Do these people really love fat or do they hate it?

[NocturnalDevotion CLIPS]

9 hours ago, PreyToGod said:

Some just love the look and feel of it, others  like the meaning of it - that someone has been greedy and decadent, others like feeling dominant and enjoy degrading people for 'ruining' their bodies so it's hard to generalise I guess.

But above all people should be respectful and not just assume that everyone else shares their same specific kink 

I like that you brought up the tactile aspect of fat. That is one of my favorite parts and why I like soft fat so much!!! 

[vpprof]

I have a new mattress. And it has a gazillion layers etc. But the uppermost layer is just… so resembling my ex's belly, it's crazy 😂 I legitly stroke it sometimes

[Sickboy]

I personally get off on the idea of a girl "ruining" her traditionally attractive body. With weight gain, tattoos, cigarettes, piercings. Not to say I think those things are bad. Still big part of the appeal is the wrongness of it all. 

IRL I kinda just go for women with big asses and tats tho.

[NocturnalDevotion CLIPS]

2 hours ago, Sickboy said:

I personally get off on the idea of a girl "ruining" her traditionally attractive body. With weight gain, tattoos, cigarettes, piercings. Not to say I think those things are bad. Still big part of the appeal is the wrongness of it all. 

IRL I kinda just go for women with big asses and tats tho.

I’m just curious since you consider tattoos “ruining”- do you prefer shitty tattoos? I see what you mean with the wrongness but for me personally tattoos are only a turn on if they are good, but soooo many women have horrible tattoos and people still think they are hot. So someone likes them? My husband will be totally unattracted to the most beautiful woman (like the singer/rapper Brooke Candy, pictured below) if they have bad tattoos, hers are really bad.

But I think I get what you are saying- those things are a turn on because they are taboo? I get that, I don’t understand getting turned on by things that are not taboo honestly, it’s like what is there to get excited about with a regular attractive person, boring!

[NocturnalDevotion CLIPS]

5 hours ago, vpprof said:

I have a new mattress. And it has a gazillion layers etc. But the uppermost layer is just… so resembling my ex's belly, it's crazy 😂 I legitly stroke it sometimes

I pet my velvet headboard. My husband didn’t believe until saw me doing it one morning while I was sleeping lol! 
 

Also the thing I have found that feels the absolute most like fat are Squishmellows. It’s so similar I wonder what is up with the person who designed them. Mine is a mouse but this is what they look like.

OMG! Shark Tank idea,- sexy dolls made of Squishmellow filling- advertising them on  here! No one steal that idea! Lol!

[fat_elf]

For me, the whole point of the feeder and fat admirer that I am, is to take care of any women I date (even in the hypothetical imagery of any story I read, or any video I watch, or even just any images I see). I understand the appeal of the humiliation, the taboo, the force-feeding, or the fantasy of an unwilling gainer, but none of those are turn ons for me, particularly. In fact, an unwilling gainer is a major turn off for me. Somebody who is fat and doesn't want to be fat, who actively dislikes being fat (as opposed to, at worst, getting fat because they know I'll like it and they don't mind it) feels worse and less sexy than just a slim woman anyway. I feel like the thing that makes me excited about any fat women and especially so of women who are at least willing, preferably eager, to fatten up, is the feeling of taking care of a woman and being so loving with her. Hand feeding her a lot of her favourite food, massaging her bloated belly if she eats more than she's used to, cuddling with her and feeling her thicker, softer, heavier body, telling her how beautiful she is at any size, but also how much sexier she is when she eats as much she just did, and how much sexier she is getting as she fattens up. I love the idea of her being the one who is fattening up and, even if I was the one who first introduced her to the idea of gorging/fattening up, she would now keep on eating this much and gaining this much weight, whether I was still around or not. I'm just lucky enough to be allowed along for the experience. Honestly, I do get turned on by the women who gain so much weight that they are too fat even to stand up anymore, let alone walk around any, featured in stories and faked in some videos of fantasy weight gain, and *very* occasionally, actually attained (or at least, nearly so) by few fortunate feedees. That incredible immensity would indeed be a sexual fantasy come true (even while ironically making actual sex impossible, without machinery) *but* I am well aware of just how dependent a woman who got that fat would become on the people in her life, and I would never want anyone to feel dependent on me while we dated/had regular sex/etc. So, as such, that remains a pretty unrealistic fantasy, not because of the sheer amount of weight gain needed, but because I would want to be sure that whoever this immense beauty was, she was comfortably capable of hiring carers, such that she could be an independent woman, even while becoming bigger and more bed bound every day. Now, all that said, I don't have any problem with any fetish or roleplay that my feedee wants to try. Anything that relies on my ability to improvise or act unhappy about your appetite and weight gain will probably fail, but if you give me a role as a "secret" feeder (albeit one who is rather blatantly feeding you and has clearly helped you put on a hundred pounds that you somehow failed to notice) then sure, I'll let you accuse me of "sneaking food into the house" and "sabotaging any diets" to make you "into this huge, fat, blob". Or, if you *want* to be forcefed as if you weren't eager to be a hundred pounds heavier, then I can do that. Heck, if you want to be submissive, or pretend to be a pig, or a "hu-cow", I think I'd actually like that. Especially so, if you happen to express pride in how much you eat and how much you fatten up "for" me, when we both know that this is just as much for you. Just don't expect me to be much of a dominant or an owner (or even much of submissive myself, actually).

