogging mist you can see around Lara’s head afflicted you, too! That’s what did this to you! And then you chained me to the wall!”

Chloe seemed to have an internal mental struggle for a moment. Then she shook her head, and the green radiant light from her eyes – which, Eris noticed, seemed to travel through solid objects without leaving a shadow – quieted.

“Oh.” Chloe mumbled. “Oops. Sorry.”

One wave of the blonde’s hands caused the unbreakable green manacles around Eris’ wrists to dissolve. He rubbed his sore arms, as Chloe flicked a finger and the same manacles reappeared around Lara’s arms, and slammed them fused to the solid table. Ms van Floofenheim screamed in rage, as she suddenly realised she’d been prevented from gorging any more.

“Sorry, Lara!” Chloe offered, her eyes widening sincerely. “But I really can’t let you burst! I’ll fix you later... Sorry!”

Eris’ hands hurt, as blood rushed painfully back to them after hours restrained, and he fumbled to open the book he’d been showing to Chloe earlier.

“So?” Chloe asked him. “This Gluttony of Fattara. Is it the kind of cosmic horror that affects a whole city the size of LA, or just your dining room? Or some area in-between, like just Beverly Hills and West Hollywood or something?”

Eris rolled his eyes. Of course, Chloe hadn’t been aware of the distant sirens that had been wailing through the air all morning and afternoon while she and Lara gorged obliviously.

“The whole of Los Angeles, Chloe. It’s a city-destroying Doom, remember?” Eris explained impatiently.

“Yeah, I know.” Chloe retorted petulantly. “But LA’s huge! So, maybe the Doom will only affect a little bit? Don’t look at me like that! I’m not as dumb as I look! It’s not a stupid question! What does even the ‘Whole of Los Angeles’ mean? Does San Fernando count?”

Eris muttered, grabbed the TV remote, and flicked on a news channel.

“Oh.” Chloe said.

“Satisfied?” Eris asked.

“Well, I didn’t say I didn’t believe you!”

“You pretty much did!”

That said, Chloe and Eris quieted, as they took in the horror on the television news. A video reel played, showing fires and devastation, as great masses of gluttonous Angelinos smashed the windows of downtown food stores and raided fast food joints. Here, a ring of police cars formed a wall of steel, defended by fat coppers, who were defending a favourite donut shop near their precinct HQ from looters, even as they gorged on boxloads of the establishment’s sugary goods. There, a chocolate truck was being savaged by a horde of people, all growing fatter by the minute as they tore their way through the chocolatey contents of an entire shipping crate! And the camera returned to a studio – a San Francisco studio – where the newsreader read her script while stuffing her face with a plate of donuts, even as her co-host snored with his head on a pile of sugary snacks.

“Um.” Chloe began. “I don’t watch TV news. Is it always like this?”

“No!” Eris exclaimed. “It’s what I said, Chloe! The End is Nigh!”

“Oh. Well, in that case...”

Chloe wiped her mouth clean with a towel, and grabbed a glass of water, while pausing for dramatic effect.

“... We’d better do something about it. But first...”

But first? What comes ahead of this, in priority?” Eris arched an eyebrow.

“... But first.” Chloe continued, eyeing her super fattened-up thighs and beefy, lycra-clad hips. “I’m a nineteen year old blonde girl from Hollywood, and we are going to need to take a few minutes for me to scream hysterically about what’s just happened to my figure!”

 

*

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28 minutes ago, flyer33 said:

Chapter 9: California Feeding (part 9)

 

Mid-afternoon in Mill Avenue, and the winter sky was darkening with cloud.

 

Hic-urrrrrp! I don’t feel so good.” Groaned a severely overfed Chloe Southern as she lay back in her chair in the old kitchen of Number 12 Mill Avenue. She looked fairly green at the sight of yet another empty plate of chocolate cake on the table in front of her, and mildly alarmed that she could see her painfully stuffed belly past her boobs!

Eris, his arms aching from being manacled to his mansion’s old brickwork, looked on with horror and fatigue. Fatigue, because he’d been watching Chloe and her friend Lara gorge themselves for hours. They’d cleaned out everything in his kitchen that could be fried, drenched in milk, or otherwise eaten for breakfast; and then they’d chugged their way through his dairy refrigerator while impatiently waiting for three trays of burgers to roast in an oven. Cheeseburgers were what the gluttonous Lara had wanted for her lunch. And lots of them. With a lot of gooey fillings that now splattered the table and the girls' tops. 

Of course, Ms Lara van Floofenheim, had she been in control of herself, probably would not have wanted cheeseburgers for lunch. And probably no lunch, nor food at all, for many days. After all, the overly curvy Greek girl had taken less than an hour to devour more than her half-share of three full boxes of cereal, flooded in chocolate milk, plus two plates of pop tarts, and she’d carried straight on from there for the rest of the morning. This was where the horror crept in. A glowing orange mist, visible not only to a skilled warlock but even to an untrained observer, formed a hazy, shifting fog before the gluttonous girls’ eyes. It was, Eris knew from his study of arcane tomes, the outward manifestation of that most potent of curses, leaking into the material world: the Gluttony of Fattara!

Somehow, some reckless fool had cast the Sign of Fattara into a great metal monument in downtown LA, and spread printed copies of its form via the logo on the Sarnath Chocolates boxes that had, by now, been sold throughout the city. That act of geometrical folly, performed when the stars were aligned right, must have weakened the walls of reality between Los Angeles and the notorious Fat Dimension, where lurked the terrible, gluttonous doom of cities. Fattara!

