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Advice on telling my husband about my fetish


Guest selinasins9_10

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Guest selinasins9_10

Hi, I'm new to the site. I'd really appreciate some advice on this. I'm newly married and I've never been with such a great man in my life.  I wanna start off by saying that my fetish for getting fatter definitely isn't at the forefront, I'd happily forgo that and keep my wonderful husband (attracted to me.) (Also I know he wouldn't leave me if I accidentally got fat.) 

I've told him about it and yea he's not into it. But I weigh about 170 right now and I'm 5'7.  I've unintentionally put on about 35 pounds since we met about 1.5 years ago. I've asked him if he thinks I'm fat now and he's made it clear he doesn't think so. (Maybe he's just being nice?) He's said in response to me asking if he'd be attracted to me if I was a lot fatter, that he wouldn't if I was "too big".  But he also has said to that question that he loves me so much that he'd most likely still wanna make love if i weighed 300 pounds.  I want him to be attracted to me and I'm always happy being thin or this size too. But I have always had this fetish since I was young. However, I've never wanted to base a relationship off of it. I wanted to find a really good match most importantly.  But I think about this all the time.  He also plays around my belly and hips sometimes and seems to enjoy the softness of my hips and belly.  Idk I'm just scared to bring it up anymore cause he's said he's NOT into it at all and he's likely not.  But I fantasize about even just getting 20 or 30 pounds heavier and seeing if he'd say anything about it negatively. But I'd rather ask him again in a way.  Idk.  If anyone could give me their 2 cents about this, I'd REALLY appreciate it. Idk what I'm even asking at this point.  Lol 

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At the end of the day it’s your body and you can do what you want with it. You’re still within a fairly standard weight range and could easily still be seen as conventially attractive so it’s pretty hard to gauge what his reaction will be if you move out of that weight range. That said, if you’ve gained 35lbs in a year and a half and he hasn’t reacted negatively to it then you can probably assume you’ve got a but of wiggle room weight-wise. If I were you, I’d go ahead with gaining the 20-30lbs you wanted to and then checking with him again to see if you’re getting too big for him

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If you want to gain another 20-30 lbs I say go for it!

And if he often plays with your soft hips and belly now, I have a feeling he will dig it too. Even if he’s not into hardcore feedism stuff, I’m sure he’d still find you attractive, there would just be an extra layer of thickness to your curves lol

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Even if your husband isn't into feedism, you know what he will be into? You being confident in your body, and getting you really turned on. 

As a guy, I can say that the hottest thing someone can do is be confident and excited when in the bedroom. There are things my partner likes that I swore I wouldn't be into, but seeing how hot and bothered it makes her makes me get hot and bothered about it. Now I want to do all those things with her just because I know it gets her going. Nothing is more attractive than having a partner who is enthusiastic about being intimate with you and showing off their body.

So! My recommendation would be to lean into this with your husband. When he plays with your hips and belly, show him how much it turns you on. Tease him by telling him how sexy it is to you. Hell, tell him just the thought of him touching your softness makes you want to take him to bed. I guarantee that, even if it isn't his own kink, he'll be so excited to know that he's turning you on that he'll be into it anyway.

From there, just start making it a normal thing to talk about your desires. Talk with him about all the things you like, and what he does that you enjoy. Share some fantasies - some of the relatable ones to start - that you imagine him doing with you. Let him know how much you love it all. Creating that dialogue will make it easier to find healthy ways to explore your kink together. And I know that sharing your excitement will get him excited too!

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