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Guest Mr Froggy

When they get TOO big?

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Guest Mr Froggy

I've noticed many threads here asking for advice to get a partner into gaining but im really curious how many of you out there have ever became "victims of your own success", as it were?

I.e  how many of you have encouraged a girl to gain only for her to get so into it she blows through your usual size/weight preference limits and you needed to ask her to cut back or start working out?   

What happens when a feeder gets to proverbially have their cake and (have their feedee) eat it?   

What % of feeder guys here have no upper weight/size limit at all and are attracted purely to the act of gaining itself?

What % of you have had a limit but blew through it IRL because you were either blinded by love or you found yourself unable to notice your partner getting bigger?   

How many of you have found your preferences change over time and suddenly one day you've woken up, and noticed your formerly 180lb chubby GF is 300lbs and you think she's too big now?

 

Kinda curious about this because a recurring theme I've noticed in the FA community is the dichotomy between those who see gaining as a means to an end,  and those who come to see perpetual gaining as an end in itself.  

 

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I'm really surprised I'm the first one replying to this, but here goes.

First off let me say that there is a specific range that I tend to find attractive, let's just say 150-300 lbs on most women. That's not a set in stone rule for me, but if I think about most of the women that I've seen and said to myself "wow she's extremely attractive" I'd say they fall in that range. 

That said, I also believe that gaining in itself is attractive. Its watching the over-indulgence again and again. Its the struggle for her to button those jeans that fit last month, the belly peeking out under her shirt that used to easily cover her midsection. Its the wife coming home after a shopping trip with pants the next size up because she just can't quite squeeze her bulging stomach into her old ones comfortably anymore. 

I was with a girl for 6 years that gained almost 200 lbs. She went from a thick 210 to a huge 400 or damn close to it. If I really think about her shape over the years we were together, she was probably the most attractive at around 300-325. She was fairly tall and big boned, so her weighing 300 lbs was very different than my 5'2" wife weighing 300 pounds would be. I never once thought to myself "she's getting too big ive got to get her to slow down" or anything. For all of the reasons I stated above, it was fun and sexy to watch her grow. I still found her attractive past her "perfect weight" but there were things I could have complained about. Her breasts got so big and heavy they started to pretty much hang down on top of her stomach. Her stomach that once had that beach ball roundness to it was now a big floppy hanging gut. Her once round shapely ass turned more square and shelf-like from so much fat piling up back there.

So really did she pass my personal preference for raw beauty by gaining more weight? I suppose she did. But it didn't matter to me. I would have never asked her to lose weight. I was in love with her and if she wanted to stuff herself until she was immobile I would have hand delivered her the trays of food and rubbed her belly while she licked her plate clean. 

My wife is a different story entirely. She was so much smaller in every dimension as compared to my ex that I truly questioned myself for finding her so attractive. She was definitely one of the smaller women that I've been romantically involved with, but I had been slobbering over her since the first day I saw her. (We were neighbors) She was cute for sure, but what really attracted me to her was her personality. She just seemed so genuine, honest, and not afraid to tell it like it is. I've said this many times: while the initial physical attraction is important to any relationship, deep love for your partner brings out their beauty in your eyes. My wife gets more beautiful to me every day, and I truly mean that. I could open up a book of the top 100 most beautiful women that have ever lived, then look at a picture of my wife and choose her every time, hands down. 

Now my wife has also put on a significant amount of weight sine we've been together, and I do find that very sexy. I don't foresee my wife ever getting to a weight that I would find undesirable. So far every curve she's added to her figure has made her even more gorgeous in my book, and I think she could put on another 50 pounds at least and I would feel the same way. As with my ex though, I would never ask her to lose weight if she gained past a point that I believed she was slightly less attractive. That's part of the package with me. My girls can get as fat as they want. I'm not going to sit here and say well I want you to be obese and have a tummy that's nice and big but doesn't hang, or you can keep eating until your boobs start to sag, or your ass needs to be shaped like a bubble or any of that crap. The women I've been with have all liked to eat and I take pride in not judging them for that. My wife never has to think twice about what I'll say or think about her eating a big plate full of 10 or 12 cookies before bed, and that's the way it should be. 

