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Consumption of Champions (NEW PART ADDED 6/20/2022)


Cyril Figgis

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((I hope I'm not too late to the fantasy party!  I've been mulling over this sort of story for a while--both a fantasy and a male-centric weight gain story--and I finally decided to get in on it.  I know that this might not be the best place for a BHM story, but I hope that you all enjoy it.  Do let me know what you think, as I'd like to do more stories in this universe!))

THE WIDENING WARRIOR AND THE ALCHEMIST

It was a cool autumn day in the kingdom of Tantris, where the trees grow strong and tall, the rains are never fierce, and a song can always be heard in the wind.  The crisp air and fallen leaves made travel a delight along most any road, but especially the Queen’s Road, which was a scenic route that led to the royal castle.  Travelers of all kinds made their way up and down the road: merchants peddling their wares, wanderers trekking across the land, and adventurers in search of their next quest, among countless others.  One of the latter was making his way down the long road with a sword on his back, modest clothes, and little else.

Wade Leguerrier was an impressive young man who stood out in most any crowd, be it his height, fantastical hair, or his slab of iron that he called a sword.  He stood as tall as a Solstice tree; so long was he that they had not made the bed that could fit him.  His head was covered with a thick mat of sapphire locks that were as spiky as a rosebush.  The beastly longsword on his back was so tall that the hilt reached above his head and came within a hair’s breadth of grazing the ground as he walked; by the same token, it was so broad that it could be used as a proper shield.  Naturally, carrying around such a monstrosity required great strength, which Wade was thankfully blessed with in spades.

His sleeveless tunic left his powerful arms, lean and muscular, for all the world to see.  If one were to catch him without his shirt, they would have found a body that looked to be chiseled by a master sculptor; there was nary a trace of fat anywhere on him.  His legs were much the same, resembling those of an athlete than your average adventurer.  The only things that marred his physical perfection were the scars across his body, including one ran down his face from his right temple to the bottom of his left cheek.  He was what people imagined a warrior of old to be, yet he had barely seen twenty-one summers and had only recently begun his adventures.

As the young fighter walked along happily munching on an apple, he heard what sounded like a scuffle just around the bend.  Tossing his apple to the woods, he ran towards the commotion and came upon a not uncommon scene on the Queen’s Road: bandits assailing a merchant and no sign of a sheriff to stop them.  Wade sighed as he strode up to the scene, his hand on the hilt of his sword, a fire in his eyes, and a growl at his lips.

“Excuse me, but something tells me that’s not your cart,” the warrior called out to the bandits. “Care to tell me why you’re ripping it apart then?”

“Mind your business, stranger; this don’t concern you,” growled one of the brigands, a jagged dirk in his gloved hand.

As he walked closer despite more of the goons turning to him with weapons drawn, Wade counted five men thereabout.  He retorted, “I swore my oath to defend the innocent wheresoever I go; so yes, this does concern me.”

When the last of the crooks turned from the cart to face him, a small head popped up from behind the damaged wagon.  It looked to be a goblin girl with skin as green as a mint leaf, hair the color of cherry blossoms, and freckles dotting her face like stars on a night sky.  The girl stared wide-eyed and fearful, and that strengthened the fighter’s resolve even more.  He slowly pulled his sword free, the sight of which made a couple of the bandits back away in fear.

Their leader, a ruffian with wiry hair and a thick face, grunted, “Stand your ground, cowards.  It’s all for show; I bet that thing is as useful as a shield of leaves.  Brokko, take him.”

Brokko, a burly brute that looked more like a monkey than a man, ran forward with a hefty hatchet in hand.  Before he could get anywhere close to striking distance, Wade swung his sword out and caught the bandit in the ribs.  The blade was wedged in Brokko’s body for a moment until the sheer weight of the sword sent him flying into a tree.  The display made the weakest of the brigands quiver in his boots, but the boss would not be deterred.

“Ratcher, Pronk, get the bastard!” he shouted as two more goons raced ahead.

The putrid pair were handled with ease by the warrior, who seemed almost bored by their attempt on his life.  When they drew their weapons back, he brought the blade up to parry them; striking such a weapon sent a shock through their arm as though they had hit a rock.  In the blink of an eye, Wade brought the blade down across both their bodies, which almost cut Pronk clean in two and left Ratcher with his guts spilling out on the ground.

That was too much for the leader, who only grew more rageful as his men were cut down like saplings.  He pointed his dirk at Wade and roared, “You might have killed those worthless maggots, but Ernst will be the death of you!”

Unfortunately, Ernst’s attack was as successful as his lackies’, which was to say not at all.  Wade waited until he was just in range before he brought the sword down on the bandit’s head, not only driving the blade through his skull but also crushing him like a piece of paper.  The crook crumpled to the ground like a puppet with its strings cut, and yet his assailant had not even broken a sweat.  It was the final straw for the last sniveling coward, and he took off in a sprint down the road.  He did not get far before a bottle full of a red liquid shattered against him and exploded in a brilliant flame.

“That’ll learn ya, sons of whores!” the goblin girl jeered as she walked out from behind her cart and over towards her savior.  She was a tiny thing, like most goblins, and she came up to about the middle of Wade’s thigh.  Around her petite body was a gray apron, behind which the boy could see a top that left most of her abdomen exposed and black pants that accentuated her curvy hips and legs.

When she got close to Wade, she extended her hand in gratitude as she said, “Much obliged, stranger!  My cart got caught in a pothole, and those dastards decided to jump me while they had the chance.  Lucky they couldn’t break in; I’m carrying around a small fortune in potions and elixirs!”

“Lucky indeed,” the warrior chuckled before glancing at the cart. “How much does it weigh?”

“I would need all twenty of my brothers and sisters to move it,” the goblin sighed before glancing over to Wade. “You might be able to swing that blade like it was a rag, but you’re not going to be able to lift that thing on your own.”

The muscular man smirked down at the merchant before sauntering over to the cart and crouching beside it.  He took a deep breath, gripped the side, and then hoisted it free of the hole it was lodged in as though it weighed no more than a brick.  The cart righted itself again and Wade inspected it to make sure there was no great damage from the bandits.

“Looks like you’re good to go!” he exclaimed as the goblin girl ran over with a gob-smacked look on her freckled face.  She gestured back and forth between the cart and Wade, stunned that this beansprout of a man was able to lift something so heavy, which earned a good-hearted chuckle from the warrior.  “I’m stronger than I look.”

“Boy, you are just full of surprises,” she giggled as she walked back around the cart. “I thought I was done for, and then here you come with a chunk of iron on your back and muscles for days.  You need something for your troubles, and I won’t take no for an answer.”

The warrior shook his head and waved his hand. “That’s mighty generous of you, but I can’t—”

“Not taking no for an answer!” she butted in as she dug around in her cart. “I don’t have much in the way of spare gold, but I think I’ve got just the thing for a big’un like yourself.  Aha!”

