ES-Draws

My top recommendation? Match Lifestyles not Kinks. They may not be a feedee. But are they a foodie? Are they happiest watching movies on the couch? Do they prefer dinner dates to hikes? Active fitness girls aren't going to want to gain weight. But a lazy foodie might find that idea liberating. Connect with people who already live the feedee lifestyle, even if they aren't one.

I’ve done a lot of reading on this, and the short answer is that we don’t really know where fetishes come from. But if you ask around this community, you’ll get a lot of interesting answers. Some people definitely feel it was due to how they were raised. Things like having a fat mentor, having food as a sign of love, or being teased for being fat are all things I’ve heard before. Some people get into Feedism later in life as a way to take control and feel empowered. A lot of folks say they gained weight and learned to like it, or were exposed to this by a partner and got into it themselves. Some people even use this fetish as an act of rebellion against societal norms. And a lot of people feel it’s an ingrained part of their sexuality. There are lots of stories of people saying they’ve been into this fetish for as long as they can remember. People talk about stuffing pillows in their clothes as a child, or feeling “weird” when talking about gaining weight. For me? It feels 100% biological. I’ve known fatness was appealing to me before I even hit puberty, and when I did, I was attracted to fat before anything else. It’s just as strong as any other part of my sexuality. I can’t think of any childhood experiences that could have caused me to feel this way, and I have no idea why I like what I do. It just feels innate.

Look they might not be your type, but it seems kinda hypocritical to say some fat people look gross when we're all here because we get off to what 95% of other people find disgusting.

This was my own experience. Although I am thin now, I used to be around 240 lbs and pushing obese. I really didn’t mind being fat, except I didn’t like my own weight distribution. I wanted to have a “bear” body - think beer belly combined with a strong frame. But instead I was just kind of… shapeless. I felt like being fat didn’t flatter me, while now that I’m thin, I feel much more confident. Ultimately I think what matters most is how people feel about their body, at whatever weight! We all have different tastes and preferences. But first and foremost, I think anyone, fat or thin, should feel confident in their figure.

This is very hard*, but at least in the bedroom, it starts with making it enjoyable for her. Not just for you. For example, does she have kinks herself? If she's submissive, try to incorporate feeding in a dom/sub context , and she's likely to be a lot more into it! If she likes being praised, keep telling her how sexy you find her at her weight - call her a goddess, tell her she's irresistible, make her feel super wanted. The more she enjoys this kink herself, the more likely she'll get into it. *But still, know none of this might work. I did this with my own partner and she's a lot more open to feeding, but she still doesn't want to gain and has lost weight. And never push her to gain if she says she doesn't want to. Respect her boundaries and her bodily autonomy. Get good at compliments. You gotta to make her feel like she's the hottest thing in the world. Don't specifically say that she's chubby. Don't call her fat, or that you like that her belly is bigger, or that she looks good pudgy. Instead tell her that you've never been more attracted to her. Tell her that you love the way her ass looks, that she has the perfect body, that you can't stop thinking about how hot she looks naked. She needs to be reminded that the weight doesn't make her less attractive, and that starts with you. Just keep reminding her how hot you think she is. Benefits? You make it sound like you're bargaining with her. It's a relationship, not a transaction. Still, the thing she'll appreciate most is knowing you'll still want her no matter her size. She can eat and be lazy and not feel anxious about what you think of her. Otherwise, it's difficult to explain a feeding fetish. Maybe start with talking about what exactly you like (feeding turns you on, that you like noticing her curves, that you enjoy belly play, that you want to tease her, etc). Have a conversation and see how she responds, and maybe you'll find that she likes some of the same things you do.

I don't think there's anything wrong with this. She's already gained some weight, if anything you're just reminding her that you like the way she looks and that you don't expect her to live the same lifestyle you do. If she's happy with her size, and doesn't have any desire to be as fit as you are, then you're still supporting her and showing that you don't expect her to change. To me, that's not unfair. In fact, she'd probably be happy to know that you don't judge her and that you're happy with her just the way she is!