 

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Guest You have a belly
8 hours ago, Mr Froggy said:

I've noticed many threads here asking for advice to get a partner into gaining but im really curious how many of you out there have ever became "victims of your own success", as it were?

I.e  how many of you have encouraged a girl to gain only for her to get so into it she blows through your usual size/weight preference limits and you needed to ask her to cut back or start working out?   

What happens when a feeder gets to proverbially have their cake and (have their feedee) eat it?   

What % of feeder guys here have no upper weight/size limit at all and are attracted purely to the act of gaining itself?

What % of you have had a limit but blew through it IRL because you were either blinded by love or you found yourself unable to notice your partner getting bigger?   

How many of you have found your preferences change over time and suddenly one day you've woken up, and noticed your formerly 180lb chubby GF is 300lbs and you think she's too big now?

 

Kinda curious about this because a recurring theme I've noticed in the FA community is the dichotomy between those who see gaining as a means to an end,  and those who come to see perpetual gaining as an end in itself.  

 

Sometimes it's a case of "Be careful what you wish for". I'm not a feeder but for some reason every girl I'm invoved with ends up gaining soem weight at some point. There are some slim/slimmish girls I've been with who I secretly wish they would get fat, and when they eventually did I realized they looked really unremarkable/unattractive, although the weight gain concept/process itself is always hot. One thing I've notice is I can find a girl's non-stop fattening hot while not necessarily finding her hotter than before.

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Guest Mr Froggy

I also wanted to express my total confusion at the apparent existence of guys who say they have a "range" of say, 150-300lbs.  

Someone saying they like 140-200, I understand;  you like chubby girls.  Someone saying 200-300, I understand;  you like fat/obese girls.... 

But to like both size brackets?  I can't relate at all.  To me,  a 300 or 400lb girl isn't even human anymore,  they may as well be from a different species.   It makes me wonder if these guys with a 'wide' preference range truly DO like girls of such a wide size range or if they're actually just closet hard-core feeders.  I.e they only like the 150lb girl because they love the thought she's already "broken the seal" and is part way to becoming 300...  

 

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50 minutes ago, Mr Froggy said:

I also wanted to express my total confusion at the apparent existence of guys who say they have a "range" of say, 150-300lbs.  

Someone saying they like 140-200, I understand;  you like chubby girls.  Someone saying 200-300, I understand;  you like fat/obese girls.... 

But to like both size brackets?  I can't relate at all.  To me,  a 300 or 400lb girl isn't even human anymore,  they may as well be from a different species.   It makes me wonder if these guys with a 'wide' preference range truly DO like girls of such a wide size range or if they're actually just closet hard-core feeders.  I.e they only like the 150lb girl because they love the thought she's already "broken the seal" and is part way to becoming 300...  

 

Let me clarify why I put such a wide range: take my ex, she was 5'9" and she was a large framed girl. 300 was perfect on her. Take my 5'2" wife, at 300 she would be a very different shape than my ex. Really I shouldn't have listed a weight range that I prefer, but rather a shape range. I like bellies, boobs, and butts to be defined. I don't care for the blob shape. I feel like most women have a certain weight at which all of the fat just blends together into one big blob. It all depends on body type. It also depends on age. 

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well,,, i guess everyone has their own too big version. personally i would say health concerns may be the limit. otherwise, lets go with the flow mister. and in any case, it is their body i would not stop anyone on gaining or losing by that matter

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for the sake of the conversation, my girl is really short at 5'1 so, currently at almost 200 pounds she looks good but i do think she can go at least to 250 without problems, 300 why not, the thing is i do not think she would take it lightly or peacefully, that would be a big gain and would imply a new wardrobe and going from curvy to distinctly obese and that is not always to accept gracefully. they say very easily i am curvy and chubby but that sounds differently from i am morbidly obese and i get out of breath after a few stairs

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My wife has never come close to blowing through any barriers I may have. BUT I was generally not prepared for how different of a lifestyle change it would be with her heavier; how much more work I would have to do around the house, how many more errands I would need to take off her plate. Anything that involves a lot of walking is simply off the table it seems (walking the dog, taking the kids to the park, etc). That took some time to get used to, especially since my wife used to be quite fit and active. 