With the power Fattara coursing into LA, it was no surprise that so many young women had been porking up lately! Eris had been rather enjoying the view, for the last few weeks – bouncing hotties jogging past him with a little extra bounce in their tight Lycra, etc! But he’d ascribed it to simple winter gluttony. He’d erred! The dreadful, orange, mind-fogging mist that now hovered before the eyes of Chloe and Lara was unmistakable. It was exactly as shown in his ancient book. It was the Gluttony of Fattara, warping the minds of the residents of the city, making them into various degrees of glutton – and then, when everyone was too bloated to resist, the Doom would claim the city itself!

“Chloe!” Eris said tiredly, his voice etched with the pain of his aching arms. “You have to resist it! You don’t want any more food, Chloe!”

“So hungry.” Gasped the blonde swim-team captain faintly. “But so stuffed! I can’t... Urp. Eat any... Hic. Urp. Uh...”

Eris felt a surge of hope.

“That’s it Chloe! Fight it! Use your feeling of sickening overstuffedness to bolster your self-control!”

Chloe spoke slowly, sounding dazed and emotional. “I don’t have any.”

“Yes, Chloe! You have a steely willpower! Fight the Gluttony! Only you have the power to save us – and, most likely, the entirety of Los Angeles – before it is too late!”

“Too stuffed to fight anything. Hicc!” Chloe burped dejectedly. Milk drooled down her chin. Her strong jawline looked softened by her hours of gluttony.

Nuts! Eris thought to himself. “It is as I feared! The Gluttony of Fattara is not only inflicting an insatiable appetite on those two sophomore super-hotties, but, moreover, it is also causing their vast calorie binges to digest with supernatural speed, and fatten their already-curvy physiques! Though, I suppose I should have realised that earlier, when Chloe finished her fourth gallon of milk and went hunting in the refrigerators for more! And then ate my cream reserve when she couldn’t find any!”

Chloe Southern, the gifted arch-sorceress with the body of a – overfed – Amazon warrior queen and the looks of a super-hot blonde girl next door who had turned down countless request to compete in Miss America because she’d be forced to diet, was looking seriously thicc! Not that she’d been skinny in the morning when she’d shoved Eris into his mansion. In fact she’d been one solid hottie. She’d gently nudged him along towards his mansion, with one hand – but there’d been a clear feeling of force and muscle, such that, even in his slightly crazed state, Eris had realised that resisting Chloe’s shove would be like trying to wrestle a pickup truck. Anyway, all those powerlifting muscles on a strong frame meant Eris hadn’t really noticed that the mountains of fried eggs and bacon and potatoes, which Chloe had been gorging on, had really bulked her out! And now she looked seriously... Thicc! Her vastly long thighs looked huger and fleshier, and her beefy shoulders and arms were softer. And her belly bulged out, distending her formerly-loose black T-shirt around her heavy food bulge. Still, Chloe Southern had entered Eris’s mansion with the muscles of a heavy quarterback bulging through her clothes, and, even if the Gluttony of Fattara had somehow thickened her frame with dozens of pounds of flesh, as Eris gauged, she looked strong enough to carry it off...

The same wasn’t so true of Lara van Floofenheim. Lara, who lacked the vast powerlifting thighs and muscular frame of Chloe, and who had gorged herself to even greater excess without even a hint of guilt or a moment of self control, didn’t look thicc, so much as downright fat! She’d gorged herself on mountains of fried food, calorie-heavy carbs, and gallons of rich chocolate creamshakes, and – pausing only to massage her bloated abdomen for short breaks, during which the Curse of Fattara had made her flabby body assimilate days of calories in a few minutes – she must have taken in half again as much as Chloe Southern. And Lara had already been fat to the point where her more-than size-twelve figure had nowhere left to hide excess flab. So, now, Lara’s heavy boobs sagged over a belly hefty with fat as well as bloated with food. In fact, the rich girl had reached under her skintight XL T-shirt and inelegantly removed her large but now too-tight black 38E bra, and flung it in Eris’s direction. If he hadn’t been in terror of the looming Doom of LA, it would have been a huge turn-on.

“Don’t listen to him, Chloe!” Lara burped with a mouth full of cream cake, her chubby face flush from excess binging on soda and refined sugars. “He just wants to steal our food so we starve! OH, MY BELLY!”

Ms van Floofenheim was briefly incapacitated by a painful protest from her grossly overstuffed guts.

“Do listen to me, Chloe!” Eris countered. “You need to snap out of it! You need to use your mystical powers to save Los Angeles! Um, and also you need to save your friend: she’ll burst if she keeps eating like this!”

As if in confirmation of Eris’ claim, Lara van Floofenheim gave an agonised cry as she cradled her taut belly. And then, as soon as it passed, she grabbed a handful of cream crackers and a slab of Stilton cheese, and started cramming them into her face.

Chloe groaned and eyed the pile of half-eaten donuts beside her, and then sluggishly reached for one.

“Chloe!” Eris yelled.

“Too hungry. Can’t help myself!” Chloe burped miserably.

Then Eris had a brainwave. He could appeal to Chloe’s vanity! She seemed like her subconscious was already warring against the Curse of Fattara: perhaps the right emotional boost could be enough to push it to victory?

“Chloe! What would your boyfriend think of you, gorging uncontrollably like this?” Asked the warlock, slyly.