When she popped back out, the goblin had a vial of green liquid in her hand.  She passed it along to Wade and explained, “That there is a strength elixir I’m cooking up; you get to have the first taste!”

“Not that I don’t doubt your talent, but is it safe?” the fighter asked as he swished the elixir around.

“Safe as can be!” the merchant exclaimed as she puffed her chest up with pride. “That right there gets the Audra Dranghy Seal of Approval!”

The blue haired boy laughed and retorted, “All right then.  Let’s see if it meets the Wade Leguerrier Seal of Approval.”

With that, he popped the cork off and tilted the vial to his lips.  His eyes lit up as he downed the verdant drink in two gulps, and he pulled it away with a gasp of surprise.  Wade remarked, “Well, I’ll be damned.  It might look like swamp water, but it tastes like an apple tart…with cinnamon, no less!  That’s a mighty fine concoction, Audra.”

The green girl beamed like sunshine as she took the empty beaker back. “Much obliged!  I’m hoping to make this a regular feature in my wares; there are lots of people that’d pay top dollar to feel stronger.”

“I should say so,” the fighter remarked.  Just then, he heard his stomach gurgle and he put a hand to his abs.  He felt like he had not eaten in a week, and to make matter worse, he had not a crumb on him.  Audra must have sensed this, as she returned to her cart and came back with a loaf of bread and a couple pieces of fruit.  As soon as she offered them up, the warrior eagerly took them and tore off a third of the loaf with his teeth.

“Gods, I’m sorry,” he muttered to the alchemist, “I don’t know what’s come over me, but I feel hungrier than I’ve ever been my entire life!”

Audra waved off the apology. “S’okay; I would be surprised if you weren’t.  It’s a common side effect of booster potions; your body needs more nutrients to go along with the new muscles you’re building.  If you need more, I’ve got plenty of food where that came from.”

Wade shook his head. “Oh, I couldn’t possibly.  I don’t want to eat up your stocks.”

“Honestly, you’d be doing me a favor!  Goblins only need a little bit of food every day, like how I had a few berries for breakfast.  I always tend to get too much, and it all goes to waste, so you’d be helping me a ton.  Think of it as another form of payment for saving my bacon,” the petite girl explained.

It all sounded good to the starving warrior, who quickly devoured the bread and apples like some voracious beast.  After spitting out the last of the apple seeds, Wade grinned and said, “All right then.  I just hope you’ve got enough; I feel like I could eat a wyvern!  I haven’t been this hungry since I fasted for training.”

“Afraid I’m fresh out of wyverns,” Audra snickered as she went back to her cart for more food.  She returned with another loaf of bread, a wedge of cheese, and some milk to wash it all down with.  Again, Wade all but ripped them from her hands and stuffed his mouth as full as he could, which was not that far off from his usual table manners.

In between bites, he asked the goblin, “Where are you heading?”

“I’ll be stopping in Riverton to restock, and then I’ll be heading to Moonfall; that’s where I get some of my biggest sales every year,” she answered, “What about you?  Looking for a tourney?  Mercenary work?  Off to save a damsel?”

Wade took a long draught of milk before he told Audra, “Questing.  I was going to stop in Riverton for the night and then make my way to Moonfall in search of some information.”

“An adventurer!  How exciting,” the goblin cooed in delight as she clapped her hands together. “Y’know, I always wanted to go on an adventure; were it not for my life’s work here, I would run off in a heartbeat.”

“Tell you what: if you’ll have me, I can accompany you to Moonfall; it’ll be like an abbreviated adventure,” the warrior suggested with a smile.

Audra giggled and stuck out her hand. “It’d be a pleasure.  If nothing else, you can be my guard in case any other bandits get the bright idea to attack us.”

“Then I guess we’re a party,” Wade chuckled as he shook the girl’s tiny hand in his own massive mitt after switching the food to one hand. “We should probably start up again; we’ll want to make Riverton before sundown.”

“Agreed,” the alchemist said with a nod.  She trotted around to the front of the cart, lifted the handle bar from the ground, and pulled the bulky bundle along with some effort.  No wonder why: the whole cart was bigger than she was and weighed more than five or six of her.  Before she could go much further, Wade stopped her with a gentle hand on her shoulder.

“Let me,” he offered as he took the handle from her and proceeded to pull the cart along as though it weighed as little as a feather.  As he walked along, he finished the last of the cheese before stifling a belch; hungry as he was, he had eaten a touch too fast for his stomach.

Audra trotted along happily now that she did not have to worry about pulling her cart along for a few days.  It was serendipitous that the warrior should come along to help her, and such a strong one at that; she had never seen anyone so slim and strong before.  Now she was traveling on this warrior’s quest, albeit for the three weeks it would take to travel to Moonfall.  Regardless of how brief it was, the alchemist was tickled pink by the idea that she was an adventurer and not some miserable merchant.  She would have to thank him the only way she knew how: free potions and food until they got to their destination; perhaps even beyond Moonfall, if she played her cards right.

***

They managed to reach the bustling village of Riverton a little before sundown, when folks were making their way home and businesses were closing for the day.  Audra, much more versed in traveling, directed Wade to an inn that she frequented every time she came to town.  The softest beds for miles, she had said.  After the day he had, Wade would put that to the test; he felt like he would fall asleep at the drop of a hat.  Before he could think about sleep though, the goblin girl suggested they have dinner, as the innkeeper’s wife made the best dishes.  The warrior was still feeling bloated from the big lunch earlier, but his stomach was growling like a hungry dog and demanding more sustenance.

Thankfully, they were just in time for that night’s dinner: a simmering bowl of corn chowder with salted bread to accompany it.  Wade tried to limit his eating but could not help asking for seconds and even thirds, which earned him a playful chide from the innkeeper.

“I do believe you’ve had enough, young man; we must leave some for the other guests, ay?” asked the matronly woman.  She collected his bowl and winked while she told him, “Besides, you’ll want to save your appetite for tomorrow morning; I’ll be making my world-famous creamy egg pie.  And if you’re up early enough, I might be able to slide you a few extra slices.”

The warrior cracked a grin as he remarked, “If it’s as good as the chowder, I would appreciate that very much.”

By the time he got to his room, Wade was so drowsy that as soon as his bed was within reach, he collapsed onto it without a second thought.  Audra shook her head and chuckled at the display from her traveling companion before taking off his boots and sliding the lanky wanderer onto the mattress proper.  While the blue haired boy snoozed, the petite alchemist went down to her cart in the stables to work on some potions for the following day.  One could never be sure when they would meet a customer on the Queen’s Road, after all, and she wanted to have a little something for her savior when he woke up again.