I also am not a binge movie watcher. No matter how hard I try, there's no way I can plop on the couch and watch 7-9hrs straight of Netflix a night like her. So there's that unmutual pairing of hobbies/interests that take some time to work out. 

Lastly, $. Few people talk about the shear literal price of feeding someone to an obese size. I would do mental scratch math of how many vacations we could have taken or major home upgrades we could have made with the tens of thousands in food over the last few years. It's just a black hole of a money pit that gets larger and stronger as their waistline grows.

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16 hours ago, BindsThatTie said:

My wife has never come close to blowing through any barriers I may have. BUT I was generally not prepared for how different of a lifestyle change it would be with her heavier; how much more work I would have to do around the house, how many more errands I would need to take off her plate. Anything that involves a lot of walking is simply off the table it seems (walking the dog, taking the kids to the park, etc). That took some time to get used to, especially since my wife used to be quite fit and active. 

I also am not a binge movie watcher. No matter how hard I try, there's no way I can plop on the couch and watch 7-9hrs straight of Netflix a night like her. So there's that unmutual pairing of hobbies/interests that take some time to work out. 

Lastly, $. Few people talk about the shear literal price of feeding someone to an obese size. I would do mental scratch math of how many vacations we could have taken or major home upgrades we could have made with the tens of thousands in food over the last few years. It's just a black hole of a money pit that gets larger and stronger as their waistline grows.

How much did she weigh when you met? What does she weigh now?

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She weighed 110 when we met. 225 last doctor appt; she had high cholesterol and was pre-diabetic. So her gain was tempered recently. But now that her bloods have come back normal due to the meds, she's been slipping back into her old ways and started gaining again. I don't know what she exactly weighs right now. She's not a massive 300lb girl, but the change from her petite ultra-skinny frame has been quite dramatic to me. More than doubling in size in just a few years.

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On 12/7/2020 at 4:06 PM, Mr Froggy said:

To me,  a 300 or 400lb girl isn't even human anymore,  they may as well be from a different species.

Hi Froggy,

I get that these are your personal opinions being expressed here, but if I were to suggest that your comment lacks tact, that would be an understatement.
We are a community that takes pride in the empowerment of women and the appreciation of their curves. Having said that, there is a basic level of respect, decorum and decency expected.
Literally dehumanizing others by suggesting that a women who doesn't meet your preference isn't human is probably in poor taste at best, but at worst, likely very hurtful.
I am going to kindly ask that when having discussion, we keep it appropriate. If you must talk about your preferences, it will suffice to simply state them without putting others down.

Thank you :)

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On December 8, 2020 at 12:07 PM, BindsThatTie said:

My wife has never come close to blowing through any barriers I may have. BUT I was generally not prepared for how different of a lifestyle change it would be with her heavier; how much more work I would have to do around the house, how many more errands I would need to take off her plate. Anything that involves a lot of walking is simply off the table it seems (walking the dog, taking the kids to the park, etc). That took some time to get used to, especially since my wife used to be quite fit and active. 

I also am not a binge movie watcher. No matter how hard I try, there's no way I can plop on the couch and watch 7-9hrs straight of Netflix a night like her. So there's that unmutual pairing of hobbies/interests that take some time to work out. 

Lastly, $. Few people talk about the shear literal price of feeding someone to an obese size. I would do mental scratch math of how many vacations we could have taken or major home upgrades we could have made with the tens of thousands in food over the last few years. It's just a black hole of a money pit that gets larger and stronger as their waistline grows.

This is interesting to hear and other than the food bill, I never thought about most of these things.  The heaviest woman I ever briefly dated was about 5'-6", 330 pounds, and gorgeous.  We once had like an 18 hour long date which included driving to a few beaches, then walking down each beach.  I never once had any idea that she was tired or uncomfortable.  Of course, that was just one particular date and not a long term relationship, so maybe she was just a good sport.

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On 12/7/2020 at 4:06 PM, Mr Froggy said:

But to like both size brackets?

