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>_< 0_0

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About >_< 0_0

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  • Birthday 01/10/1994
  • Location Stafford, VA, USA

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    Drawing, writing, reading, hiking, driving, video games, clubbing, drinking, history, philosophy, foreign policy, nuclear technology, military stuff -- and chicks.

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  1. For every plan, there are at least three unforeseen circumstances 😬🏃‍♂️💨 Chapter Thirty-One The sun was beginning to set; the window’s outline stretched longer across the soft carpet in Emily’s dorm room. I sat cross-legged against her bed, trying my best to appear as if I had never been in her room before. “And when I looked down, my stomach was even bigger,” Emily rubbed her abs as she described her fluctuating weight. “Wow,” I stretched my arms over my head innocently. “That’s… absolutely insane! What’s causing that?” “I can’t say for sure,” Emily frowned at the carpet before looking back at me. “Besides Brooke just picking on me. When she first started doing this… I was so devastated. I had no idea what to do – I couldn’t bear letting anyone see me with my belly hanging-out so much – so I just lay on my bed and kind of fell asleep.” “You just slept?” her answer confused me. “I was crying a little,” she shrugged. “But yeah. What else could I do? Skip dinner? Anyway, here’s what’s crazy about all this: I had this dream. Someone came and visited me. She started talking about how I was worried about nothing and that I would be alright. That’s when I felt my stomach shrinking. I woke up and it was flat again.” She lifted her shirt to gawk in awe at her flat abs again before looking up. “Jane, I don’t think that was any ordinary dream.” Of course, I knew the real reason she had lost weight, but it wouldn’t hurt to play along. “So… you were visited in a dream? Who was it?” “I thought it might have been a guardian angel, but now I’m not so sure,” Emily shrugged. “It was one of those dreams where you can’t really remember what they said.” “So it wasn’t Jesus?” “Please. Jesus doesn’t care about my stomach; he has more important things to worry about.” “So who was it?” “I shouldn’t have mentioned it. It might mean something, it might not. What I do know is this: Brooke’s definitely behind all this. Like, she lives in the next room! I can actually hear her scheming in there sometimes! One time, she was trying to figure out how her powers worked and accidentally… um…” “I’m listening,” I glanced nervously towards the wall, worried that Brooke might be home. “You saw Brooke in the showers,” she gestured vaguely. “You remember how she used to be… a little more balanced-out?” “That was weird,” I replied. “Exactly! Well, I was here when that happened! She and Mary were in there arguing when Brooke somehow wished her… her fat into Mary.” “So that’s what’s going on.” “Yes! I know it sounds crazy, but you’ve seen what’s happening lately, right?” “People are getting fatter,” I nodded. “Thinner too, but mostly fatter.” “And it’s mostly people who are close to Brooke! You see? I don’t know how or why, but Brooke has gained the power to shift her weight from herself to others, and she has no problems using it.” “But that doesn’t quite explain why you lost weight. Also, what’s making Brooke gain weight? No one can eat that much so fast.” “It’s a curse,” Emily said matter-of-factly. “She can force her weight onto people around her, but she’s always rapidly gaining.” “Ah.” “So what made you come to me?” Emily asked. “You said you were looking for me, remember?” I took a deep breath, collecting the thoughts I needed to craft the story I had been forming in the back of my head as I listened to Emily before closing my eyes and leaning my head against the side of her mattress. “Jason is in trouble,” I said sombrely, opening my eyes to find her gawking at me. “What? What’s going on with him?” “I’m not exactly sure,” I bit my lip. “But he texted me last night, telling me he was being framed – that he needed help. By the time I reached his room, the police had cordoned everything off. Jason’s missing.” “Oh my God,” Emily squeezed herself tight. “Girls in the cheer squad were gloating about him getting in trouble… I should’ve been with him.” “He mentioned you,” I continued. “Said that you’d noticed people gaining and losing weight too. See, that’s why I was looking for you. This is way over my head – both of ours, actually – and we got to stick together and figure out what’s going on.” “Do you know where Jason went?” The question surprised me, even as I knew