[Sickboy]

12 hours ago, NogutNoglory said:

I’m just curious since you consider tattoos “ruining”- do you prefer shitty tattoos? I see what you mean with the wrongness but for me personally tattoos are only a turn on if they are good, but soooo many women have horrible tattoos and people still think they are hot. So someone likes them? My husband will be totally unattracted to the most beautiful woman (like the singer/rapper Brooke Candy, pictured below) if they have bad tattoos, hers are really bad.

But I think I get what you are saying- those things are a turn on because they are taboo? I get that, I don’t understand getting turned on by things that are not taboo honestly, it’s like what is there to get excited about with a regular attractive person, boring!

Omg, Brooke is absolutely gorgeous. Love her music too. I think she sparked something in teenage me. 

I don't really think her tattoos are bad. It's all a matter of taste. Personally I prefer more of a sketchy tattoo style rather than some "beautiful" ornamental or realism you find on pinterest. 

I like when a tattoo lacks meaning or looks nonesensical yet is still profesionally made.

The "ruining" your body aspect largely comes from what I perceive society thinks ruining your body is. So I guess I do like what others think of as "bad" tattoos. But still those tattoos I like are as much artistically valid. 

[NocturnalDevotion CLIPS]

On 2/3/2021 at 3:15 AM, Sickboy said:

Omg, Brooke is absolutely gorgeous. Love her music too. I think she sparked something in teenage

YES!!! She is super cool, gorgeous and I love her music too!!! It's so funny how people went crazy over W.A.P. meanwhile she has much more provacative song lyrics that that!!!

[Guest bobbington]

Honestly before I discovered these online communities the whole humiliation aspect was something I'd never even considered. For me, it was more about being a provider and enabling a special someone to indulge and be a little bit greedy. Plus, I just like that soft look. I guess embarrassment kind of hot in it's own way, when girls start to get too big for the clothes for example, but only in an embarrassed pinup-girl kind of way (see below):
 
Actual humiliation and degradation, to the point where it actually upsets the person on the receiving end has never been hot to me. 

[tw71]

It always intrigues me to see the "why" of these "non conformist" interests like preferring fat.....

I, too, have to say the degrading women part of this "scene" is uncomfortable to me. I understand the appeal in a real basic, maybe even carnal way?  But I was always raised to be a "nice guy" and truth is? My childhood was pretty normal in the sense my parents didn't get divorced, and I had two younger brothers, and we took summer family vacations... I went to private schools until half way through high school, etc. etc.  I never liked to get into a fight, and I consider myself a pretty intelligent guy. It just goes against my nature to mistreat a woman, calling her degrading names and so on.