I like women in general. Whether they're 120 pounds or 500 pounds. They're ALL human. I dont understand saying they cease being human. Liking a wide range of size is something a lot of people do - just like finding a wide range of races attractive. 

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I will start off by saying that my tastes have increased over time. When I was a teenager, I thought 200 was a dream. But that was probably due to the fact that the “fat” girls at that age were 180-185. In college, I didn’t find many girls under 200 attractive. My “range” went to 200-250.
 

I dated a 6’ woman in college who was around 210 when we started dating and ended up around 275 after 2.5 years. And she grew in all of the best spots. Huge ass/thighs/hips and big boobs. But she didn’t really grow a fat belly. And I didn’t really know better at the time. I just liked that she had outgrown a number of pant sizes. She never got close to outgrowing my preference for her but that was obviously due to the fact that she was so tall. I will say for her, it did take a bunch of booze, food and $$$ to plump that tall frame up. The relationship with her solidified my attraction range of 200 (really, more like 220) to 300.

And then I met my wife. We had first met her when she was 140 lbs. We had been friends for about 4 years before we started dating. And by that time, she had already grown to about 170. Seeing as she is only 5’5” the weight filled her out more than my ex. She was about 225 when we got married. And she’s probably around 270 now. And I have to say, I am torn. She’s gotten big. Fat, hanging belly, double chin even when she isn’t looking down, thick arms, huge thighs and hips and an ass that is big and wide. I am both curious what 300 might look like and very naturally attracted to weight gain while also concerned she might “outgrow my preference” if she were to plump up to that weight. I know the added weight will just start to change her shape, as it already has to a certain extent. The classic pear shape is now a battle of focus between thighs/hips and gut. I am not attracted to the blob look but I just kind of want to see her continue indulging.

It is very interesting to think about a woman outgrowing my preferences and honestly, that thought alone is also a turn on. Interested in hearing what others think.

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I've never really thought about an actual number for my limit. I know I wouldn't want my wife to be huge, which to me depends on height and other things. But my wife is 5'2" and is currently sitting at 180 something pounds. She is very curvy, naturally wide hips and big ass, growing belly, still has curves in her waist. Her boobs have grown but they're not huge, so she's pretty hour glass shaped. So naturally, she's gotten wider, BUT her waist is starting to get wide to the point where's she's going to lose the curves there and she'll just start looking wide all over. And i feel like she would maybe lose that completely at 200lbs. So maybe I wouldn't want her to go past 200. Definitely not 250 and up, i'm not into that size. 

As for changes, I'm in a similar situation as @BindsThatTie. I have been doing a lot more chores since she gained weight. She used to be way more fit and active, used to love going to the gym, now it's really hard for her to get motivated to do it. Sometimes I would want to go do something outside, something active, and either she'll be too tired to do it or we go do it and she doesn't last long. Recently we've been buying equipment to set up a gym in our house, we're both hoping that'll help her since she won't have to drive over to a gym. If she were to lose weight, or lose some weight and build some muscle, she would look great like that too. She was 125-130 lbs when I met her and I thought she had a bangin body then too. 

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15 hours ago, Holy Trinity said:

I will start off by saying that my tastes have increased over time. When I was a teenager, I thought 200 was a dream. But that was probably due to the fact that the “fat” girls at that age were 180-185. In college, I didn’t find many girls under 200 attractive. My “range” went to 200-250.
 

I dated a 6’ woman in college who was around 210 when we started dating and ended up around 275 after 2.5 years. And she grew in all of the best spots. Huge ass/thighs/hips and big boobs. But she didn’t really grow a fat belly. And I didn’t really know better at the time. I just liked that she had outgrown a number of pant sizes. She never got close to outgrowing my preference for her but that was obviously due to the fact that she was so tall. I will say for her, it did take a bunch of booze, food and $$$ to plump that tall frame up. The relationship with her solidified my attraction range of 200 (really, more like 220) to 300.