its answer. “No.” “Do you know where he might be hiding?” I shook my head. “I think there’s something huge going on, and we’ve barely scratched the surface. Jason is definitely caught in the middle of it. If we can figure out what’s going on, we can get Jason back. He can’t be that far away. After all, this island isn’t that big.” “Yeah, I think you’re right,” Emily sighed heavily. “It’s just this is all so terrifying. Like, you’ve never felt your stomach just swelling up, but it’s really strange. It’s almost impossible to not notice it growing when it happens that quickly. When it happened to me, I thought I was going to explode,” she chuckled nervously. “But it was just fat. Fat can’t hurt you.” “I guess,” I shifted nervously. “So… I wanted to ask you something.” “What is it?” “Can I sleep here?” Emily frowned, looking at the single bed in the room behind me. “Why do you ask?” “I don’t feel safe,” I pursed my lips nervously. “If I was with you, then maybe…?” “Brooke’s in that room right there,” Emily pointed at the wall. “What if we just slept in your room instead?” I felt my face flushing red. “Uh… no, my room isn’t safe. Not safe at all. I keep getting picked on by the prefects.” “So do I.” “You too?” I fidgeted. “Well, it’s not just that. Jason was a really close friend of mine, and when the police started going after him, I didn’t know what to do anymore. He was my only friend, so I have no one to turn to for support or advice anymore – except you.” “But I only have one bed,” Emily replied. “Do you have a spare blanket? I could wrap myself in that… could I stay just one night, at least? Just so I can calm down and sleep?” “Well, if you think it will help, then sure. I got a quilt that I don’t use.” “Oh, thank you Emily! Thank you!” Sleeping in a quilt is not hard, but finding the perfect position to sleep is. After a few hours of contorting myself across the carpet, I eventually sidled myself between the wall and the desk and managed to fall asleep. Sleep came to me in brief, uncounted moments, as I struggled to ignore the slightest discomforts that interfered with my dreams. The dreams blended with reality, until I could not tell if I was trying to sleep, or dreaming it. Then I got thirsty. Ignoring the dryness in my throat was no use. As I shifted my head to the side, I wondered when I had last drunk anything – I hadn’t since the cup of coffee from the police department, and before that was the half-finished bottle of Jack. Christ, that was double dehydration; no wonder I felt like a raisin. But I didn’t want to get up; that would abandon the warmth I’d accumulated in the quilt wrapped around me. Half an hour later, I gave up trying to sleep through the thirst. Grumbling, I slowly rose to my feet, careful to keep the quilt wrapped around my body. I could hear Emily stirring against her bedsheets in the darkness. With a creeping-shuffle, I managed to reach the door and slide into the dark hallway. Now then, where was the water fountain? I had studied in the lobby before; I remembered there being a fountain there, and I headed for that. When I reached the spacious room, stars were shining through the windows, just enough to shine against the leather sofas and chairs. The metal tray of the water fountain gleamed faintly against a far wall; I approached it while huddling my quilt close. Extending a hand out of the warmth of the quilt, I activated the fountain and knelt to sip the cold, delicious water. “What are you doing?” I froze in place. The water stopped flowing, but the built-in AC kicked in with a deafening hum. “Who’s that?” “What the hell are you doing? It’s, like, two in the morning.” “I got thirsty…” Whoever was in the room with me groaned in response, though I wasn’t sure if she was frustrated with me, stretching herself awake, or both. Squinting, I could see that she was sitting in a chair on the far side of the room. “Great,” she sighed. “The prefects will be coming any second now. Why couldn’t you use the bathroom sink?” “Wait, why are the prefects coming?” “I dunno, maybe because it’s past curfew?” “What?” I whispered frantically. “What are you doing here?” “I just fell asleep studying…” Both of us started when we heard footsteps from down the hall. Without a word, we scrambled for cover like rats. “Who’s in here?” the prefect’s voice echoed off the walls. “I swear to God, if you’re Jason, I’ll pepper-spray you! I’m ready!” Lucky for me, the prefect was approaching from a different hallway, and I was able to run for the safety of Emily’s door. Sighing with relief, I twisted the knob – which didn’t budge. I had locked myself out! “Shit,” I shook my hands under my quilt. “Shit, shit, shit…” Should I just knock? “What