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So I have two nieces, age 5 and 21 and some might say I am a bad aunty. Kids are so honest. The 5 year old will be like, “aunty Mira, why are you eating an orange, you already ate so much food. You’re going to get massive” lol lmfao I love that kid but she stays far from me so I don’t see her enough. Recently my life changed and I became a guardian and support system to my useless brothers amazingly gifted perfect daughter. She is a gamer, nerd, does coding, 3D animation and is studying computer science and chemistry but can’t decide on a major. Soon after my 21 year old niece moved in with me, almost two months ago, I was showing her a cool post on Instagram when I accidentally touched my phone with my fat fingers and opened up the thumbnails of my giant hanging sack stuffed to the brim with thousands and thousands of calories.  This was one of the most awkward moments of my life and no rock is big enough to hide my shame and embarrassment. I share a kitchen with my niece and her boyfriend in their house that I just rented for them opposite my small cottage. They are both underweight and have bmis of 16 and 17. They haven’t gained anything since they got here - due to their high metabolisms, not due to food shortages - but they recently found my mass gainer so I am super curious to see what’s going to happen over the next few weeks. Weirdly we all have massive appetites so sometimes I don’t want to share certain things like cake and I stuff myself in the mall car park on my own, gleefully smiling at anyone who looks at my savage gluttonous style of eating. A few times my 21 year old niece found the cake boxes in my car when she was fetching something for me while I was busy eating and I didn’t feel like getting up. She doesn’t complain that I don’t share all the cake but she will say, caramel cream, good choice. Far too polite and sweet. Once she asked if the cake packaging was recyclable. I stupidly stupidly told her about curvage and that I was thinking of modelling and she visited the site. Damn. The comments she read out loud to me. F my life. My brain was exploding. “That’s the fattest thing I’ve ever seen” was a comment that stood out for my sweet little niece, all 45kg of her. I felt really confused. I thought about the times I was baby sitting for this cute perfect child. She still seems so innocent but she is the opposite and has more guts and balls then a lot of people which she illustrated when she drove over someone who was shooting at her car one night. It only has one bullet hole. She drove off really fast. I am so proud of her for not dying that night. So now she is no longer using meth or coke and in my care and needs to study and get qualified and get a drivers licence and do adulting stuff like my tax admin. And she needs to gain a bit of weight cos I look like a whale next to her with her bmi of 16 and mine being 36. It’s been strange staying with her for the past two months and I had to figure out couples counselling, leaving work in the middle of the day to fix their relationship in record time when they had a massive fight so I could go back to work and meet my deadline. F my life. I wish I was making this stuff up. I have to document some of this stuff in films cos no one would believe the way it goes and continues… too many overwhelming and over the top stuff going down. Anyway, thanks if you read this far. Sorry for my stoned stream of consciousness lol. Here are a few of the pics that my niece saw on my phone two months back 🙈🙈🙈🙈🙈

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Just putting this here cos getting chubby turned me into an exhibitionist. And yes, I am only chubby. Still got tons of growing to do. Even if I am a bad greedy aunty hope I can still be ok as a guardian. I know 21 is an adult’s age but she is still a kid in so many ways and this is her first proper home. Let me not mess this up. 

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It sounds like you're a hard worker and care for people a lot especially your niece. They clearly know you are trying to help and look past those situations especially being supportive in their own ways it seems with the fairly tame comments of what would normally be a fairly strange situation. Doesn't seem like you are doing bad at all.

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16 minutes ago, Fisherman07 said:

You got this!! Your definitely amazing in every which way possible!! Plus the belly looks amazing 

Thanks for saying this. I think so too. I used to hide from cameras when I was thin and hardly ever posted pics of myself. Now I can’t stop taking selfies and staring at how hot I look. I honestly hope my niece doesn’t re visit curvage and read this but she is legally an adult so if she does I hope she doesn’t take offence to me sharing my real life drama with a few hundred lovely internet people, lol. I don’t think she will mind. She gets that I have a kink and she is also bi and also thinks big girls are hot. She recently got dragged onto stage by a 400lb Instagram model at a dancehall event I took her to celebrate her arrival. She couldn’t escape as this woman,  many times her size, pulled her onto the stage to dance with her. The djs were losing their minds at the spectacle and she loved it. I was mildly jealous but also just high and happy, lol. We were sharing a j just before this and the Lion Iron Zion song was playing and I felt like I was in a movie. So cool. 

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Guest memyselfandice

You're too hot and you're a caring and amazing person, plus you look exceptional in a bikini, enough said! Thanks for sharing your journey, making my week! 