And then I met my wife. We had first met her when she was 140 lbs. We had been friends for about 4 years before we started dating. And by that time, she had already grown to about 170. Seeing as she is only 5’5” the weight filled her out more than my ex. She was about 225 when we got married. And she’s probably around 270 now. And I have to say, I am torn. She’s gotten big. Fat, hanging belly, double chin even when she isn’t looking down, thick arms, huge thighs and hips and an ass that is big and wide. I am both curious what 300 might look like and very naturally attracted to weight gain while also concerned she might “outgrow my preference” if she were to plump up to that weight. I know the added weight will just start to change her shape, as it already has to a certain extent. The classic pear shape is now a battle of focus between thighs/hips and gut. I am not attracted to the blob look but I just kind of want to see her continue indulging.

It is very interesting to think about a woman outgrowing my preferences and honestly, that thought alone is also a turn on. Interested in hearing what others think.

From 140 to 270 is almost double her size, what does she say about it? Did she gain it all unintentionally? My gf got to 240 at 5'4" and she really did look and feel very obese. Had mixed feelings about her getting so big, but I enjoyed the huge rolls she got around her sides 😎

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Personally, I do have a limit, at least as far as attraction goes. Some of the models here started off being attractive to me but are now past the limit. I can’t put a number on it because people of different heights carry weight much differently. my ideal is probably 180, 200 is great, and from then on up it gets slightly less attractive incrementally. My girlfriend is 5’4” 190-200ish. She is not in any means a gainer Or stuffer or anything like that, and actually hates her body, she just gained a lot of weight throughout Highschool. ( no I didn’t do it to her against her will, I’m not like that. I personally think that’s a shitty thing to do. consent is key.) She’s understanding about me liking it though. She just wants the weight gone. And I’m very willing to help her lose weight and go down to a ‘normal’ body weight, because I love her for her and not her body. If she were to continue gaining, and eventually stop being what I would consider to be attractive, it really wouldn’t change much cause I still love her for her.
 
And I know it’s off topic a bit, but it is important. in the end, all that  REALLY matters about a woman’s weight is HER perception of it. What matters is that she is the weight she wants to be. Only misery comes from people wanting to be thin but being fat and vice versa. Don’t ever force anyone to be in a situation where they hate their own body. If your girlfriend has passed your ‘limit” AND wants to lose weight, help her to lose weight. If she feels happy as she is, don’t make her change for you.

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9 hours ago, stauber said:

From 140 to 270 is almost double her size, what does she say about it? Did she gain it all unintentionally? My gf got to 240 at 5'4" and she really did look and feel very obese. Had mixed feelings about her getting so big, but I enjoyed the huge rolls she got around her sides 😎

All unintentional. Just a combination of no longer being that high school athlete and then dating and living with me tapped into her naturally indulgent side. And she knows I like her bigger, so she goes between liking the fact that she’s able to be indulgent and not have a partner grossed out by her and then the unsaid peer pressure of not wanting to be the fat friend. There have been times when she laments how big she’s gotten.

I have also had to take over most of the chores. But she knows that she can get anything she wants by simply dressing in something that accentuates her growth. She might have a love/hate relationship with all of her (growing) curves but she absolutely uses them to her advantage with me.

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The only time I had negative thoughts in this vein was last summer when a group of my college buddies organized a hiking trip at this state park about 4hrs away. My wife was convinced she wanted to go. I tried talking her out of it, but she really wanted to see these old acquaintances and she used to love hiking.

Right off the bat, she had to continually stop at gas stations the entire way that made us late and was starting to irritate my friends in the car. Wanting to hit the trail, my friends then conceded to her to eat an early lunch before starting. She gorged on this ridiculous fried chicken meal w/multiple appetizers. Once we got to the gorge, the trail was quite challenging and my wife was struggling within 25min: sweating profusely, can't catch her breath, knees aching, needing to take stops that had us way behind my friends. After about an hour and half my friends noticed how bad she was struggling and called an end to what was supposed to be a nice communal day long hike. Once back at the car, she of course awkwardly brought up eating again.

Every time my wife brought up "are you guys hungry" they responded "not really".The whole day was quite a sh*t show. And two of my buddies hadn't seen her since she gained 100lbs. I think they were just stunned at what a completely different person she was. It left me questioning "gosh, how is she going to be if she gains another 100?"