is…?” light beamed against my quilt, spreading shadows across the wall. “Who is that?” Panicking, I sprinted for safety. “You come back! Get back here!” It was good that I still had all my clothes on, otherwise running would be more difficult. By the wobbling light shining from the prefect’s phone, I could see the turns I had to make. The exit was before me, a mere ten feet away… “Got you!” Out of the darkness, another prefect had been lying in wait. I screamed as she snagged her fingers against my quilt. Faint memories of my high school Sports and Activities class resurfaced, and I twisted around her groping grip to slam into the front door and escape into the night – touchdown. “That’s right, keep running you stupid freshman!” the prefects called from the doorway. “And don’t you come back! We know who you are!” the other added. But it was impossible for them to know who I was; and I couldn’t help but grin. Turning for the shelter of a winding park path, I leaped over a stray wooden bench, quilt billowing behind me like a giant cape. I was free! They would never take me alive! Several hours later, I was knocking on Emily’s door again. She opened it a crack, leaning into view wearing a large T-shirt and not much else. “Jane?” she frowned. “Oh my god, Jane! What happened to you?” “Hi,” I said awkwardly, tugging a leaf out of my hair. “You’re filthy! How did you get mud on your face?” “I fell.” “Where? In the pond?” “Uh… by the way, I brought your quilt back.” “I see that,” Emily eyed the dusty quilt in my arms. “Well, come in before anyone sees you. You can tell me more when you’re washed-up.” "Also... do you have any water?"
  2. Colors of Autumn? I haven’t seen this yet.
  3. I had to google "Chubby Checker," but yes! That's my intent! The weight gain is most important, of course, and there will be huge amounts of that 😝 I have decided to call her "Jane" from now on because it's less confusing... or maybe not...
  4. >_< 0_0

    Rihanna

    Not to mention an excellent taste in fancy clothes not seen since Louis XIV 👑💍
  5. Uhhhhnnnn… hey, I'm back! You guys wouldn't believe all the things I've been doing lately! I just got this excellent apartment (with a pool!), plus I've been doing loads of classwork and all, but I STILL managed to get a new chapter up! 😖 I really did miss writing this stuff; hopefully I get to write faster now. Chapter Thirty “I’m going to Central Hall to get to the bottom of this,” Zoltan said finally. For the past few, uncounted moments, I’d shamelessly clung to her, stifling sobs and sniffling as I slowly came to my senses. When I lifted my head to look into her round, inviting eyes, I spotted the clock on the wall. Had it really just been a mere three minutes? It felt like twenty. “Come on,” Zoltan patted my back. “Let’s finish this day strong. Do you need anything from me?” As we picked ourselves up from our seats, I couldn’t help but gawk at Zoltan’s height compared to mine. Being over six feet, she had already been slightly taller than me, but as I stood next to her in my shrunken, feminine form, she loomed overhead, breasts jutting straight towards me at eye-level. “Um…” I swallowed, craning my neck to meet her gaze. “I think I’m going to be okay.” “Good. We’ll talk, alright?” she nodded confidently. “Come back sometime and we’ll talk.” “Alright,” I said as she began leaving. “And Zoltan?” “Yes? Call me Tracey.” “I think you’re the best coach – I mean it. It shouldn’t matter if you’re bulking or cutting. I’m sure you can coach the cheer squad again. I’m absolutely positive they’ll put you back in soon.” “Maybe they will.” “Also… my name is Jane.” “Alright Jane,” she patted the doorframe while bending back to look at me. “Be seeing you soon.” Zoltan left, and I was alone again. Standing in the midst of her office, I shrugged and folded my arms together as I stared absent-mindedly at her various trophies, team flags, and pictures of teams she had coached. One picture in particular drew my attention, a photo of last year’s basketball team, with dozens of grinning girls lined-up holding all the awards they had won for the season. Zoltan sat cross-legged front-and-centre, beaming with her rock-hard abs bared and shining in the sunlight. I sighed, composed enough to not cry again, but still overcome by sadness. It was my fault that Zoltan was fired as coach. Before I knew her, I had just seen her as another mean, imposing staff member that I could use to rack-up poundage and fatten the cheer squad with. Now I was realizing she was one of the greatest women I had ever met, and I had put her through so much hardship, all because of my own sexual desires and lust for vengeance. Was making random girls gain