“I think he’ll like this lots and lots,” Audra remarked with a smile as she swished a familiar green liquid around. “Strapping fellow like himself would probably appreciate a good boost of strength, especially if he’s so keen on questing.”

After getting back to her bed in the wee hours of the morning, the goblin girl awoke and found that Wade was gone.  A quick glance at a pocket watch showed that it was time for breakfast, and if his appetite was as strong as yesterday, that was where he would be.  When Audra made her way down to the first floor, she found her companion scarfing down more food than she could eat in a month.  The innkeeper fixed him what looked to be a third plate of egg pie accompanied with other fixings, least of all thick ribbons of bacon.

“Land’s sake, boy, you’re liable to gag if you don’t slow down,” the matron chuckled as she set the plate down before Wade.

“Oh, don’t worry; I don’t intend to die from breakfast,” the warrior smirked as he stuck an entire strip of bacon down his gullet. “Wouldn’t be fitting for a graduate of St. Duncan’s Academy.”

As Audra joined her bodyguard at the table, she asked, “You went to the academy?”

Wade nodded and swallowed a large mouthful before answering, “Sure did!  Just finished this past month, actually; graduated with top marks in combat.”

“I can see how,” the alchemist giggled as she nibbled on a slice of bread.  She would have attempted more conversation, but her warrior friend seemed so invested in his meal that she did not want to bother him.  More than that, she just enjoyed watching a man with an appetite; none of the boys back home could eat like that, even with an appetite enhancing enchantment.  To see a fellow like Wade tucking into a meal like it was a fight to the finish made her feel warm and fuzzy inside and instilled a desire to learn how to cook.

When the warrior had finally finished his breakfast, he patted his stomach as he leaned back in his chair.  He grinned appreciatively at the innkeeper and told her, “My own mother couldn’t have made better food than that.  My compliments to the chef!

“And to you, chum,” the warrior said to Audra.  He lifted an arm and gave a quick flex to show that his muscles had swollen up a good bit from yesterday. “That elixir you fixed up for me yesterday worked wonders!  It would take me months to get much bulkier, but you managed to do it in a day.”

“I knew you’d like it!  The results speak for themselves, don’t they?” asked the goblin girl with a smile.  She reached out over the table to give Wade’s bicep a squeeze, only to find that it was almost hard as a rock. “Boy, and I thought you were chiseled before.”

At the flirty remark, her bodyguard blushed and stopped flexing, though his muscles still stayed prominent.  He mumbled, “I, ah…I just remembered that I offered to help the innkeeper with a chore as payment for so much food.  I’ll be back in just a minute.”

When Wade rose from his chair, Audra noticed that his arms were not the only things that had gotten bigger, though not in a muscular sense.  His tunic stretched over a dome of a gut that jutted from his middle like a woman in the middle of her pregnancy; the bump bounced as he walked, as though he had stuffed a ball underneath his shirt.  Down below his belt, which the goblin noted was loosened a notch or two, thickened thighs filled out his pants and a rounded rump bobbled as the warrior made his way to the kitchen.

“Seems there’s a side effect I overlooked,” the alchemist whispered as she made mental notes for the next batch of elixir.

***

If Wade noticed his gain, he did not say anything about it, though Audra caught glimpses of him as they traveled down the Queen’s Road.  His new weight did nothing to impact pulling the potion cart; if anything, it only made things easier.  Before they left town, Audra had been sure to stock up on more food for their trip, knowing full well how hungry the warrior was going to be every time he drank another elixir.  Again, he asked no questions about getting any extra supplies, opting instead to lick his chops at the selection of food the alchemist purchased.

When they stopped for lunch, the celadon girl offered up a new bottle of strength elixir to her bodyguard, who eyed it with careful curiosity.  Wade swished the elixir around and asked, “Is it safe to take another one after yesterday?  I’d swear there was some rule about not taking permanent boosts daily.”

“Yeah, there is—live a little,” the goblin answered with a smirk. “Or are you seriously telling me you’re going to pass on enough strength to crush boulders with your bare hands?”

“All right, I’ll have more,” the warrior replied, “but don’t think I don’t know what’s going on.”

Audra’s nerves kicked in and her heart skipped a beat. “Wh-What do you mean?”

“I’ve known some alchemists in my time at the academy, and they’re all the same.  Everyone’s a guinea pig,” Wade explained, though the grin on his face made the answer feel more jovial than cynical.  He quaffed the elixir down and lapped his lips for any extra drops; it truly was one of the tastier concoctions he had ever imbibed.  “Still, if you keep this recipe, I might just be your permanent guinea pig if it means getting more.”

A wave of relief washed over the potion maker as she settled back in her seat with a confident smirk that belied her anxious nerves. “Then I hope you’re ready, because I want to make sure that elixir is perfect by the time I get to Moonfall.”

Wade’s stomach growled in response.  The young warrior blushed and patted the soft swell of his gut before saying, “Only if you’ve got enough food to last us the whole trip.”

Audra knew she had more than enough to sustain Wade throughout their journey, even if his appetite and capacity escalated with each new elixir.  It was a good thing she did, as every time he drank the strength-enhancing potion, the warrior grew as ravenous as a swarm of locusts.  He devoured food like there was no tomorrow; it did not matter if it was cooked in a meal or not.  Starting each day with a new elixir left him starving throughout the entire day, which meant that he was almost constantly eating from morning till night.

As expected, the effects were obvious with each passing day.  Wade’s arms were more muscular than they had ever been by the third day of their travels, and they only grew more so as the days passed.  His bicep alone was as big as a grapefruit when he flexed, which gave him the appearance of a seasoned veteran rather than a greenhorn.  Those were the only parts of his body that were muscular though; everything else was coated in an ever-growing layer of blubber.  The blue haired boy’s face took on a rounder look as a second chin slowly swaddled around his neck, his thighs filled up like kegs of beer, and his backside resembled a pair of bowling balls crammed down his trousers.

Most impressive of all was his belly, which was fast becoming a mountain of pudge.  It hardly sloshed around when Wade walked, hinting at the strong abdomen underneath, and jutted out like a pregnant woman’s stomach.  It grew rounder and more prominent with each passing day, to the point that five days into their trek, the rookie warrior had a beer belly to rival the best drunkards.  Despite all these changes, Wade never noticed how much beefier and lardier he had become; his focus was solely on his immense strength.

“Audra!  Audra, watch this!” he called out one evening while gathering firewood.

The alchemist glanced up from her cart, where she was preparing another elixir, and watched as Wade waddled over to a towering tree.  He tossed his sword into the air with all the ease of throwing a twig, caught it single-handedly, and slammed the blade into the trunk.  Audra expected it to wedge into the tree, but much to her shock and awe, the sword went straight through in one clean chop.  As it came tumbling down, Wade raised his thick arms and jumped in victory, though he got little air in doing so.

“Did you see that?” he asked excitedly. “It used to take four swings, but that was one fell swoop!  I took that tree down in one blow!”