For me, the appeal of fat women probably goes back to my preferences I discovered I had back in grade school.  The first girl I really found physically attractive, as in always wanting to stare at her when I got the chance, was thick and curvy. I especially remember liking her big thighs and calves. And I soon discovered I had a thing for really big boobs and butts on women. But I was completely turned off by implants. I think that reinforced my love of heavier, thicker women because especially at the time I was a teenager or young adult? There were a lot of women getting well known as exotic dancers or porn stars with ridiculously large breasts that were obviously fake, because the rest of their body was too thin for it to look realistic.

The biggest struggle I've had, having this preference, is running up against women who are unhappy with their bodies. I've even been told I'm "sick in the head" for finding anything remotely attractive about fat, by a fat girl I liked. She proceeded to go on one of those "Biggest Loser" type TV shows as a contestant, in fact -- and I have no idea what became of her since then.

I will say, too? I've come to realize I even have two different sides to my interest.  I guess one part is the pure fetish component?  That's the part where I have to admit I get turned on by a lot of the really large women who post pics or videos online. Yet in real life, I don't think I'd really find them my type at all. Because to *really* date someone, I want the whole package of them being reasonably mobile and active, being acceptably healthy (ignoring the doctors who act like simply being overweight = unhealthy), and quite frankly? I'm sure I'd grow tired of the considerable expense of buying the quantities of food that some of them are eating too.  The women I'd absolutely love to get the opportunity to date or go out with steady are usually in more like the 200-275lb. range (depending on height and overall build/shape).

I really do like the "counter culture/nonconformist" aspect of all of it though. I have a second fetish/turn-on that has to do with muscular women.  And I've realized it has a nice intersection with my heavier/thicker preference. (Women who weigh more are going to have bigger leg muscles since they need stronger legs to carry their larger weight around, assuming they're doing the same amount of activity as anyone else is.  Plus, there's that thing that muscle is more dense than fat, so women who build more muscle tend to weigh more than similar sized women who don't work out or who aren't genetically gifted as the more muscular type naturally.)  But ultimately, all of these things are just preferences and kinks....  It's not a deal-breaker if a woman doesn't match up to any of them. I think it's been more of the deal-breaker if they DID but they decide they don't like those aspects of their own bodies and they try to change (lose weight or stop lifting weights if they used to), after we get together and they know those are attributes I liked about them.

 

[frimfrim]

For me, it's having some belly fat that I find most attractive, depending on your build that means straight-up normal to low end of overweight. So I empathize with seeing people not interested in gaining get bombarded with harassment in a community that's supposed to support them.

My perspective on feedism/gaining is a little different from yours, since I prefer what most people would still consider an average build. I'd be perfectly happy with meeting someone who puts on a little bit of "relationship weight" with no difference in lifestyle, and I don't have any qualms convincing them to do it because I feel like it wouldn't be a big change for most people. My current partner has lost weight since we started dating, but she's got a much healthier relationship with food and exercise now.

I also totally see where you're coming from - you respect and empathize with people, and it's really hard to imagine that other adults are the complete opposite.The nonconsensual humiliation or degradation I see in the FA community is the biggest reason I don't want to talk about the community. The dumb comments are more likely than not just people unable to control their urges without an actual adult punishing them, and I'm skeptical that many of them will ever learn. There's also a lot of different niches here, like seeing celebrities get "fat," a whole range of different size preferences, and overlaps with other fetishes. And that's fine. Normal, well-adjusted people don't push their fetishes onto others.

"This is what happens normally, just ignore them" is what I would have said if I was younger. I've had the same urges to just type out unfiltered comments. But I'm in my late-20s now and realizing that people who are supposedly more mature are setting shitty examples for the kids. Typing out your inner thoughts to someone is creepy at best, and borderline grooming if you're doing it in a "nice" fashion to a younger individual. Of course, they just say you should be grateful that you're getting attention or that it should be expected. I hate it, and I hate it even more because this is only the stuff people are saying in public.

I think there's two ways to deal with those people - either call them out like you're doing, or shrug and deal with it. The latter's really not an option for models and content creators. I imagine it's a big reason a lot of them leave.

I'm unhappy with a moderator saying that they can't do anything about assholes on their platform. Their role is to run the site and cultivate the community they want to see, not just hand-wave issues away with "boys will be boys" and nitpicking.