Chloe paused as she tried to shove a third donut into her mouth at once. Then she sniffed sadly. “My boyfriend likes me fluffy...” She protested.

“Ah, shoot!” Eris muttered. But then, Chloe continued.

“... But he’d also spank me for getting too fat, and ruining my pool times. And he’d be sad I didn’t video it for him. Aw, SNAP!”

A tear rolled down the blonde’s cheek. Then, as she wiped her eyes with the back of her hand, Eris saw a blaze of green flame burn from behind her fingers... And then the Doom of Fattara – the mystic mind-fogging mist of orange motes before her eyes – dissipated in a quick puff.

“Shit!” Eris cried. The Curse of Fattara, the most absolute cosmic horror in his entire collection of arcane tomes, had just been pushed away by some primordial Titan strength within the blonde college girl, with apparently no more than subconscious effort. Truly, Chloe Southern’s power was terrifying... But also quite a turn-on, in a kind of kinky way, Eris had to admit!

Chloe groaned as she shook her head and leaned heavily on the table to stand.

Ugh! What the fuck happened?” Chloe moaned groggily. “I feel... Heavy! Like, fat! Shit! I warned Beck he was gonna get more of me back in January than he kissed goodbye to before the holidays, but this is ridiculous...” Chloe examined her super-thick, leggings-stretching thighs. “... This has to be like thirty pounds! Ugh!”

“Try sixty.” Eris interrupted. He was feeling pissed about being chained to his wall by unbreakable mystic manacles, and annoying Chloe felt good, now she was apparently back.

Chloe looked up. Of course, annoying a college girl with the powers of a primordial Titan at her beck and call might not be a bright idea...

“What the fuck did you say?” Chloe snarled at Eris, and the full viridian glow of power behind her eyes flared up. “Did you do this to me?”

“No!” Eris screamed, as Chloe’s fingers crackled with green arc lightning. “I didn’t do anything, Chloe! Focus, Chloe! Remember, I was right in the middle of telling you about the Doom that Came to Sarnath, which, right now, is coming to LA, when that orange, mind-fogging mist you can see around Lara’s head afflicted you, too! That’s what did this to you! And then you chained me to the wall!”

Chloe seemed to have an internal mental struggle for a moment. Then she shook her head, and the green radiant light from her eyes – which, Eris noticed, seemed to travel through solid objects without leaving a shadow – quieted.

“Oh.” Chloe mumbled. “Oops. Sorry.”

One wave of the blonde’s hands caused the unbreakable green manacles around Eris’ wrists to dissolve. He rubbed his sore arms, as Chloe flicked a finger and the same manacles reappeared around Lara’s arms, and slammed them fused to the solid table. Ms van Floofenheim screamed in rage, as she suddenly realised she’d been prevented from gorging any more.

“Sorry, Lara!” Chloe offered, her eyes widening sincerely. “But I really can’t let you burst! I’ll fix you later... Sorry!”

Eris’ hands hurt, as blood rushed painfully back to them after hours restrained, and he fumbled to open the book he’d been showing to Chloe earlier.

“So?” Chloe asked him. “This Gluttony of Fattara. Is it the kind of cosmic horror that affects a whole city the size of LA, or just your dining room? Or some area in-between, like just Beverly Hills and West Hollywood or something?”

Eris rolled his eyes. Of course, Chloe hadn’t been aware of the distant sirens that had been wailing through the air all morning and afternoon while she and Lara gorged obliviously.

“The whole of Los Angeles, Chloe. It’s a city-destroying Doom, remember?” Eris explained impatiently.

“Yeah, I know.” Chloe retorted petulantly. “But LA’s huge! So, maybe the Doom will only affect a little bit? Don’t look at me like that! I’m not as dumb as I look! It’s not a stupid question! What does even the ‘Whole of Los Angeles’ mean? Does San Fernando count?”

Eris muttered, grabbed the TV remote, and flicked on a news channel.

“Oh.” Chloe said.

“Satisfied?” Eris asked.

“Well, I didn’t say I didn’t believe you!”

“You pretty much did!”

That said, Chloe and Eris quieted, as they took in the horror on the television news. A video reel played, showing fires and devastation, as great masses of gluttonous Angelinos smashed the windows of downtown food stores and raided fast food joints. Here, a ring of police cars formed a wall of steel, defended by fat coppers, who were defending a favourite donut shop near their precinct HQ from looters, even as they gorged on boxloads of the establishment’s sugary goods. There, a chocolate truck was being savaged by a horde of people, all growing fatter by the minute as they tore their way through the chocolatey contents of an entire shipping crate! And the camera returned to a studio – a San Francisco studio – where the newsreader read her script while stuffing her face with a plate of donuts, even as her co-host snored with his head on a pile of sugary snacks.

“Um.” Chloe began. “I don’t watch TV news. Is it always like this?”

“No!” Eris exclaimed. “It’s what I said, Chloe! The End is Nigh!”

“Oh. Well, in that case...”

Chloe wiped her mouth clean with a towel, and grabbed a glass of water, while pausing for dramatic effect.

“... We’d better do something about it. But first...”

But first? What comes ahead of this, in priority?” Eris arched an eyebrow.

“... But first.” Chloe continued, eyeing her super fattened-up thighs and beefy, lycra-clad hips. “I’m a nineteen year old blonde girl from Hollywood, and we are going to need to take a few minutes for me to scream hysterically about what’s just happened to my figure!”

 

*

Great Chapter!

Would be better had more body descriptions.

Alas!

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Chapter 9: California Feeding (part 10)

 

KABOOM!