This is a really interesting problem with this kink. When it comes down to it, feedism isn't really about liking fat. It's about making someone fat. It's about the transformation. It's the drive to constantly grow, get bigger, be fatter. But that begs the question... where is the end point? Can you ever really stop? Can you even have that kind of relationship irl? Practically, I can see a few ways a true, long-term feeder/feedee relationship could work: Gaining Very Slow. I imagine a relationship where the feedee takes years and years to work towards a goal weight. You can still partake in all the kink stuff like feeding and overeating, but at a moderated pace. Not only is it pretty easy to make happen, but it'll also avoid many downsides like kink burnout, big food and clothing purchases, and short-term health concerns. The downside being you won't get that instant gratification of growing in real-time, but you're still engaging in the kink, which is a win in all its own. Gaining and Losing. Another scenario that happens often. A feedee gains a bunch, only to end up losing the weight for whatever reason. Could be health, could be lifestyle change, could be completely intentional. But that opens the door to gaining the weight right back. You could still have a feeder/feedee relationship, including all the hot stuff like getting fat very quickly. The downside here of course, is that you need to be okay with having a feedee shrink down again from time to time. Those moments might be tough, but the highs of gaining again could make it all worthwhile. Stopping at a Goal Weight. At that point, it really isn't a feeder/feedee relationship as much as a fat admirer relationship. Still great in my opinion! And you can still do stuff like feedings and size comparisons, just without expecting more gains. Could be sad to see it all end, but that comes with the satisfaction of getting fat in the first place.

People have already beat this point into the ground, but I'll contribute my real-world experience. My partner went from ~130 lbs to a high of 177 lbs, and it was one of the hottest things I'd ever experienced. Her gain was due, in part, to her indulging in my kink (although she is not a feedee herself). She would tease me while snacking and overeating, would show off her growing figure in the bedroom, and even go into fat talk and gaining fantasies. It was a real-life kink dream I never expected to experience. But recently, she had an unrelated health problem arise. She had to go on a strict medical diet, and lost both her ability and desire to eat. Not only that, but her bad health has lead to a noted disinterest in our sex life. She has already lost 15 lbs, and I expect the medical diet and surgeries will only exacerbate that. I worried I would lose my attraction now that she's losing weight. Did I? No. She still turns me on like nothing else. I still find her figure attractive, and I know I will even if she loses a bunch more. I liked her getting fat, but in the end... I really don't care that much. Maybe that will give you some hope. If you're with the right person, the kink stuff won't matter, and I promise you can still be happy.

I think this is some part because women and men engage in kink very differently. I think men are satisfied by looking at kink pics or watching videos. But women don't seem to want that as much - they are more likely to look for erotic lit, or roleplay, or just fantasize when it comes to this kink. Men can get turned on by just what they're looking at. Women might want something more complex. So I think part of the reason there are so many more men on Curvage is because men come here for the content. Either for the modeling vids, or the pics on the boards. Women might choose to go somewhere else instead (like erotic lit sites) - or in many cases, they might not be online at all.

Nah my family actively dislikes fat people. I mean, we don't really know where fetishes come from, and it's common for people do have wildly different backstories with this kink. I'm in the "born this way" camp, where my attraction to weight gain just hit me like a ton of bricks during puberty. But some people say their weight gain kink comes from wanting to push back against societal norms, and other people say they just like feeling confident and attractive with extra weight. I bet if you come from a fat-friendly family, where being overweight is normal and food isn't demonized, then you probably could pickup some feedism tendencies. But is it genetic? Hard for me to say when my experience was the exact opposite.

Curvage tends to not like us talking about other sites, but in short, kind of? There are some girls who post pretty much only on OF, and then like one or two other places. Like Instagram, R*ddit, and Tw*tter. It makes it really hard to find them unless you're really active on those sites. For example, I found lalahehex through a random R*ddit post before she had a Curvage account. I'm sure there are dozens of other kink OF girls who no one knows about. Kind of proves the point that the internet just isn't setup for finding random feedee girls anymore.