But that's the community we're in, and I also admittedly don't have the dedication (or time) to change anything here as a lurker.

 

I'm not going to straight-up defend the people who said "dumb people are gonna be dumb", but they're in a very different position from you. They're not the ones getting these shitty comments directly, and assuming they're men they probably haven't had to grow up worrying about harassment in the same way. I see it as a throwaway comment that reflects their personal experiences, but it's still an insensitive response to your request for well thought-out comments.

Quote

Some of the comments I was like "hell yeah!" and others I was like "yikerrrrs"!

Also @gorJESS, I had the same response and wanted to quote you. You are amazingly diplomatic and I love your writing style. I'm tempted to look through your entire thread just to read your posts, dealing with serious subjects with a casual tone and full punctuation just exudes confidence and experience.

 

[Guest gorJESS]

@frimfrim Thank you very much 🙏 I appreciate the comment and I also like the rest of your post. I agree with most of it. 

4 hours ago, frimfrim said:

I think there's two ways to deal with those people - either call them out like you're doing, or shrug and deal with it. The latter's really not an option for models and content creators. I imagine it's a big reason a lot of them leave.

You're right, those are the two ways of dealing with it. But the latter IS an option and it works like a charm, for me anyway. A lot of things are hard to ignore in this imperfect world, true. But sometimes raging against that which I don't prefer is only going to upset myself. I'm not saying people shouldn't speak up, I'm not saying people should tolerate outright abuse, but there's tremendous power in attention. What people say on the internet has nothing to do with me, even when it's "about" me. People tend to shut up when you don't give them the reaction they're looking for. Wish them well and do you. In other words, fukkum. 👋😆👍 I, alone can't perfect someone else's website, a community, the world at large or any person. "Consider how hard it is to change something about yourself and realize what little chance you have in changing others".

In my profile it says "Curvage dot org is not responsible for my feelings". All that means is that I can read whatever it is on a screen, but the way I react is my responsibility. Like ok... someone could tell me to go kill myself. I can either be like "yeah ok guy I'll get right on that" or I can go and actually kill myself. The person who said it IS an asshole, not taking that away, but he was not the one who shot me. People can say whatever they want. It's not a problem until I believe it and... good luck penetrating this force field of overwhelming joy. 🥰

About the original topic of this thread... I've been here for about a year and I know exactly what she's talking about. I've had one or two guys talk to me and say how much they love my belly, fat, whatever... but then they ALSO want to "tease" me about it and let me tell you... that's an example of this: 

5 hours ago, frimfrim said:

Normal, well-adjusted people don't push their fetishes onto others.

I'm the kind of woman who would prefer expressions of admiration and gratitude, not degradation and shame, for doing the very thing he claimed to like. I realize that some people are into it, but doing it in this way is just deceptive and if you know the girl isn't into it, stop. She ain't the one for you bro, move on. 
I usually beat them to that though. I throw deuces up like a bulimic. If I don't like what someone says to me here or I get a bad vibe from them, I don't fw them. At all. I came here to do me. 

K I'm getting a little carried away now let me stop lol. Thanks again btw!!! ❤️ 

One more thing... I'm not a religious person, but I am highly spiritual, and it is still true that:
"In the final analysis is it between you and God. It was never between you and them anyway". In other words you're not responsible for another person's behavior. You are responsible for yours. So be bigger. 

No pun. 🤪

[curvylovedove]

On 1/29/2021 at 11:07 PM, schmoejoe said:

Hey, so this is the first time I've ever replied to anything on here. I'm a pretty athletic guy, and tbh fat girls are just sexy to me. I'm not really into degradation stuff, and I definitely don't see fat girls as beneath me at all. However it's a major turn on for me when girls refer to themselves as chubby/fat and are willing to play with their bellies. I recently realized the reason why this turns me on so much: it's validation for both them and me. 

Like, it's so common for bigger girls (I've dated my fair share) to be really insecure about their size, so it can feel weird as someone that's attracted to that body type to know that my partner isn't happy with her body, even though I think it's really sexy. The closest feeling I can relate it to is sort of like guilt. Even my wife will say, "I know you love my body but I'm not happy with the way I look" when she's put on a bit of weight, and I feel really bad knowing that she's not happy with how she looks, and wish that she could see herself the way I do.