“Yes, you certainly did,” Audra mumbled, distracted as she was by how Wade’s tunic had risen to reveal a great swath of doughy blubber.  “By the time we get to Moonfall, you might just be able to break boulders with your bare hands.”

“You think so?  That would be swell,” Wade remarked as he wiped the sweat from his brow, which caused a few threads to pop under his arm.  “I had a friend back at St. Duncan’s who could do that, but he was a monk; I’ll never understand how they can break rocks and punch through armor when they’re thinner than a broomstick.”

Audra hummed in agreement, though her mind was far from the conversation.  It was far more fun to watch Wade’s thick backside wobble about in his trousers, bouncing about from side to side and threatening to destroy the seam across the seat with every movement.  She could never have anticipated that he would plump up the way he had, but she was not about to argue with the results, even if he was eating his way through their supplies with abandon.  Most curious of all was how the widening warrior had failed to register his growth, even as his newfound curves tested his clothes at every turn.  If he kept expanding, he would be waddling into Moonfall in rags, which made the pint-sized alchemist turn a fine gray—a goblin’s blush.

As Wade took the tree apart bit by bit, he glanced over his shoulder at his companion while she worked on her potions and wondered how he had gotten so lucky.  His first time out on the road and he stumbled into the company of an alchemist that was not only incredibly talented but cute as a button and clever as a fox.  In his time at the academy, Wade had more than his share of ladies from every walk of life, as was befitting of an accomplished athlete like himself, but he had never been with a girl that enticed him quite like Audra did. 

For one so bookish, she had the tight body that many a maiden would kill for: a lean stomach as flat as a board, modest breasts that were no bigger than apples, and a curvy backside that filled out her pants just right.  She was also not afraid to flaunt her figure, regularly walking around with her abdomen exposed, her jade skin drinking in the sun like hungry ivy.  All this would have attracted his gaze, but he was also fascinated with how well-versed she was in so many subjects, from the myriad elements that went into her elixirs to the fauna they passed on their way to Moonfall.  Wade would be the first to admit that he was not a knowledgeable man and hated studying in school, but Audra somehow found a way to make learning fun.

All of which was to say that he thought himself blessed to be traveling with her, and he hoped that when they reached their destination, she might allow him to accompany her a while longer.  It would be a shame to part with her so soon, especially when they were just starting to really get to know each other.  He just hoped that she did not mind his newfound appetite: as much as he wanted to believe the old saying that the best way to a man’s heart was through his stomach, he did not want to come off like a pig.  It was bad enough that he was already a lug that could never keep up whenever she got into the finer parts of alchemy; he would hate for her to think he was some sort of slob.

The warrior was pulled from his thoughts by the sound of threads popping in his shirt.  He glanced down at his side and saw how the seam was coming undone, creating a gap that allowed a dollop of tanned pudge to peek out.  Curious, he disregarded the glob of flab that poked through and circled the damaged seam with his finger tip, gauging how bad it truly was.  It was the third such sign of wear and tear on his tunic in the last week, which could only lead to one conclusion.

“I must be wearing out this old rag,” Wade decided, oblivious to the real cause for his failing wardrobe.  “I’ve had these for a few years now, so it might be time to put them out to pasture.  When we get to Moonfall, I’ll have to see about visiting a tailor; I’m sure the last thing Audra wants to see is me wandering around in rags.”

***

As the second week on the road passed, it became impossible for even Wade to remain oblivious to his gains.  His fears were coming to pass, as his traveling clothes broke apart and covered less of his body with each passing day.  Not only did his tunic no longer cover his entire stomach, but it had torn so many seams up both sides that it had become a poncho of sorts.  Likewise, his trousers were popping along his thighs like sausage casings, allowing little dollops of blubber to peek out.  The warrior was grateful that he had not split the seat of his pants yet, but he knew that it was only a matter of time.

“Say, Audra, can I ask you something?” Wade hummed to his companion one night.

“Dinner will be ready in just a little bit, I promise,” the alchemist assured her hefty friend while she tended to a ** of stew.  “Want another loaf of bread while you wait?”

“Yes—I mean, no,” the warrior corrected himself.  “I wanted to ask you something…something that’s been bothering me that last few days.  Do you think I’m getting fat?”

The question nearly made Audra drop her ladle in the cauldron and she glanced back at Wade, who sat on the trunk of a tree he had cut down.  Was he getting fat?  No, he was already fat and only getting fatter.  He was a far cry from the lean, ropy young man she had met not a fortnight prior; he was not even the thick, bulky warrior from the week before.  The man before her was fat enough that he would fit in perfectly at a circus sideshow, not traveling the roads as a wandering adventurer.

Wade’s handsome face was swaddled in so much fat that he had lost any semblance of a neck and had cheeks that seemed permanently stuffed.  A fine layer of pudge accumulated across his broad shoulders and down his arms, filling them with so much flab that even his increasingly powerful biceps found it hard to make themselves known.  Even his hands seemed to be fatter, for his palms were pliable like a meat patty and his fingers thick like sausages.

Once, the warrior used to bounce his pecs around as a party trick to entice women back to his room.  His chest could still bounce, yes, but not under his control; the flabby breasts wobbled about like gelatin with every awkward step he took, whether he liked it or not.  They were becoming generous handfuls that reminded him of a satyr he had after a jousting tournament the previous spring, though her breasts were far perkier while his just sloped down his chest like melted ice cream.  Though they remained covered by his tunic, they were abundantly clear through the overtaxed fabric.

They sat atop a belly that defied belief, especially when one considered that Wade had clearly defined abs not two weeks prior.  It had started like a drunkard’s gut—round as a balloon and jutting out from his waist as though he had stuffed a pillow up his shirt.  As the days ticked by and his stomach gained more heft, the great mound of blubber began to droop down and slap against the top of his thighs and filled a third of his lap when he sat down.  It continued to creep outward and obscure more of the ground before him, but for the last few days, his new pounds settled above his hips.  Flabby flanks filled out underneath his tunic and aided in the shirt’s demise, and fluffy rolls bunched up along his back.

He was not spared below the belt either, as his legs had thickened to the size of juicy ham hocks over the last several days.  His thighs brushed against each other more each day, and Wade noted with some embarrassment that his manhood was being encroached on by the rising tide of flab.  While his hips had remained fairly narrow, his backside had expanded into full globes of bubbly pudge, so much so that even one of his cheeks would overfill both his hands.  Any bigger, and Audra could have used it as a shelf for her potions.

Not that the goblin mentioned any of this to her bulging bodyguard.  She actually found the words catching in her throat as she drank in how perfectly plump and rolly-poly he had become.  Wade shifted about under her gaze and told Audra, “Um…you’re drooling.”