weight wrong? People I cared about were getting caught in the crossfire, and while I struggled to make things right again, things kept getting worse. Hell, I’d lost everything at this point – even my own body. Was it right to keep going? I had to keep going. Stopping now wouldn’t get me my old body back, and it sure as hell wouldn’t earn me any friends. I would’ve been framed for something whether or not I had the fattening app or not; it was only a matter of time before the Dean, Brooke, Mary, or most anyone else would’ve found an excuse to get rid of me forever. The fattening app wasn’t a perfect tool, but no tool came without some amount of risk. Early cavemen singed and burned themselves learning how to wield fire and roast their meat. The fattening app was my only flame as I braved the frigid winds that were Biltmore College, and I would shiver and starve to death if I let it grow cold. Confident with myself, I turned away from the picture and left Zoltan’s office. I would use my fattening app to get Zoltan her job back, and find shelter in the meantime. I stood before the locker room’s plain entrance with a pounding heart. Moments ago, I had decided that I would have to go inside to complete my mission, but now that I had arrived, there were so many excuses not to enter, and every single one of them were spinning in my head. Then a pair of snickering girls entered, snickering to each other as they bumped into me. “Um, excuse me?” I asked shyly. They stopped snickering as they edged past me. “Huh?” One of them loomed two inches over my diminutive height. “Who are you?” “I’m Jane,” I grimaced, instinctively worried that they would think I was a Peeping-Tom. “Is… is Emily in there?” “Yeah?” she said as they began to edge past. “Can I talk to her?” “Sure,” she squeezed her face into a bewildered grimace, making a show of her reaction to the situation. “Can you tell her that --?” “She’s right in there,” she turned and walked away from me. As she passed the front desk and left the building, I saw her friend lean over and giggle gossip into her ear. I turned my attention back to the locker room door. “Great,” I slapped my arms against my thighs with exasperation. “I can’t just go in there… I’m not a girl. Not really.” “Hey,” the girl at the front desk leaned over to look at me. “You need any help?” “Crap,” I muttered. “What was that?” “Uh, no. I don’t need any help!” I called over my shoulder as I pushed against the swinging door. “I was just putting on lipstick!” “Lipstick?” “Yeah. Girl things, you know?” I was standing in the girl’s locker room now, amidst at least a dozen girls milling about from lockers lining one wall to the showers in the opposite corner. I gaped at the sight of half-dressed girls in all directions. It was like nothing I ever imagined! Actually, it wasn’t as kinky as I thought it would be. This was nothing compared to what happened in the men’s locker room at my old high school. This was just a few girls talking with each other as they slipped their jeans and sweaters back on. I’d seen more flesh on the beaches in summertime. Relieved that I wouldn’t have to come to terms with the naked, female form, I moved inside to find my friend… Oh no, there was someone in the showers! I shielded my gaze before realizing that the woman under the steaming, cascading water was still clothed in a bikini, then let my arm drop. She was a voluptuous individual, with wide hips, a rounded ass, and… surprisingly small tits, but mostly she was bulging with femininity as she ran her hands absentmindedly through her wavy blonde mane. It was Brooke, I realized as my blood chilled. As she pushed her dampened locks off her shoulders, she suddenly glared in my direction before I could hide. “Wait your turn!” she hastily angled her deflated chest away from me. “Sorry!” I waved my arms apologetically while trying not to let my eyes dwell on her soft, bulging ass, which oozed its way around her bikini bottom, each cheek hanging heavily over thickened thighs. “I’m sorry!” She stared suspiciously over her shoulder at me, eyelashes fluttering like agitated wasps. “Who are you?” “Me?” I stood stupidly in place, unsure if it was safe to answer. A strange smile streaked across her mouth as she continued to stare at me. “So what do you think, huh? You think I’m fat?” “No!” I said as my body throbbed with adrenaline. “Well, I think you’re fat,” she replied coolly. “I think you’re –” Someone rushed to my side and grabbed my arm. When I turned to look, I found Emily by my side, meeting Brooke’s gaze confidently. “Emily!” I sighed with relief. She gave me a perplexed look before returning her attention to our common foe. Brooke was visibly-shook by Emily’s