 

“Yay!” Cried the leather-jacketed blonde beefcake, bouncing happily on her heels and sending palpable shockwaves through the hard concrete of the new Beverly Hills plaza. In the middle distance, shards of warped and twisted steel marked the location where the Sarnath Chocolates monument had once stood. “Yay for Evocation magic!”

Eris rolled his eyes. “Nice aim, Chloe. But disintegration is Transmutation magic.”

“Shut up! It’s Evocation. Because it blows stuff up.”

“It’s Transmutation, Chloe. Because it changes the nature of something.”

“So does a Fireball! Which is Evocation. QED!” Chloe smirked.

“Do you understand anything about the vast powers that answer to your every whim, despite their lying far beyond the grasp of more serious academic students of the mystic arts, Miss Southern?”

The blonde pouted. “I do a little bit. Anyway, I was pulling your leg, Mr Warlock. I remember now: disintegration is transmutation.”

“Good for you.”

“But it’s also quite like evocation...”

“Oh, shut up. Let’s go home and check on Rebeca and the others.”

 

* *

 

2 hours earlier...

 

Eris munched an apple, as he listened to a blonde nineteen year old with cosmos-rending powers having a full-on tantrum, over her figure, within the walk-in wardrobe of his guest bedroom.

“It’s NOT CUTE ENOUGH!”

This was why Eris dated older women.

To add menace to the mere annoyance of a teenage meltdown, Chloe Southern’s already immense mystical powers were further augmented by her bond to what Eris called the LA Source: the most potent confluence of arcane energy lines on the West Coast. Which added the frisson to Chloe’s bad mood that if she got too angry there might be bad consequences.

“Do you think you might want to calm down before you cause an earthquake, Chloe? You know, it’d be bad if you stopped the Doom of Fattara from destroying the city by shaking it down yourself.”

“SHUT UP! I’m in shock, here! And LA has earthquakes all the time.”

“Not big ones, Chloe.”

From within the wardrobe, Chloe made a small sobbing sound, as she wrestled the zip of a tight black leather bodysuit. Then she emerged to face the nest of mirrors.

Aw! No! It’s too fucking small, and there’s no way to make these thighs look cute!”

Eris drooled quietly and wished he’d set up one of his hidden cameras.

The blonde swim-captain had squeezed, strapped, and poured herself into a 2XL leather Catwoman costume, complete with cat ears and mask, which Eris had bought for Rebeca Moore, his paramour, to flaunt her figure – until she had quickly outgrown it, and popped a few stitches down the side. Chloe overfilled it. She was all curves, and epic boobs (hmm, more Powergirl than Catwoman, Eris mused): thick, firm flab over a heavy-duty powerlifting frame. Her thighs had always gone on for days, in length terms, but now, to a curve connoisseur like Eris, their lush thickness, squeezed into too-tight leather, made him check his racing pulse to confirm he wasn’t in a deep, herb-fuelled wet dream. But Chloe Southern was as very real as her lush hips and full ass were round... And very angry.

“Frack!” Chloe yelled at her cat-ear clad reflection. “I’m too fat! My boyfriend will never want to fuck me like this!”

“Um.” Eris started suggesting that the opposite was the case, but then wisely shut up in the face of way over 300 lbs of angry teenage Amazon warrior-queen / primordial Titan.

“Um, what? Mr Oh-So-Clever Warlock? You disagree?”

“I think your boyfriend’s a very lucky boy.” Eris replied, and then inwardly congratulated himself on his glibness, which clearly derailed Chloe’s train of thought.

“You know, he is fucking lucky!” Chloe pounced happily on Eris’s point. “And I tell him so, all the time! But, you know what?”

“What?”

“Aha! Even though I tell Beck how lucky he is, to have a hot girlfriend with boobs the size of his head, who’s stronger than him, and faster in the pool, and does everything he wants in bed, including lots and lots of kinky feeding sessions...”

Eris didn’t bother trying to stop himself drool.

“... Oh, so much peanut butter and cheesecake, Mmmm. Um, where was I? Yeah, even though Beck’s super lucky to have me, he still only fucks me two-to-four times a day on weekdays. And only like five on weekends now! And I have to work hard for that! It’s not fair! It’s like he doesn’t realise I’m a horny girl, and I have needs!”

Chloe reached the end of her complaint.

“He sounds useless. You deserve a real man, Chloe.” Eris suggested. Chloe ignored any irony, if she noticed any.

“I do! Hmm. But Beck is my boyfriend and I love him to bits, even though he doesn’t fuck me hard enough, or often enough, and he is much weaker than me! However, that is the problem! He already doesn’t fuck me as often as when we first met, and I think I might have been getting too fluffy for him, because of all the powerlifting...”

Eris sighed.

“... And now I’m super-fluffy. In fact, the Gluttony of Fattara has made me really fat! And...” Chloe sniffed unhappily. “I’m going to have to diet so hard if I want to keep my state champion title this summer.”

Chloe sat down heavily on Eris’ guest bed. This bent the springs and made her half of the mattress slump so far that Eris nearly lost his seat and fell onto her – which would have been oh-so-hot, but also would have risked making the cosmically overpowered sorceress angry again.

“You want my suggestion, Chloe?” Eris asked. “You don’t have to have it.”

Chloe took the bait.

“Yeah. I’m a very good listener.” Chloe claimed.

“I think you’re more of a Powergirl than a Catwoman. I see you more as smashing skyscrapers rather than climbing them. Anyway, the legs are about three inches too short for you.”