“Wh—oh!  Sorry,” the alchemist apologized as she wiped the little dribble from her cheek.  “Must be this stew!  You want three bowls or four?”

“Four—wait, three—no, I mean…guh,” Wade grunted in frustration.  “I can’t keep eating like I have!  I swear, it feels like I’m ten pounds bigger after every meal.  If I keep this up, I’m going to get too fat to swing a sword, much less go questing!”

Audra bit her lip to stifle the pleasurable hum bubbling up inside her.  The thought of her wide, wobbly warrior waddling through the woods, fat legs rolling about in a vain attempt at anything faster than a slothful plod, tickled her fancy something fierce.  Not that she would dare admit it, especially when he was so concerned about his weight at the moment.  She would assuage his fears, downplay the gain, and get his mind off the topic, same as she had done for the last several days.  After all, why stop when they had such a good thing going?

“Oh, pish, you’re not getting fat,” Audra assured Wade as she sauntered over to her seated companion.  “Haven’t you ever heard of bulking?  Don’t they teach that at the academy?”

A pink blush crept into Wade’s cheeks and he rubbed the back of his neck as he replied, “Not really, no.  What’s ‘bulking’?”

“It’s something gladiators and berserkers do to get as big as they are!  You eat a lot, put on a couple pounds, and then work it all down to rock hard muscle,” Audra explained, leaving out more than a few key details in the plan.

Despite the glaring holes in her description, it made some sense to Wade.  After all, he had seen some pretty beefy gladiators in his time; in fact, he had heard tale of wrestlers from the Far East who were like walking boulders.  He had also been getting impossibly strong over the last several days, growing far quicker than he had at the academy, so it stood to reason that he would bulk up a lot faster as well.  More than anything, he trusted Audra—after all, she was the brains of their partnership.

“Well, if you say so,” Wade finally conceded.  A grin sprouted on his chubby face as he flexed his right arm and told Audra, “And you may be right—give that bicep a squeeze and tell me it’s not the biggest you’ve ever seen.”

The goblin girl happily obliged and put both of her tiny hands around Wade’s beefy arm.  Her first delight was in knowing that his arm was so big around that her fingers could not even hope to touch each other.  The second and far greater was the realization that while there was certainly a powerful bicep in there, it was blanketed under a thick quilt of pillowy flab.

“Boy, if I didn’t know you any better, I’d say you were an ogre,” Audra giggled as she let go of Wade’s soft arm.  “And just imagine how much bigger it’s going to be when you burn off the few extra pounds you’ve gained!”

“I know!  I could carry a mountain on my back at that point,” the warrior boasted.  A warm smile crossed his face as he added in a humbler tone, “Thanks, Audra.  I feel a lot better.”

The alchemist wiggled her ears and grinned from ear to ear at the gargantuan galoot.  She chirped, “Hey, that’s what a party does, right?  If you ever need to talk about anything, you just let me know, okay?  It’s the least I can do for you.”

They lingered on that for a moment, a smile shared between them while supper stewed behind Audra.  The warm silence was broken when Wade’s belly gurgled like an angry beast, despite the fact that he had just eaten not long before Audra threw together the soup.  The petite goblin blushed at the noise but tittered, “Will you be wanting that bread after all?”

“You know what?  I think so,” Wade chuckled before patting his globular gut.  “And better make it four—no, five bowls tonight.  After all, the more I bulk, the stronger I’ll get in the end!”

After serving up dinner for her hefty companion, Audra sat back and watched as Wade voraciously gobbled up bowl after bowl of stew.  It was a good thing that she did not need to eat much, because at the rate he was going, there was going to be nothing left for her by the end.  To watch how Wade guzzled down his meal, one would never have guessed he had weight woes not a few minutes prior.  And while there was some small part of Audra that felt guilty for lying to such a kind, naïve soul, there was a far greater part of her that relished in seeing a few new inches of flab on the warrior with each passing day.

“I can always make a slimming potion if he really starts to worry,” the scheming alchemist assured herself as Wade’s stomach slowly rounded out with food.  “After all, he’ll realize he’s getting too big eventually, right?”

***

As the days went by and Wade continued quaffing Audra’s strength-enhancing potions, it became quite clear that he truly did not know how big he was getting.  It was a good thing that she had stocked up on more food than usual back in Riverton, since each new elixir increased her companion’s appetite a little more.  The extra rations also came in handy when it became clear that it would take a little longer than normal to reach Moonfall.  Not because of weather or taking a detour, but rather, Wade’s ever-increasing girth proved to be the biggest roadblock.

The warrior was strong enough that he could chew through metal—something he discovered when he ate a little too fast one evening and wolfed down his fork—but his stamina had fallen to record lows.  He needed to take frequent stops during the day, fell asleep early and woke up late, and moved at such a glacial pace that even a turtle could make better time than him.  Of course, Wade never chalked it up to the increasingly obvious reason and continued on as though he had only put on a few pounds and not several hundred.

It was almost a month since the duo left Riverton before they finally neared Moonfall.  Audra wagered they had another day of travel before they reached the city proper, and while she was normally excited to visit the bustling town, the alchemist found herself a little melancholic.  She was liable to do great business, but it also meant that she was likely to part ways with Wade, which felt more painful than she had imagined. 

Had they really gotten so close in their time together that she would actually miss the big lummox when their little party of two broke up?  It was certainly nice to have company on the road for a change and watching him expand like rising bread had been nothing short of scintillating, but those could not be the only reasons.  No, what made this different was that Wade was not just anyone: he listened intently to her scientific babbling even though she knew he did not understand half of it, always offered a helping hand despite his diminishing flexibility, and always put a smile on her face with his stories about life in the academy.  Wade Leguerrier might have been a lummox, but he was the sweetest lummox she had ever known.

“Hey, Audra…could you slow down a bit?” that same lummox panted.

The spritely alchemist turned back and realized that, distracted by her thoughts as she was, she had outpaced Wade by a good margin.  That was another change that took some getting used to, for Audra had gotten so used to keeping in stride with the warrior back when he was a beanpole of a man.  The fact that he was pulling her cart meant nothing; even before he started drinking her potions, the cart presented no challenge to him.  While the cart was lighter than air now, thanks to his newfound strength, he was weighed down by the sheer bulk of his body.

In the span of a month on the road, Wade had gone from having zero fat on his body to having nothing but fat on him.  He was covered in blubber from head to toe; if there was a place where fat could accumulate, it made its way there.  Were it not for his distinctive scars and sapphire hair, no one would have been able to recognize him.  His cheeks were so round and soft that his eyes were forced into a squint, his nose seemed smaller and flatter for it, and even his lips were squished into a permanent pucker.  The ring of fat around his neck had gained so much girth that it split into two thick collars that rippled like water whenever he ate.