So for a girl to acknowledge and be unashamed of her fat validates that attraction I have towards her body. My favorite thing is when you talk about your body in your videos, because it's sexy to see you feel good about the way you look, too. So hopefully that sheds some light on the issue?

But ultimately fuck anyone that tries to put you down in any kind of non-roleplay way. That's abusive and shitty, and I'm sorry you've had to deal with that. I promise there are more people out there that think you're a fucking rockstar goddess though.

I feel the exact way. 

[NocturnalDevotion CLIPS]

On 3/2/2021 at 4:47 AM, frimfrim said:

For me, it's having some belly fat that I find most attractive, depending on your build that means straight-up normal to low end of overweight. So I empathize with seeing people not interested in gaining get bombarded with harassment in a community that's supposed to support them.

My perspective on feedism/gaining is a little different from yours, since I prefer what most people would still consider an average build. I'd be perfectly happy with meeting someone who puts on a little bit of "relationship weight" with no difference in lifestyle, and I don't have any qualms convincing them to do it because I feel like it wouldn't be a big change for most people. My current partner has lost weight since we started dating, but she's got a much healthier relationship with food and exercise now.

I also totally see where you're coming from - you respect and empathize with people, and it's really hard to imagine that other adults are the complete opposite.The nonconsensual humiliation or degradation I see in the FA community is the biggest reason I don't want to talk about the community. The dumb comments are more likely than not just people unable to control their urges without an actual adult punishing them, and I'm skeptical that many of them will ever learn. There's also a lot of different niches here, like seeing celebrities get "fat," a whole range of different size preferences, and overlaps with other fetishes. And that's fine. Normal, well-adjusted people don't push their fetishes onto others.

"This is what happens normally, just ignore them" is what I would have said if I was younger. I've had the same urges to just type out unfiltered comments. But I'm in my late-20s now and realizing that people who are supposedly more mature are setting shitty examples for the kids. Typing out your inner thoughts to someone is creepy at best, and borderline grooming if you're doing it in a "nice" fashion to a younger individual. Of course, they just say you should be grateful that you're getting attention or that it should be expected. I hate it, and I hate it even more because this is only the stuff people are saying in public.

I think there's two ways to deal with those people - either call them out like you're doing, or shrug and deal with it. The latter's really not an option for models and content creators. I imagine it's a big reason a lot of them leave.

I'm unhappy with a moderator saying that they can't do anything about assholes on their platform. Their role is to run the site and cultivate the community they want to see, not just hand-wave issues away with "boys will be boys" and nitpicking.

But that's the community we're in, and I also admittedly don't have the dedication (or time) to change anything here as a lurker.

 

I'm not going to straight-up defend the people who said "dumb people are gonna be dumb", but they're in a very different position from you. They're not the ones getting these shitty comments directly, and assuming they're men they probably haven't had to grow up worrying about harassment in the same way. I see it as a throwaway comment that reflects their personal experiences, but it's still an insensitive response to your request for well thought-out comments.

Also @gorJESS, I had the same response and wanted to quote you. You are amazingly diplomatic and I love your writing style. I'm tempted to look through your entire thread just to read your posts, dealing with serious subjects with a casual tone and full punctuation just exudes confidence and experience.

 

I love everything that you said so much I don’t even know what to respond except yes, yes, yes’s across the board!!!

As far as the “dumb people are going to be dumb” comments I don’t think the people that commented grasped that I’m NOT talking about distasteful teasing, I’m talking about people explaining the root of the weight gain fetish as degradation and power and control and “ruining” someone. People calling fat/chubby women “objectively ugly” even though they are supposedly here because they are attracted to women with fat (I’ll never get that one).  I have since realized that the men who make comments like this do truly look down on/hate women, fat or not and they feel “empowered” when they antagonize the models.
 

 As far as the comment about the mod, I completely agree with you and that my husband said the exact same thing, I shouldn’t have to go all the way to S77 to get something done because “freedom of speech”- freedom of hate speech? freedom to degrade the women that people come to this website to see? The wonderful unique thing about this website is that people can interact with the content creators which I would think most see as a privilege or at least a neat fun thing, not an opportunity to lash out at women because of their own personal issues. God damn! Yet I get scolded for the title of my thread! I thought I was being good by not saying “men”. 
 