“Yeah, I am a better Powergirl.” Chloe confirmed. Then she sobbed briefly before recovering. “My best friend bought me a custom made Powergirl outfit from a New York couturier... But I’m too big for it, now!”

Eris eyed Chloe’s immense chest. The Catwoman costume squished her boobs as much as it could, but mainly the leather just stretched. And a side seam had popped, too.

“I’ll buy you a new one, Chloe.”

Eris was unprepared for the level of blonde delight emitted in reply.

“You will! Yay! Aw, I’m so happy I didn’t blast you to bits when we first met! Thank you, Eris! I mean, I’d kiss you, but I feel kinda fat.”

“You know I love curves, right, Chloe?”

“You lurve curves!” Chloe confirmed happily. “Oh. Okay, one little smooch.” Mwah! “But I’m not fucking you, Eris... Even though I’m horny. Food makes me horny, and I just ate enough calories for a month...”

“Two months.”

“Whatever. I’m not wearing this outfit to save LA, either. Even if the mask does conceal my identity...”

“So, you’d prefer to go with your idea of a mass mind-wipe spell on everyone in the city, if anyone happens you catch you throwing high-powered spells in public, rather than my superior suggestion of wearing a mask?”

“Yep!” Chloe confirmed happily.

“Hmm. Suit yourself, Chloe Southern. So, what are you gonna wear, out of interest? I mean, you’re welcome to choose anything from Rebeca’s 2XL phase, and she has a lot of clothes...”

Chloe didn’t think for long.

“Oh, my beat-up white trainers, cute white short shorts, and a pink crop top. And a leather jacket because it’s cold. I mean, I’m kinda too fat to pull it off, but there is a metropolis to save so I’ve got to wear something that’s me, right.”

“Plus, mass mind-wipe if anyone takes an unflattering picture, I suppose.”

“See! You do think like me!”

“I don’t think anything like you, Chloe.”

“Oh yeah? Well, how come we both thought of banishing the Doom of Fattara back to the Fat Dimension by blowing up that big metal sculpture outside Sarnath Chocolates?”

“It’s a pretty obvious plan, Chloe. Of course, I’m assuming you know where we can get some dynamite or equivalent...”

Chloe thumped her fists together. Green sparks flew and obligingly settled on her knuckles.

“Oh, totes!”

 

* *

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Chapter 9: California Feeding (part 11)

 

“So, I think that went pretty well!” Chloe said with extreme blonde enthusiasm as she climbed out of Eris’ car onto Mill Avenue. “One ugly piece of modern art blown up, and problem solved! And, I’m pretty sure I got all the security cameras with a shatter spell, so there’s no record of the brave heroes who saved LA from an interdimensional entity. Which is a bad thing for us, in a way. The Mayor might want to give us a cash prize, or something.”

“It’s not a bad thing, Chloe. The Mayor is a professional idiot. He’d probably be mad at us for blowing up a work of civic art that might otherwise win his office some sort of shit architecture award. And, more to the point, we can’t be certain we’re safe until all the power of Fattara that has already leaked into the city has dissipated.”

“Well, the people aren’t eating anymore! Even the cops had stopped eating donuts in that shop we passed on the way back. And that never happens! Therefore, the Gluttony of Fattara must be gone. QED.”

“Do you know what QED means, Chloe?” Eris asked.

“Quite easily done.” Chloe answered.

“Oh, really?”

“Yes, really. I once went on a date with a math major... Ugh, it was a horrible mistake. But I did learn that.”

“Mmm. You’re not sneaky enough to pretend to not know things you actually do know, are you, Ms Southern?”

“Um. No.”

“Right. In that case, let’s check on Sophie’s house first.”

“Yep.”

The two occultists had checked on Sophie’s mansion before heading downtown to deal with the sculpture of the Sign of Fattara. They’d found a scene of Hogarthian debauchery in the salon. Sophie and every one of her brunch guests had been hit by the Gluttony of Fattara, at least as hard as Chloe and Lara, and in the same period of time they’d gorged and gorged themselves senseless, until Sophie’s vast pantry and kitchen were all but bare. Penelope Plum and Mrs van Floofenheim had bellies so swollen they looked like airbags had inflated under their outfits.  The only woman not quite stuffed into an immobile food coma had been Mrs Rebeca Moore, the now-corpulent former beauty queen who was now enjoying a life of pampered luxury as a Mill Avenue trophy wife and Eris’ mistress. And Rebeca Moore was so fat she looked like she was overdue with twins – whereas in fact she was only a bit pregnant. Chloe had been shocked to see her former fitness instructor so super-obese, but apparently she’d piled on much of the new fat over the last few months due to her lusty appetite, so apparently that was fine.

Anyway, they’d then deposited Lara in Sophie’s salon for safekeeping, and Chloe was anxious to confirm that her friend was okay. So anxious, she didn’t pay much attention to the epic blast of lightning from the direction of Hollywood that blazed over the dark street behind her as she shoved open the front door.

Eris noticed the lightning. “Oh, shit!”

“Hey, Lara!” Chloe called. “Eris and I are back. Think everything’s gonna be ---”

BOOM!

Thunder washed over Mill Avenue. Windows shattered.

Eris had his head down, but no glass flew far enough to pose a danger.

“What the frack?” Chloe exclaimed.

The Mill Avenue ladies brunch association stirred from their food comas with groans, bellyaches, and gas. Mostly gas. The air in the salon turned ripe, despite the smashed window panes and a stiff wind from the dark outside.