appearance. “What are you doing here?” she asked as she turned her chest further away. “You can’t hurt her,” Emily said confidently as she nervously dug her grip into the flesh of my arm. When Brooke didn’t answer right away, it emboldened Emily. “Yeah, that’s right. I know what you’re doing, and you know you have no power over me.” “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Brooke sneered. “Come on,” Emily whispered in my ear as she pushed me towards the back of the locker room. “Where are we going?” I asked as she pulled me past shirtless girls by my wrist. “What was that about?” “You wouldn’t believe me if I told you,” she replied in hushed tones. “That girl is dangerous. You just have to trust me.” “I trust you,” I said quickly, nearly slipping on the wet linoleum floor. “My name’s Emily, by the way,” Emily introduced herself. We were now in the furthest corner of the locker room, far enough from the other girls to have a private conversation. At last, she let go of my wrist and faced me. The look in her eyes, bordering on feral in their intensity, gave me strange chills. Was this the same timid, Christian girl I had met so long ago? “By the way, who are you? I’ve never seen you before.” “Um… I’m Jane. Nice to meet you,” I dumbly held my hand out for a handshake before withdrawing it to swish my hair awkwardly over my shoulder. Emily rested her hands on her hips thoughtfully as she chose her next words carefully. “Okay… what I’m going to tell you might not make sense, but something’s going on around here. I’m not sure how to explain it because I don’t quite understand it either…” It was then that I suddenly saw my chance to gain her trust and confidence. “Random people are getting fat and thin again?” Emily’s mouth hung wide open. “How did you…?” “Emily,” with a burst of confidence that came out of nowhere, I leaned forward and clasped her small, slender hands in mine. “I’ve been looking for you.”
  6. It’s just too good to be true, isn’t it? Two sorceresses succumbing to gluttony? Something is afoot 🤨 I can sense it.
  7. I think the worst thing that could happen is some mouth-breather just text-rants something like "you so sexy as big come to curvage for make fatter glorious I love plz." At that point, the worst thing a girl might do is rant at curvage to take the photos down, but if she's a celebrity, there's no legal premise to remove public photos, otherwise the paparazzi industry would not exist. We also got some good moderator/bouncers that send troublemakers out the door pretty good.
  8. Actually, I think it's the curvage dudes doing the sneaking... on their social media. Sometimes someone gets too horny, posts a rogue comment, and nearly reveals his secret identity by accident.
  9. Zoltan? I'd have guessed Candace was the best because there's more detail to her (so far), unless you mean Zoltan's hotter? Yeah, she is 😄 Jason has charm? I guess he was charming as a man in some way or... oh, you mean Zoltan! Yeah, the cheer squad pound-counterfeiting scheme is busted; Jason will need to figure that out soon. Also, I have decided the technical term is "pound catalyst" Swahili is actually British, so I think his first-world problem would be Brexit or something like that. This is an interesting train of thought. Jason has done something similar to this already by shifting weight from the cheer-squad to Zoltan, then through Emily and into Brooke, who promptly stuffs it into Emily again only for Jason to quickly shove it all into Mary and then split half of it into Karen... ooh, that's pretty complicated. Maybe I'll draw all this into a simple diagram to make it understandable for everyone. There are some limitations on what Jason can do. Some of them are pretty clear, but others are not, I guess. For one thing, he has to level up a couple times to earn one hex, which has to be: (1) directed at one person (though it can affect multiple people through that person), (2) directly relate to the weight of that person (meaning he has no power over inanimate objects), (3) limited by the weight stored in his account as well as the weight "invested" in others, (4) and additionally, may be cancelled in the apps "hex menu" (which he hasn't bothered to do yet), though this does not give him another hex to use. So the basic challenge for him at this point is to create a "closed circuit" like he did with the cheer squad that allows him to wrack-up huge gains in a short amount of time. However, as we now see, there's a distinctly human, emotional element as well. If he has feelings for certain characters, that will screw with the closed circuit. Also, he doesn't want to get caught, so he has to keep a low profile as best he can.