Firm, shapely shoulders were blanketed under a fine quilt of pudge that hid any trace of definition Wade once had.  His arms had taken on the shape of flour sacks and the consistency of mashed potatoes, completely obscuring the muscles underneath.  The flab overflowed his elbows and encroached on his forearms, which were now as big around as his thighs used to be.  All that pudge trailed down to hands that were fast becoming useless, as his palms and fingers were too thick to grip anything tightly—just holding the handle of the cart was a challenge.

His chest continued to expand out and downwards as it formed a ring around his body from front to back.  The fat mounds flapped and wobbled beneath his tunic, rippling like water with every ponderous step he took.  The cascade of flab continued down his body to what had once been abs that made the damsels swoon, now nothing more than a pile of pudge that hung almost to his knees and stuck out so far that Wade needed to keep an eye on the road ahead to make sure nothing would cross his path.  Thick rolls had sprouted all along his middle, and they were so plentiful and deep that, when Audra gauged them while Wade slept, she could make an entire pen disappear inside them.

All of this would have been bad enough, but Wade’s lower body had reached elephantine proportions to match his tremendous upper half.  His thighs were even wider than his waist used to be—not just when he started his journey, but after his first few doses of Audra’s potion.  The pillars of lard were thick as tree trunks, rubbed together clear past his overloaded knees, and forced him to waddle by rolling one leg around the other.  They led into feet that were overgrowing his shoes, and not because they were getting longer; they were so packed full of fat that people might have thought he was wearing something even if he was barefoot.

“Sorry about that, big guy,” Audra apologized as she trotted back to Wade’s side.  “My head was just in the clouds.”

“It’s all right,” the flabby fighter huffed in between gulps of air.  “Like you said the other day, all this bulking is good for strength, not speed.”

That was another little fib that the alchemist had fed her widening warrior friend—one of many she used whenever he seemed to catch onto his rotund reality.  When he needed to stop for breathers and snacks, she reasoned that it was because he was built for quick bursts of energy, not marathons.  When his clothes were reduced to tatters, it was simply because they were well-worn.  And when he had to change out said tatters for a bed sheet fashioned into a toga?  Well, that was all the rage in Acropo, so why not try something new?

Audra watched his tomato-red cheeks puff and his blubbery body quiver with each plodding step he took, and a twinge of guilt shot through her tiny body.  As much as her desire for Wade grew with each passing day, so too did her guilt for guiding him down this road to extravagant obesity.  She had thought he would notice or say something right now and that would be enough to ease her mind, but the warrior carried on without a second thought.  The repercussions, whatever they might be, would only get worse the longer she dragged it out, but the goblin girl could not bring herself to say a word.

When the pair passed by a mile marker, Wade came to a halt and asked, “Audra, can we stop here for a break?  I could use a little bite to keep my strength up.”

“Of course,” the alchemist replied as she patted the bulbous boy’s belly.  “Go take a seat on that rock, and I’ll make you a sandwich or two.”

Wade licked his lips in anticipation and sat down on the boulder by the mile marker.  Bulking up had plenty of drawbacks, like tearing his pants in front of Audra or spending extra time bathing to make sure he was completely clean, but it did have its perks.  Case in point, he was always comfortable no matter where he sat now, though he reasoned it was because he was so tough now and not that his ass was wider than a loveseat.

While Audra had her back to him, the blue-haired boy watched with delight as she bounced on her feet and hummed a melody.  His feelings for the viridian girl had deepened over the course of the past month, growing from camaraderie to a blossoming fondness he had never experienced with other girls.  Wade would never admit that he was smitten with her, but there was no denying the way his heart skipped when she gave him a toothy grin or playfully jostled him.  When she laughed at his dumb jokes or put her chin in her hands to listen to his stories, he felt a swell of joy in his chest that he only got when he trained.

With that fondness came lustful desires as well, such as the ones that filled Wade’s head as he studied Audra’s rump sway.  Her diminutive stature gave him the perfect view down her top, though he tried not to look if he could, and her thick backside filled her pants just right.  The warrior had yet to express these feelings to her, a rarity for one who had laid with so many at St. Duncan’s, and he had to find other ways to vent them.  At first, this meant stroking his cock to fantasies before he bathed, but as it became harder for him to reach his manhood, he had taken to stifling his desires with even more food—two birds with one stone, as it were.

As their destination drew closer by the day, Wade worried that Audra might decide to part ways with him and venture on by herself or with someone that could actually discuss alchemy with her.  The thought of breaking up their party of two made his heart ache like nothing else before, and so he decided that today would be the day.  No more beating around the bush—he would ask Audra to accompany him on his adventures!

“Would you like extra mustard on your sandwiches, Wade?” asked the alchemist.

“Yes, please!” the warrior replied, shaken from his thoughts.  “And maybe a little fruit?  Oh, and a biscuit or two might be nice…”

His question could come later.  It was rude to talk while he was eating, after all.

***

After three sandwiches, five apples, four pears, and six biscuits, Wade lay back on the rock and patted his belly.  It was nowhere near full but it would be enough to carry him for a while longer; at least another two hours or so, by his reckoning.  Audra joined him and munched on a couple berries while he ate what used to be a large meal for the warrior.  He was amazed that she could get by on so little food throughout the day, and that just a handful of berries could count as a lunch for her.

When he tossed the remnants of his last pear away, the flabby fighter decided it was time to ask that question that had been plaguing him for the last few days.  He cleared his throat and asked, “Say, Audra…can you believe we’re nearly at Moonfall?”

The petite girl glanced down the road and answered, “Honestly, I can’t.  It’s been so much fun, I can’t believe it’s been almost a month since we left Riverton.”

“And when we get there, you’re going to the shopping district to sell your potions, right?” Wade asked, even though they had discussed their plans several times before.

“Sure am,” Audra hummed.  “And you’re going to suss out some quests.”

“That’s right,” the blue-haired butterball chuckled as he rubbed the back of his next.  Why was it so hard to say what he wanted?

As if reading his thoughts, his companion glanced up at him with her hazel eyes and asked, “Are you going to travel solo once you find an adventure?”

Those eyes made him melt, and Wade fumbled for the words.  “Well, I…I’ve thought about it, but that’s not…I don’t know if it would be good to be alone out there.”

Audra perked up and sidled closer to his rock as she replied, “Right?  Far better to travel with someone than to go it by yourself, I think.  You never know when you’ll need someone to have your back, tend to your wounds, or…or make potions.”

That last part was nearly inaudible, but the warrior heard it clear as day.  A deep blush crossed his chubby cheeks as he dared to imagine that Audra wanted to continue traveling with him.  He felt like a novice all over again, giddy over the first pretty girl to smile at him.  The thought gave fuel to his courage and strengthened his resolve to ask that one question.

“Audra,” Wade began, his mouth suddenly feeling dry as a desert, “would you…would you like to stay in my party?”