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9 minutes ago, GrowingGirl said:

Thanks for saying this. I think so too. I used to hide from cameras when I was thin and hardly ever posted pics of myself. Now I can’t stop taking selfies and staring at how hot I look. I honestly hope my niece doesn’t re visit curvage and read this but she is legally an adult so if she does I hope she doesn’t take offence to me sharing my real life drama with a few hundred lovely internet people, lol. I don’t think she will mind. She gets that I have a kink and she is also bi and also thinks big girls are hot. She recently got dragged onto stage by a 400lb Instagram model at a dancehall event I took her to celebrate her arrival. She couldn’t escape as this woman,  many times her size, pulled her onto the stage to dance with her. The djs were losing their minds at the spectacle and she loved it. I was mildly jealous but also just high and happy, lol. We were sharing a j just before this and the Lion Iron Zion song was playing and I felt like I was in a movie. So cool. 

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Anytime beautiful!! She’ll be good and you’ll be good!! Sounds like you guys have fun together and get along excellent!! And definitely share similarities which is awesome!! Keep doing what your doing and things will be amazing!! Holy shit you look breathe taking!!

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20 minutes ago, FASWE87 said:

LOVE that you share all this with the community! I have been in the feedism community for 16 years and never read anything like this! BMI of 36 and getting bigger and bigger! you are going to be even hotter then you alrady are 

This is so sweet. Thanks for this feedback. You guys are like my therapy in this fd up world, lol. So happy to be here and I like seeing the writer and storyteller in me come out. So much of my work is technical and button pushing and forms and filing and the artist in me doesn’t get enough chance to express herself. I love my belly like it’s an artistic creation and expression of all the lushness and warmth inside me. Really happy if my self depreciating rambling resonates. 

 

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4 minutes ago, memyselfandice said:

You're too hot and you're a caring and amazing person, plus you look exceptional in a bikini, enough said! Thanks for sharing your journey, making my week! 

Weak my love, weak. On that note, really sorry about my own terrible spelling and grammar. I am not used to these fat hands and also just developed weird laziness due to constant food comas. I will improve. Grammar and spelling are quite nice. 

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Guest memyselfandice
4 minutes ago, GrowingGirl said:

Weak my love, weak. On that note, really sorry about my own terrible spelling and grammar. I am not used to these fat hands and also just developed weird laziness due to constant food comas. I will improve. Grammar and spelling are quite nice. 

Lol you're too funny, I'm more of a numbers guy myself, no worries. How about this? You are making my week and making me weak with your posts and pics! 

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14 minutes ago, memyselfandice said:

Lol you're too funny, I'm more of a numbers guy myself, no worries. How about this? You are making my week and making me weak with your posts and pics! 

Love it. Nothing like a good play on words and it’s great that you like numbers. What number would you like to see on my scale in a year from now?

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43 minutes ago, Monkey said:

It sounds like you're a hard worker and care for people a lot especially your niece. They clearly know you are trying to help and look past those situations especially being supportive in their own ways it seems with the fairly tame comments of what would normally be a fairly strange situation. Doesn't seem like you are doing bad at all.

I do care. Fortunately we get on really well and I tried to create a safe and inspiring space. It’s good if we can still let lose, dance, drink and indulge in some lovely green goodness like spinach and herbs, lol. I feel like her coming to stay with me has helped shift me out of my shell a bit more and given me a new lease on life. Its really great to feel this way. I feel a bit more brave and ready to take risks. 

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13 minutes ago, GrowingGirl said:

Love it. Nothing like a good play on words and it’s great that you like numbers. What number would you like to see on my scale in a year from now?

What number would you love to see on your scale??

doesn’t matter any size and weight and you still be beyond beautiful and amazing 

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Guest memyselfandice
23 minutes ago, GrowingGirl said:

Love it. Nothing like a good play on words and it’s great that you like numbers. What number would you like to see on my scale in a year from now?

Well my goal is to be able to bench press 300 lbs by end of year so personally, that number does have a nice ring to it, doesn't it? Of course, it is already July and I don't think you could gain 100 lbs in 5 1/2 months, so eat what you like and get to the hottest number you like and enjoy the ride baby girl! Just know that we're all here to encourage you whatever you choose. Also, let's not lie, we're here to see those hot AF pics you keep posting 😉

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Glad you like my pics. I love taking them. I keep having to move them to my mac so I can free up memory. Even though half the belly pics look the same I love all of them and I find them mesmerising and spellbinding. I am generally a really humble and laid back person but getting fat has given me this whole new type of self love

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