  10. Alcohol makes the world, like, five times as exciting 😛
  11. The idea of Triss having freckles all over her cleavage wasn’t something I’d ever thought of, but the more I think about it, the more it makes perfect sense — and it’s surprisingly sexy 😘
  12. A real quick chapter while I bounce around between offices (one of which was in the Pentagon 0_0). We confirm that Jane is a real bitch 🤨 and also me, because I almost shed a tear writing this scene 😥 Chapter Twenty-Nine But even with my new phone in hand, I was still just as lost as I had been. I had no shelter, and even using my meal card would get me in trouble. Though I had $500 in my pocket, I only wanted to spend it when I absolutely had to. Dwelling deep in the woods was also out of the question, for if the deer ticks didn’t find me, people would, and start asking questions. The police officer Julia had nailed it: the island was small. Being a bum would simply not do. I needed to stay with someone… The thought paused all others in my mind. To stay with someone else on campus. A woman. My shoulders shivered at the thought, and my breath stilled in my throat. To be sharing a room with a girl thrilled and terrified me in equal measure, to the point that I had to lean against the nearest clothes rack and blink at the ceiling. How would I even begin to make this work? I was hardly able to speak to women, much less convince them to co-ed. Who would want to live with me? But I wasn’t me. I was Jane Wick, and Jane Wick was also a girl. There was no inexplicable hatred for me, no bias toward my gender. I was just another girl, and a small, harmless-looking one at that. It was a tremendous epiphany. Yes, I was a girl now, and it still made me feel awkward and uncomfortable, but perhaps I could be likeable now, or loved, even. I looked down past my modest breasts towards the gap between my legs and sighed. Love might still be impossible. So close, yet so far… The sound of Mary arguing with Karen the retail clerk in hushed tones refocused my mind to matters at hand. I still needed to find someone to live with, if only for a night. But who? I thought of everyone I knew, and suddenly the answer was there, hiding in plain sight. Confident with my next move, I walked out of the clothing section, bumped past the two slightly-chubby girls, and left the store. It was time to go back to the sports building. When I entered the sports building, a random girl was working at the front desk. “Good morning,” she said politely. I froze in place, frowning. “Huh?” “How are you?” she lifted her head, smiling slightly. Was this what it was like to be normal? I was so used to everyone hating me on sight that I had grown used to it, yet now instead of being challenged the right to even enter the building, I was being told ‘good morning?’ How was I supposed to answer that? “Oh, um…” I smiled. “You look good today.” “Thanks,” she beamed as she brushed a lock of hair behind her head. “You do too.” My breath caught in my throat as my eyes flared with a surge of passion. Could it be? The warmth of human interaction that had been denied me all this time? This smiling girl in front of me, bestowing upon me polite, friendly words, all because… Because I was a girl too. The warm, fuzzy feeing beginning to well-up from within my heart chilled as quickly as it had come. It was all so superficial. Was it really my looks that made all the difference? My gender? I remembered trying to argue with her for permission just to enter the building last week. It was so unfair! “So what are you up to?” she asked. “Need any help finding something?” “Uh… actually, can you tell me if the cheer squad is practicing today?” “Ooh,” she shook her head. “You just missed their practice session. They’re in the locker room right now,” she pointed back behind her. “You hear that? They’re still showering.” “That’s alright,” I waved my hands frantically, quivering with fear and excitement at the thought of entering. “I don’t need to go in there… but I was, uh… wondering where their coach was?” I asked the question instinctively, pondering my chances of seeing Zoltan again, even if she wouldn’t know who I was. “Their new coach or old one?” My already-chilled heart froze solid. “What? Zoltan’s not coaching anymore? Why?” “Couldn’t you tell? She gained so much weight? And then some of the cheerleaders started getting fat too, so the staff decided…” “Where is she? I need to see her!” “In her office? It’s across from the gym…” “Thanks. I gotta go, but…” I spawned a 5-pound bomb in my pocket and began to hand it to her. “Can you eat this toffee? It’s not my favourite flavour.” “Okay?” she said slowly. “I’ll take it. Sure.” As soon as her fingers plucked the fattening treat from my own, I turned away and strode my way towards Zoltan’s office as fast as my short, little legs could take me. When I reached her office, the door was open and I rushed in recklessly. “Hello? Zoltan? Where are –” “I’m here,” she said firmly from behind. Jumping, I twisted back to see that her desk was