I guess my question is mostly- Are these themes of domination, degradation, control just a fetish. I enjoy pretty messed up fantasies but in a way it’s part of the excitement for me, that I see the world differently.  I really don’t care if an 18-20 BMI is “most attractive” I feel like part of the thing with this is giving that nonsense the middle finger,***** the taboo appeal of fat, while realizing it’s ridiculous that’s it’s so taboo. *****The taboo makes it exciting but by definition (a social or religious custom prohibiting or forbidding discussion of a particular practice or forbidding association with a particular person, place, or thing.) It’s just a rule made up by society, it’s not fact and I enjoy breaking that rule, also I like what I like, whatever. But I think some (gotta say it particularly men because your partner’s looks is more of a status symbol for men) hate or are very uncomfortable with themselves for not liking “what they are supposed to” and if fucks them up. I honestly do not think most men, if they were being honest and aren’t so completely brainwashed that the media owns their blood flow to their nether regions - would take the girl on the right hands down. I really don’t think most men really want to have sex with super models I just don’t, I’m not a guy, and I’m an FA but I think especially with our current sex symbol Kim Kardashian, people are about that T and A all day long, if it comes with a belly I really don’t see anyone kicking that out of bed, I don’t. So why feel bad about yourself for what arouses you? What’s supposed to arouse you changes all the time anyway.  One 20 year cycle it’s thin no butt, huge boobs, blonde, now it’s huge butt, super curvy, dark and exotic.  Trends in sex symbols actually really fascinates me. And, how strange - people follow it! Like how is what (I’ve been trying to avoid saying it) what gets your dick hard changed when the trends change?  You can show me male models all day long and the only way I would get turned on is picturing them teasing me. I just don’t get turned on by that, and I can’t make myself.  And I am more than ok with that. 
 

But it’s easy to see if a man is uncomfortable with what they are attracted to they will lash out towards the women they are attracted to.  

I’m not sure if this is making sense (fun fact: I didn’t go to college and when to beauty school instead because I hate writing essays! If you had told me I would be voluntarily writing essays now about fetish content...Lol) so I’m not the best writer.  For me I can fantasize about my husband being humiliated but if ANYONE did that in real life I would attack them.  So I can love a person but still have fantasies like that - I can separate it. But I think some people TRULY believe that fat is wrong and that way society treats fat people is justified and probably would be the one humiliating a fat person in real life it doesn’t stay as just fantasy.  They don’t take their “prey” seriously, they are completely just objects to them. It’s weird, I don’t get it but maybe a part of them really needs to believe the taboo to keep it exciting, they don’t see the fallacy in the fact that fat is “evil” and the worst thing in the world?

OMG “I don’t know what to respond”- yeah right! Anyway, the things that people say bother me because I see some truth to them I guess, or other people behaving in a way that it proves their point.  The reason it bothers me is it messes with my fantasizing abilities if I’m forced to believe that attraction to fat isn’t a real thing. But I’m attracted to fat, so it must be real, but maybe it’s different for men, and then the wheels keep spinning. I guess the best thing is to try to be like @gorJESS and not think about it, I’m happy with the way I look, I get turned on making videos and playing with my belly, so I imagine there are others too, especially since I have people following my thread and buying my videos, I’m not super popular but I’ll tell you, I have the best fans/friends/followers on Curvage !!!(shout out!!!). Thank you SO MUCH FOR EVERYTHING THAT YOU SAID💕💕💕💕💕!!!!

Also- the “they should be happy that they are even getting attention” thing is to me a very obvious “fat women are disgusting and they should be over the moon if anyone even looks at them oh- and have no self respect whatsoever” which again makes me question motives!

[NocturnalDevotion CLIPS]

14 hours ago, NogutNoglory said:

they don’t see the fallacy in the fact that fat is “evil” and the worst thing in the world?

Not *fact*- idea/concept/belief- I did not proofread nearly enough, apologies!