The alchemist’s eyes sparkled like a fine gem and she let out a gasp that was no louder than a kitten’s yawn, but her response was cut off by a booming laugh from the woods across from them.  A band of brigands emerged from the trees with blades in hand and menace in their eyes.  Audra ducked behind the boulder and Wade rose to meet them, though it took him a moment to stand up.

“Well, ain’t that just cute?” asked a weedy man with hair down to his ribs.  “A potbellied orc and a goblin setting off on an adventure!”

A ripple ran through Wade’s body when he landed on his feet, but he paid it no mind.  He clenched his fat hands into fists as best he could and glared at the approaching bandits, though the effect was dampened by how beady his eyes had become.  If the warrior was trying to be threatening, it was undercut by how plush and blubbery he had grown in the preceding weeks.

“Don’t know who you’re calling an orc, but you’d better keep walking if you know what’s good for you,” Wade warned the brigands.

The plunderers laughed among themselves at the threat, and the long-haired leader waggled his dagger at Wade and Audra.  “I’m not too concerned, butterball.  There’s six of us and two of you, and neither of you look like much of a threat.”

“We’ll see about that,” the wobbly warrior growled.  He glanced over his shoulder at his alchemist companion and whispered, “Stay behind me, Audra.”

Audra nodded and slid from behind the rock to Wade, whose vast body gave her ample cover, considering that one of his legs was wider around than she was.  The pair moved slowly to the cart, where Wade’s massive sword lay waiting, and their eyes never left the brigands.  The bandits leered at them like lions watching juicy antelopes and twirled their weapons in their hands in anticipation of what seemed to be an easy kill.

For the last few days, Wade had been keeping his sword atop Audra’s cart, as the strap that he used to hold it could no longer fit around his body.  Not that it mattered much, since he was now so strong that the sword was almost superfluous; another few days of strength potions and he could probably chop down a tree with a thought.  He thought back to a month prior, when he was in the same position of defending Audra from brigands and how easily he had dispatched those louts.  Now that he was a thousand times stronger than he had been, this bunch would be like a slight breeze.

Once he reached the sword, Wade taunted the thieves, “I might have put on a few pounds recently, but don’t let my looks deceive you—I’m a force to be reckoned with.”

“Oh?  You gonna kill us with that prop sword of yours, lardon?” the bandit leader jeered.

“When will you people ever learn?” Audra chuckled from her hiding spot.

Wade gripped the hilt of his sword as best he could and yanked it free from its restraints, only for two very unfortunate events to occur.  First, because his bloated hands could not close around the hilt all the way, the blade slipped away from him as soon as it left the cart.  Second, because of his ludicrous strength, the sword went flying from his hands and landed clear on the other side of the road.  Third and most unfortunate of all, the weapon cleaved through one of the bandits like butter, and his compatriots only noticed when his upper body slid off at the waist and fell to the ground.

“Well…that’s unfortunate,” Wade mumbled as the color drained from his cheeks.

“He killed Stampcrab!  Get the tallowcatch!” the leader barked at his remaining troops.

With bellies full of rage and vengeance, the brigands descended on Wade, who pushed Audra behind the cart to keep her safe.  The thieves surrounded him on all sides and hacked at him with their jagged blades, but the warrior was so insulated with blubber that he felt little more than a sting with each attack.  He tried to wade through the ring of bandits and get his sword, but between their numbers and his ponderous physique, he could not take so much as a single step out of line.

“Out of my way!” Wade grunted in his frustration.

He swatted at one of the bandits with a meaty hand, and his target’s head was vaporized by the blow.  The loss of another assailant would have made it easier to get free, but it also incensed the survivors into striking even harder.  Wade waddled forward as best he could, his wine barrel legs forcing themselves onward with all the strength they could muster, but it was not enough.  Within a few paces, the brigands had him surrounded again and peppered him with sharp blows all over his flabby frame.

Strong and durable though Wade might have been, Audra knew that even he had his limits and would need help soon.  She feverishly mixed together a lethal mix of chemicals to keep her warrior friend safe, only to pause when a thought came to her.  With how close the bandits were, she could not risk throwing an explosive potion, lest Wade be caught in the blast.  What he needed was something to boost his abilities even further—go beyond the limits presented by his lardy physique.  All she needed was a little more time for both her and Wade, and her concoctions would be ready.

The wobbly warrior had only managed a few paces across the road, still hopelessly far from his sword, when he heard the bandit leader shout, “Tip him like the cow he is!”

“Wha?” huffed a perplexed Wade, only to figure out what the thief meant when two others kicked him in the legs and sent him plummeting to the ground.

He hit the dirt road with a booming clap, the impact sending ripples coursing through every inch of his body.  Wade wriggled about like a slug in an effort to find purchase and get back to his feet, but his body was too ungainly and kept him pinned on his belly.  Soon, his efforts were thwarted by the thieves, two of whom held his arms while the leader straddled his back and put a knife to his throat.

“You sure gave us a scare there, butterball, but this is the end for you,” the scraggly man sneered as he yanked back on Wade’s hair.  “You cost me two mates, so I’m going to try and savor this.”

“Wade, close your eyes and take a deep breath!” Audra called out.

The warrior had no idea what his companion had in mind, but he was not about to question her.  He did as he was told and took a deep gulp of air while squeezing his eyes shut tight, all before he heard the sound of glass shattering beside him.  An acrid smell filled the air and he could hear the bandits gagging around him, though the gagging soon turned to screeches of pain.  The knife at his throat fell away and he felt his assailants loosen their grip on him as they fell about in pain, but he still kept his eyes closed under Audra’s instructions.

In all the confusion, he heard his alchemist friend run up to him and put a beaker to his lips as she whispered, “Hurry and drink this as quick as you can!”

Wade did not need to be told twice, especially since the elixir smelled like peaches and cream.  He obliged and opened his mouth to swallow the concoction down in a single gulp, and not an instant later, he felt a burning sensation build in his chest.  Grunting in confusion, he asked “Wh…what’s this?”

“A little energy booster to get you through this,” Audra explained.  “Now, open your eyes and get your sword, Wade—you’ve still got a fight to win!”

“Yes, ma’am!” Wade growled through gritted teeth.

The burning sensation spread throughout his entire body, touching each and every muscle and filling them with a vitality he had not felt in weeks.  Wade’s eyes snapped open as he put his hands on the ground and pushed himself to his feet with all the ease of someone three times smaller than him.  He spied the bandits lying around, clutching at knife wounds in their legs and sides, and Audra standing off to the side, holding a stiletto out in case any of them should attack.  An inky smoke was dissipating about them, but Wade wasted no time in putting two and two together.