Another sound intruded from the dark night. Another booming sound, but this time, not thunder. Words, in fact, spoken in an otherworldly voice. A voice, there could be no doubt in the mind of either Eris or Chloe, from the FAT DIMENSION.

“CHOOSE!”

Chloe looked around.

“Problem solved, huh, Chloe?” Eris whispered.

Mostly solved! I’m sure we blew up the right thing.”

“Uh huh. So what do you call that? I think it’s the voice of Fattara!”

“That’s bad.”

“But, Chloe. It might just be from the residual Fattara Energy that’s floating around LA – combined with all the gluttony energy from people gorging! I mean, we destroyed the geomantic dimensional link!”

“CHOOSE!” The alien voice boomed again.

Chloe whispered sideways to Eris, not sure why she was whispering, given the booming voice was rolling in from the direction of Hollywood.

“Choose what?”

“Don’t ask!” Eris whispered back.

“CHOOSE THE FORM OF THE DESTRUCTOR!” Boomed the immediate reply, this time from much nearer.

“Oh shit!” Eris said to Chloe. “I’ve seen this before. It is Fattara, trying to make us choose the shape of the Doom of Los Angeles!”

“That can’t be good. But, just with residual power, right.” Chloe asked.

“Yeah, probably. But...” Eris cleared his throat, and announced to Sophie’s salon. “Attention please, ladies! No one think of anything! Clear your minds! It is asking for us to choose the form of the Doom of Los Angeles. So no one think of anything!”

“Chloe, you’re not thinking of anything, right.” Eris asked quietly. “You’re a powerful sorceress, so it’ll want to latch onto your thoughts to empower the Doom.”

“I’m not thinking of anything.” Chloe confirmed. “I’m blonde, remember.”

“THE CHOICE IS MADE!”

“Shit!” Eris groaned. “Chloe! What did you think of?”

“Nothing! I swear!” Chloe protested.

Eris doubted this, as he had a nasty suspicion that Chloe was less of an airhead than she looked. However, he changed his mind as someone else in the room spoke. It was Mrs Rebeca Moore, with an ecstatic expression on her face as she opened a previously un-noticed box of boutique chocolates that she’d found under a cushion on the other half of her sofa.

“Mmm! Yum!” Exclaimed Rebeca Moore. “My favourite choccies!”

Eris and Chloe glanced in horror in Rebeca’s direction, as the fat former bikini champion continued, and said the name of the snack, and they noticed the curvy, caramel-complexion woman that was the brand logo.

“Karamel Kurves! Mmm, yum, yum!”

 

* *

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Hope the movie reference in the last section didn't go over people's heads. Anyway, here's the end of this chapter.  

 

Chapter 9: California Feeding (part 12/12)

Or:

The Doom That Came To Los Angeles

 

It was a dark, cloudy night in LA, but it wasn’t freezing cold. And there was an epic scene to watch, for anyone with a good vantage point, as the whole city filled with sirens and flashing lights and the authorities, with their officers suddenly freed from their uncontrollable, day-long urge to do nothing but gorge on fattening foods, began to address the chaos that had very nearly destroyed the city – and one more, grand monstrosity that still might.

Few places in LA offered such grand vistas as the best-placed rooftops in Beverly Hills. And, in the exquisitely situated neighbourhood of Mill Avenue, no view was better than that from the gently-sloping rooftop of the Smithe mansion, which was easily accessible from a roof-level window, or even from the grand balcony beneath.

It was therefore on Sophie Smithe’s rooftop that Chloe sat impatiently, next to Eris, and a few other residents who were not quite bloated into utter incapacity.

“Does Chloe want popcorn?” Called the voice of Sophie Smithe, from inside the rooftop window. The matron of Mill Avenue was much too bloated and inflexible to venture out onto her roof, but had recovered enough from her day of binge eating to resume her role as an over-generous hostess. Hence she was fetching food for anyone on her rooftop who was not painfully stuffed, and intermittently calling out the latest television news from the remaining news copters over Hollywood that hadn’t suffered a destructive mishap due to pilot gluttony earlier in the day.

Chloe put down the binoculars she’d acquired. “I could go for popcorn.” Then she resumed looking anxiously in the direction of Hollywood.

“If it goes south of Santa Monica I’m gonna kill it, public exposure or not.” She told Eris. “My parents live down there.”

“It’s nowhere near there. The news says...”

“Oh, no!” Chloe exclaimed. “Capitol Records! It’s destroying our precious landmarks!”

“And I thought you were upset when it squashed Roscoe’s House of Chicken and Waffles.” Eris laughed to himself.

“Not only! And Denny’s. And La Monarca Bakery and Café.” Chloe corrected with an irked tone. “I should’ve gone straight down there and blown it up!”

“No, Chloe! You can’t do that! We already saved LA when we disintegrated that infernal Sign. Without a link to Fattara’s dimension, that monster on Hollywood Boulevard is just... Well it’s just a semi-mindless hundred foot tall animated mass of liquid caramel in the shape of the BBW from the logo on the chocolate box! The shape drawn from Rebeca’s mind by the residual power of Fattara in our city. And I think five hundred police cars – and tanks now – can deal with it. They take enough of my money in damn taxes, so they can do something useful for a change!”