situated by the wall nearest the door, so that she had the full view of the far windows to enjoy – and myself to glare at. Her eyes burned into mine as she reclined against her office chair. Her belly had shrank considerably, so that there was barely an outward bulge to it anymore, but from the size of her melon-sized breasts, I could tell that she still had some weight to shed. “You’re supposed to knock,” she pointed at me sternly. “I’m sorry ma’am,” I fidgeted awkwardly. “I’ll go outside and try again…” “You’re good,” Zoltan smiled suddenly as she waved her hand dismissively. “What’s up? Go ahead and have a seat if you want.” All my sense of urgency drained away as I stared into her beautiful eyes, her warm smile soothing my worries away. “Okay,” I sat in the nearest chair, which happened to be on the same side of the desk as her. “How are you doing? How can I help you?” With a deep breath, I opened my heart. “I just heard you weren’t coaching the cheer squad anymore.” “That fast, huh?” Zoltan stared down her torso absentmindedly. “Yes. I’m taking some time off to get into shape.” “But you are in shape!” I felt my anxiety returning, spurred by my sense of guilt. “You’re the strongest person I know! Why would they do this to you?” “That’s real nice to hear,” Zoltan grinned softly, but froze when she saw my expression. “Are you okay?” Suddenly beyond words, I shook my head, trying my very best to hold back tears. Zoltan leaned closer, gauging my emotions before reaching across her desk to pull a tissue from its box and hand it to me. “You don’t have to say anything,” Zoltan said softly as I tried to hide my face into the soft paper. For a moment that lasted far too long, I couldn’t say anything even if I wanted to, but as my eyes welled with water, I began to recover just enough to slowly raise my gaze up towards her again. The tears distorted my vision of her, and she shimmered like a mirage just out of reach. “You’re so good at what you do,” I moaned. “When I first saw you, I was almost terrified at how tough you looked, but you’re… a good person too… you don’t deserve…” “It’s all good, girl,” Zoltan leaned closer, elbows resting against her knees. “This will all work out. I wasn’t supposed to be teaching gym and coaching two teams. Hey. This just means I got more time to work out, right?” “But it’s so wrong…” I shook my head at the floor. “I don’t want bad things to… to happen to…” I paused when I felt her long, smooth hand on my shoulder. She had rolled her chair closer to mine, and stared into my eyes so confidently, it was as if nothing was wrong. “Don’t worry about me. There’s plenty of people going through so much worse. Life is going to be hard, okay? Just make sure you’re harder. That way, you can help others having trouble with life. You hear me? Hey. Look at me for a second.” I lifted my head above the cover of the tissue and blinked tears from my eyes to see her leaning forward, close enough that our foreheads nearly touched. “You’re a good person, alright? You remind me of someone, you know. He felt pretty lost too, but instead of running away from his problems, he confronted them head-on…” “Jason?” I gasped suddenly. She smiled slightly. “I can’t say… well okay, you do remind me of him somehow. Hey… he’s not as bad as all that. Don’t believe some of the rumours these girls are throwing around; I’m sure if you get to know him, you’ll find that he’s…” I broke down at that point, bending down and shaking under her assuring grip as tears fell everywhere. I felt her rest her other hand over my shoulder as I failed to come to terms with reality. “Hey…” she gripped my shoulders. “He’s gone!” I wailed. “They framed him and now he’s gone!” “What are you talking about?” Zoltan lifted my head softly, concern in her voice. “Talk to me… what happened?” That only made it worse. Here I was, right next to one of the greatest women I’d ever met, who had always helped me when I needed it, and even now was telling me she admired me in some way, and yet we had never been so far apart. I had lost her as much as I had lost myself. Then I leaned forward and hugged her. I was barely sitting on my chair now, and I had to grip her tight to keep from falling. The sensation of her firm, coiled muscles, coated in a silken layer of softness was the most intimate sensation I had ever felt in my life. As I squeezed her, she squeezed back, leaning her soft body into mine as I muffled my sobs into her shoulder. It was technically everything I’d ever dreamed of doing with her, and I never felt so alone. “It’s going to be okay,” she rubbed my back with one hand while wrapping her other around my ribs. “You can tell me anything you want, if you need to.” I needed to. I desperately needed to tell someone – anyone – everything. But I couldn’t, so I kept doing my best to stop crying, sniffing as quietly as I could in her strong embrace. I’m not sure how long we rocked against each other.
  13. This is starting to get real, real good 😍
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