Yeah as an old feedist, this brought back memories. There were so many feedees on YouTube, whole playlists worth of people posting like daily. I actually still have some in my subscribed list from way back when. Chubby Girl Videos, LMBB, Cherry Greenlaw (still around btw), big belly babe... anyone remember SinaXO? Or Kessa M? Jesus, their last uploads were 10 years ago... Anyway, I have some thoughts on what's changed, and I agree that it's not just about money. YouTube is commercial now. No one uploads home videos to YouTube anymore, it's all about hyper-produced pseudo-television now. The "community" of fetish watchers is gone, partly because YouTube got stricter about sex content as it got bigger, and partly because YouTube just isn't a social media site anymore. You go there to watch content, not to connect with people Social media changed. YouTube 10 years ago was still the wild west era of the internet. Post what you want where you want, without any social rules or need to make watchable content. I think girls 10 years ago felt like they could safely post belly videos in their little niche, knowing that similar folks were there too. Now?It's all just... content. Gotta get those views to become the next TikTok influencer. I imagine GenZ girls haven't even considered doing things like the girls a decade ago. One we don't think about much is anonymity. 10 years ago you could get away with posting yourself eating on YouTube and it was almost impossible to be discovered, outside this kink. But the internet is so much smaller now, especially with algorithms pulling random content into the mainstream. I bet a lot of girls are scared to post belly content, only to show up on someone's feed to get made fun of for being a gross pervert. Not to mentioned getting found by friends, or getting doxxed... If it were me, I wouldn't feel safe posting anywhere but sites like Curvage these days. And yeah, money is probably a factor too. There was no OF or ** 10 years ago, and the only fetish sites were sketchy or hidden away. Now, a girl who once may have just uploaded a few feeding vids to YouTube can easily create an OF page instead. They get to do the same thing, and make some money off of kinksters at the same time.

Should you point out to her that she's gaining weight and it's turning you on? Yeah, probably not a good idea. But I do think it's okay to remind her how attractive she is to you now. Just general things, like telling her how beautiful she is, and that you're more attracted to her than ever. And just showing her that she's wanted! A lot of people with anorexia fear that gaining weight will make them unappealing and unvalued. Explicitly pointing out her weight gain may bring out that fear and anxiety. But compliments and affirmations will show that she isn't unappealing, and that you do want her. If she notices her gain, the support you give her will help her overcome the self-consciousness that comes with disordered eating. With time, those little affirmations will go a long way. She'll hopefully learn to be more comfortable with her body, and will feel more confident with the weight she's gained. And that could open the door to exploring this kink more too!

Interesting thought! I think skinny models still have the potential to make more money. Top cam models like Belle Delphine and Amouranth have a huge following and make over $1MM a month. I don't think the market is big enough for fat fetish models to make that. BUT I think the average fat fetish model is making more money. That's because there are literally tens of thousands of skinny models, and only the very tippy top of the list actually make the big bucks. Most skinny models get easily lost in the sea of other options. And it's hard to set yourself apart and make a unique brand when every other skinny model is doing the same thing you are. But fat fetish models? Now you're a big fish in a small pond. If you're chubby and want to make weight gain or feeding content, then you immediately become more in-demand than the average skinny model. There really aren't that many fat fetish content creators in the big scheme of things, so it's easier to start out and instantly build a following. Heck, if you need an example, just see how popular modelling has become here on Curvage.

There absolutely is, if you consider the broader "belly fetish" circles. Head to any feedism/stuffing spaces and you'll see lots of people fantasizing about pregnancy and breeding too. Makes sense, since I imagine part of the appeal is "I like when belly get bigger." For me though, it ended up not being really my thing. When my partner was pregnant, I realized that it was definitely fatter/softer bellies I liked, not pregnant ones. Plus, something about the baby being inside gave me "Alien" vibes. Took away a lot of the appeal. But totally understand those that do like it, of course!