Eris was describing the Doom that Came to Los Angeles. Or what was left of it. A hundred foot tall woman, made of liquid caramel, smashing down buildings on Hollywood Boulevard and environs, deluging any police officers unwise enough to approach in thick, molten chocolate that turned the unfortunate lawmen into gluttonous 500 pounders by the time it was washed off... And that was about it. Weirdly enough, as bad as a hundred foot caramel golem sounded, all it was actually doing was trashing a few landmarks in a very rich district. The true Doom – being largely ignored by the news channels in favour of a real life kaiju – was the hypnotic influence of Fattara that had taken a grip on the people of LA until Chloe and Eris had destroyed the monumental metal sigil outside Sarnath Chocolates. Apparently that had been enough to banish the influence of Fattara from the West Coast – which, Eris feared, meant that whoever the reckless occultist was who’d set out to summon Fattara, they didn’t know what the fuck they were doing with the ritual; and that made them in some ways more dangerous. He resolved to fret about the question of Sarnath Chocolates and its presumably villainous owners later, at length.  First, it was his responsibility to dissuade the reckless Chloe Southern from doing anything reckless.

“But bullets don’t affect the Karamel Kurve Kaiju! Because it’s made of animated liquid.” Chloe protested that the city authorities and the National Guard were just wasting men by trying to stop the hundred foot monster she’d named the Karamel Kurve Kaiju.

“Doesn’t matter. It’s slowing down on its own. No power source from the Fat Dimension. So it’ll run down on its own, and there’s no need for you to blow anything up, Chloe.”

“Aw. Fine. Unless it goes south.”

Eris crossed his fingers that wouldn’t happen. The last thing he needed was the authorities looking into his business, in connection with a reckless blonde super-witch who wouldn’t keep a low profile.

A bowl of hot popcorn arrived, and was passed across the rooftop to Chloe.

“Thank you, Mrs S.”

Chloe munched popcorn anxiously, and watched newscopters vie for Hollywood airspace with newly-arrived military gunships – whose machine guns seemed to either run out of ammo or jam almost hilariously quickly, and much faster than Chloe had been led to believe by watching her boyfriend play computer games. And, of course, the Karamel Kaiju didn’t seem to care, and continued rending and splattering Capitol Records with goo until it had damaged the building to its satisfaction. Then Chloe spat out her popcorn in alarm.

“Shit! It’s heading south! Give me your car keys!” She told Eris.

The antiquarian sighed. There was no way he was letting Chloe do this without responsible supervision. “No. I’ll drive.”

 

* *

 

“Um. Colonel Chloe Southern, with the, um. Florida National Guard...”

Eris rolled his eyes while keeping his hands calmly on his steering wheel, in the hope that the stressed out cops running a road block on the Santa Monica Boulevard outside Trejo’s Coffee and Donuts wouldn’t decide to shoot him. Chloe had taken it into her head to talk her way past the road block, with the aid of hypnotic magic. Unfortunately, the blonde nineteen year old had clearly let her mind-control powers go to her head, and she’d unwisely told the various different police officers who took an interest in turning Eris’ car back to Beverly Hills that she was: (a) Chloe Southern, FBI, rank unknown, (b) Captain Chloe Southern, US Marines, and, most recently, (c) Colonel Chloe Southern, Florida National Guard. The problem with mind control magic was that every one of Chloe’s claims was believed wholeheartedly by the person she was talking to – but she had been sufficiently specific that she’d prompted her victims to helpfully radio their control room to ask permission from the various agencies she’d claimed to work for. And the over-powered sorceress was growing dangerously frustrated with waiting. Eris could see a metallic sheen over Chloe’s skin, and the green sparks dripping from her impatient fingertips.

“I’m sorry, Colonel. You’ll have to bear with us.”

“Come on!” Chloe yelled at the chunky police officer – named Captain Hogg – with a donut-stained shirt. “There’s like fifty different agencies half a mile that way, and I’ve told you I’m with three of them! Just lemme past!”

“Sorry, Colonel. It’s a fucking mess tonight. No-one’s answering anything. And I’ve just been told to keep everyone back from that, that... Thing.” Said Hogg, trembling at the last part.

“The Karamel Kaiju?” Chloe asked.

Officer Hogg looked relieved that someone seemed to know something. “Ah. Karamel Kaiju? Sounds like the name of a donut! Hehe!”

“Well it’s not.”

“Well. Ahem, no Ma’am. I suppose not.”

Chloe looked miserable.

Oddly enough, Chloe looking unhappy seemed to move Officer Hogg to greater helpfulness than any number of federal or military ranks.

“It’ll be alright, Ma’am.”

“No it won’t!” Chloe yelled back tearfully. “My parents live like half a mile ahead of that Kaiju. And you won’t let me go blow it up!”

Officer Hogg looked thoughtful. Eris suspected it was the look of a man who was considering, for the first time in a decade or two, using some initiative of his own.

“I can let you through, Ma’am. But, please be careful!”

Chloe looked confused for a moment. “Um. Yay... Hey, Eris: drive!”

Ahead, Santa Monica Boulevard grew slippery, its surface flooded with a slick of caramel sauce. Eris took a right, and soon drew up on a new road, some few hundred yards south of the Kaiju.

“Right! Finally.” Chloe climbed out onto the street. “I’m gonna nuke it with Green Lightning, then hit it with the Azure Flame. And if that doesn’t work, maybe a concentrated earthquake, to suck it down into the ground!”

“Wait, Chloe.” Eris pleaded. “Can you please try something first that doesn’t involve mass destruction in central LA?”