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I don't really know what my upper limit is. In high school, beginning to come to terms with and understand this preference, I lusted after BBW girls but not SSBBWs (although these were quite rare). The ceiling sort of slowly expanded from there...except that I'm not into "600 lb life" and I'm not attracted to immobility or significant disability. I do, however, find it kinda hot when she's fat enough that it causes some inconveniences (not fitting into restaurant booths, struggling with clothes, that sort of thing). Also, and I've never really known how to express this, there is a different kind of fascination for me between a hot overweight gal and a really huge gal. The former is a pure, clear desire, the latter a murkier sort of sexual awe. So it's a vague boundary.

6 hours ago, BindsThatTie said:

The only time I had negative thoughts in this vein was last summer when a group of my college buddies organized a hiking trip at this state park about 4hrs away. My wife was convinced she wanted to go. I tried talking her out of it, but she really wanted to see these old acquaintances and she used to love hiking.

Right off the bat, she had to continually stop at gas stations the entire way that made us late and was starting to irritate my friends in the car. Wanting to hit the trail, my friends then conceded to her to eat an early lunch before starting. She gorged on this ridiculous fried chicken meal w/multiple appetizers. Once we got to the gorge, the trail was quite challenging and my wife was struggling within 25min: sweating profusely, can't catch her breath, knees aching, needing to take stops that had us way behind my friends. After about an hour and half my friends noticed how bad she was struggling and called an end to what was supposed to be a nice communal day long hike. Once back at the car, she of course awkwardly brought up eating again.

Every time my wife brought up "are you guys hungry" they responded "not really".The whole day was quite a sh*t show. And two of my buddies hadn't seen her since she gained 100lbs. I think they were just stunned at what a completely different person she was. It left me questioning "gosh, how is she going to be if she gains another 100?"

Some good posts on this thread about the more challenging aspects which can accompany being with a SSBBW. There's no question - if you are into very large partners AND enjoy an active lifestyle AND expect your partner to participate in that lifestyle, you're probably headed for a collision. And there is also no question that, if the relationship is long term, you are at higher risk of having a partner with significant health issues, unfortunately.

For me, some of the problem dissolves simply because I never expected my partner and I to do everything together, necessarily. I'm perfectly happy to do activity X with my friends, or solo, if she's not into it. That removes many potential areas of conflict or frustration. On the other hand, there are still worries. We never traveled much but we've talked about visiting Europe within the next few years, assuming COVID permits. But she's 320 lbs right now, moves slowly, and gets physically tired quite easily. Given her tendency to steadily gain 7-8 lbs per year, she could well be closer to 335-340 by the time we're getting serious about it. Imagine paying thousands on a vacation and then not being able to see the sights, spending most of your time in cafes or sitting on benches, because your partner is too fat to walk a lot?

This sort of thing is totally different from the question of finding a person "too big" to be physically attractive. It can definitely put limits on your lifestyle as a couple though. A mature FA should think about these possibilities and not be blindsided by them, IMHO.

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On 12/20/2020 at 11:08 AM, BindsThatTie said:

The only time I had negative thoughts in this vein was last summer when a group of my college buddies organized a hiking trip at this state park about 4hrs away. My wife was convinced she wanted to go. I tried talking her out of it, but she really wanted to see these old acquaintances and she used to love hiking.

Right off the bat, she had to continually stop at gas stations the entire way that made us late and was starting to irritate my friends in the car. Wanting to hit the trail, my friends then conceded to her to eat an early lunch before starting. She gorged on this ridiculous fried chicken meal w/multiple appetizers. Once we got to the gorge, the trail was quite challenging and my wife was struggling within 25min: sweating profusely, can't catch her breath, knees aching, needing to take stops that had us way behind my friends. After about an hour and half my friends noticed how bad she was struggling and called an end to what was supposed to be a nice communal day long hike. Once back at the car, she of course awkwardly brought up eating again.

Every time my wife brought up "are you guys hungry" they responded "not really".The whole day was quite a sh*t show. And two of my buddies hadn't seen her since she gained 100lbs. I think they were just stunned at what a completely different person she was. It left me questioning "gosh, how is she going to be if she gains another 100?"

Did you encourage her to gain weight?

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