“Mmm.” Chloe frowned. “I’m out of ideas. And I’m not letting that thing smash my neighbourhood. Cosmic Horrors can’t have it. I grew up here. But... I am open to ideas.”

“Okay.” Eris sighed.

“So, what’s your plan?”

“Um.”

“Waiting patiently.” Chloe said impatiently.

Ahead of them, a new military truck arrived in order to pointlessly empty a few belts of minigun ammo into the Karamel Kaiju, before driving off – just too late to avoid being encased by a ten ton ball of liquid caramel, detached from the Kaiju’s hand and hurled a hundred yards.

“Waiting patiently. That thing's a hundred fifty yards away. We’re in throwing range, Eris, and do you wanna find out if my force field spell stops caramel?”

“Okay, okay. Wait a minute.” Eris wracked his brain for useful knowledge.

“Hundred and forty yards. But I think it’s stopped to eat a donut stand. Nope... Green Lightning time!”

“No! Wait! Have you seen a film called the Blob?”

“No! Summary!” Chloe yelled back, as she concentrated on crushing a fistful of green electrical arcs into a ball of nuclear fire.

“They freeze it!”

Chloe made a pained expression. “Shit! That’s pretty clever. Okay...”

Eris had no idea how Chloe could handle two city-shaking spells at once, and he resolved not to ask. She transferred the ball of pent-up green energy to her left hand, and squashed back out of existence at the same time as her eyes changed to a solid ice white. And the winter night grew suddenly bitter, Arctic cold.

A wind began to howl, as Chloe’s spell tortured the air mass over Los Angeles into a different form. A blizzard. It took moments.

“Hundred ten yards. Get in the car, Chloe.” Eris said.

“How cold? Don’t skid!” Chloe yelled, as she complied.

“No idea! Um, Arctic cold?”

“Okay!” Chloe breath misted as she replied. “Hope the LA Source feels like letting me have a leetle snowstorm...”

Eris slammed his car into reverse, and tried not to crash into any of the debris in his way on the suddenly glassy road.”

 

*

 

Cold.

It was damn cold.

At some point, Eris had driven madly backwards through a hedge onto a golf course. The groundsman of Wilshire Country Club was unlikely to be happy about the tracks cut through the frozen ground on half a dozen fairways. But he would be less happy about the hundred-foot tall, ten-thousand-ton caramel icicle that had finally slowed to a halt and frozen to glass on the eleventh green.

“I think we got it!” Chloe said, as she helped a shaken Eris climb out of his car, which, after his luck ran out in the dark and ice, he’d finally reversed into a bunker.

“Yeah. You okay?”

“Yep.” Chloe replied happily. “Arctic blizzard over LA subtle enough for you, Mr Subtle?”

“Better than a magic nuke.”

“Mmm. Guess so. Are we gonna have to explain this?” Chloe queried out loud.

“Um. Well, my car’s stuck in a bunker, but I can honestly claim we were fleeing the Kaiju! And I don’t think you actually did anything that looked... Magick-y.”

“I may have shattered some cameras, just in case.” Chloe admitted sheepishly.

“Good! Then I think we should go home. It’s fucking freezing, and the city’s a mess so I'm afraid we’ll have to walk five miles in the cold...”

“Nope!” Chloe replied happily.

Eris sighed. “No, Chloe. You can’t summon a monster to ride home; and no more mind controlling police officers – until you learn to lie properly.”

“Oh, I wasn’t thinking of that.” Chloe chirped.

“What, then?”

The blonde pointed along a road.

“My folks live five minutes that way. You can sleep on the sofa.”

 

* *

 

EPILOGUE

 

Eris set to work on the New York Times with a pair of scissors and a jar of glue for his scrapbook.

“Robotic movie monster malfunctions and runs amok in Hollywood! Hundreds of cops and National Guard fattened by exposure to sugary prop gunge. Mayor promises free gym membership for victims! Security experts blame Russian hacking.”

“Freak blizzard blankets LA in Arctic conditions, due to Global Warming! The case for a hundred trillion dollars of green spending is now unanswerable, say top boffins.”

“Day of Gluttony in California blamed on subliminal advertising. Congressman demands federal regulation of junk food ads.”

The warlock sighed with relief. There was every sign the authorities were as pig ignorant today as they’d always been in the past, and so Eris could continue his antiquarian study of the mystic arts in peace. Still the Sarnath Chocolates connection was worrying. He’d have to look into them. Perhaps he could start by buying Rebeca a weekly subscription box...

 

* * *

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So I was gone on vacation for Christmas and didn’t check up on these for a week. I shrugged it off, believing there to be at most one update and a lot of insightful comments.

”It’s @flyer33” I thought. “I know his pace...”

Chloe Southern got obese.

”...oh”

There is a giant chocolate demon in LA.

”... oh my shit. I just turned my attention away for a week!”

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5 minutes ago, >_< 0_0 said:

Chloe Southern got obese.

”...oh”

She's not obese. She's extra-fluffy!

5 minutes ago, >_< 0_0 said:

There is a giant chocolate demon in LA.

Yes. Yes there was. AND an ill-defined but implied-to-be large % of Californians gained around fifty pounds due to the Gluttony of Fattara, which I probably ought to bear in mind in future continuity. Though I can see myself forgetting "... The reigning Ms Los Angeles had never weighed over 120 lbs before in her life, and had never, ever overindulged..."

10 minutes ago, >_< 0_0 said:

”It’s @flyer33” I thought. “I know his pace...”

 

Wonder what you think of Demigods and Diets...

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