Though Wade was still burdened with hundreds of pounds of blubber, he raced to his sword like a charging hippo.  Neither the burn between his lard-riddled legs nor the constant flopping of his flabby middle could stop the emboldened warrior from reaching his blade.  When he finally reached the massive sword, his bulbous belly ballooned in and out like a bullfrog’s throat, but he wasted no time in reaching out for the hilt.  A boost in energy could only get him so far though, as there was too much mass to keep this a simple task—no amount of bending could get around his pillowy pudge.

“Come on, come on,” Wade grunted as he turned this way and that in an effort to gain purchase on his sword.  No matter how he positioned himself, his body refused to cooperate and bunched up with even the slightest bend.

Finally, he settled on crouching down to pick up the blade, and it was a good thing that he had ingested the elixir when he did—he might have collapsed out of sheer exhaustion otherwise.  The warrior discovered once again that his fat fingers and hands kept him from gripping the hilt properly, but he made do by squeezing it so tight that his fingers embedded themselves into the grip.  Once he was armed again, the fattened fighter grinned triumphantly, though his grin turned to a ferocious glower when he saw the bandits going after Audra.

“Get away from her!” Wade howled like a mad wolf.

Two of the bandits turned towards the charging butterball, only to be cut down like wheat under his sword.  Wade would have continued his mad dash, but he came to a screeching halt when the bandit chief snatched Audra up and held a knife to her throat.  Though his vision filled with red, he was not prepared to risk Audra’s life by taking another step.

“Don’t you come any closer, lardo, or I’ll slice her throat from ear to ear” the wiry man jeered at Wade.  “You just toss that sword away, give me whatever loot you’ve got in that cart, and I’ll be on my merry way.  Any funny moves and I’ll carve the both of you like a turkey.”

Wade let out a snort of anger like a bull, but he could not afford to act recklessly when Audra had a knife to her throat.  Despite his immense strength, his sword felt incredibly heavy in that moment, weighed down as it was by the decision he had to make.  If he tossed his sword aside again, there was no guaranteeing he could get it back before Audra’s energy booster wore off, much less that the bandit would actually stay true to his word.  There was no way he could reach the bandit before he slit her throat though, even if he threw his sword with all his might.  He wracked his brain for a strategy but none presented itself, and he cursed himself for sleeping through those courses.

Thankfully, he did not have to make the decision.  Audra wriggled about in the bandit’s grasp and growled, “Enough with all the bandits!”

With that, the alchemist wrenched the brigand’s knife hand away from her neck with all her might and bit into his wrist.  He howled in pain and loosened his grip enough for Audra to slip away, which gave Wade the opening he needed.  The warrior’s massive sword went careening through the air, went clean through the bandit’s chest, and imbedded itself in a tree behind him.  The last thing the bandit saw before death overtook him was Audra’s foot stamping down on his face.

“That’ll teach you to bother travelers!” the petite goblin snarled as she stomped again and again, long after the bandit had passed.  “You dastard!  Cad!  Mangy mongrel!  I’ve half a mind to revive you, just so I can kill you again!”

“Audra, leave him be,” Wade huffed.  “He can’t hurt no one anymore—least of all you.”

Audra spun around with tears in her eyes before running over to Wade and latching onto his lardy thigh.  She blubbered, “I don’t care if he hurt me—he could have killed you, you big galoot, and it would have been my fault!”

The butterball bruiser reached down and patted the tiny girl on the head, holding her close as she buried her face in his makeshift toga.  Eventually, he scooped her up in his arms, where she nuzzled into his padded bicep like a pillow as he waddled over to the rock by the cart once more.  He plopped down on the rock with a grunt, ignoring how it shifted under his bulk, and set Audra down on what was left of his lap.

“Hey, if it wasn’t for you, I wouldn’t have been able to get back into the fight,” Wade assured the little alchemist as her sobbing diminished to sniffling and hiccups.  “That energy potion was just what I needed, and did you see the way I moved?  I could pass for a rogue with that kind of speed!”

Audra took a deep gulp of air to steady herself before whimpering, “But I wouldn’t have needed to give you that energy potion if my other potions hadn’t made you so…so…”

“Bulky?” suggested Wade.

When his companion nodded, the warrior replied, “I was thinking about that, actually.  I appreciate everything you’ve done for me with those elixirs, Audra, but it might be time for me to cut back.  Don’t get me wrong: I love the fact that I could lift the moon, but I’m pretty sure a turtle could beat me in a race now; it wouldn’t even need to be a monster turtle.  If I’m going to get strong, it should be the old fashioned way—no shortcuts.”

A blush crept into Wade’s cheeks as he added softly, “Plus, I didn’t want to say it, but I think I’ve put on a little too much weight from all this dirty bulking.”

Audra was at a loss for words.  Just when she was about to come clean to all her little white lies, Wade found his own way to the truth—mostly.  She bit her lip as she considered whether she should tell him everything, but she just could not bring herself to it; better to let him think what he wanted to think than to ruin what they had.  That, and it was hard to feel guilty when she was seated on legs softer than any cushion and resting her head against Wade’s flabby chest.

“Well, maybe things did go a little too far,” the alchemist hummed, the closest she would get to admitting her guilt, “but if you want to slim back down, I can help with that.  I know a couple recipes for potions that’ll help shed the pounds, but it’ll also mean cutting your strength back to what it was.”

“That won’t be a problem.  Don’t forget—I was still plenty strong when we met,” Wade boasted as a grin spread across his chubby cheeks.

The two shared a laugh for a moment, with Audra particularly enjoying the feel of Wade jiggling against her.  As the laughter died down, the petite alchemist looked into her companion’s eyes and told him, “By the way…my answer is ‘yes’.”

“Hm?” Wade hummed in puzzlement.

“Yes, I want to be in your party,” Audra explained.  “Traveling with you has been the most fun I’ve ever had since I first hit the road, and I don’t want it to end.”

She then reached up and tapped his chin, or a roll that could have been his chin, while tittering, “Besides, someone has to make sure that you stick to your diet.”

Wade’s blush returned in earnest as he rubbed the back of his neck and replied, “Well, if there’s anyone that can do it, it’ll be you.”

He took one of Audra’s tiny hands in his meaty mitt and gave it a gentle squeeze as he told her, “Audra Dranghy, welcome to my party.”

“Wade Leguerrier, it’s my pleasure,” the goblin replied with a warm grin and gray cheeks.

After they rested up from their fight and Wade collected his sword, they packed up the cart and prepared to ship off.  The warrior lifted the handle for the cart and asked, “I reckon we might be able to make it to just outside Moonfall by nightfall, don’t you?”

“I think so, just so long as we don’t take any more breaks,” Audra teased.

Wade scoffed in reply, but his belly let out a rumbling growl before he could get a word in.  He pressed in on the blubbery mass while his companion giggled, “Well, maybe another snack break, but only after another mile or three, okay?”

“Deal,” Wade replied, hoping it was the former instead of the latter.

THE END

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  • 11 months later...

HAPPY SPIRITSTIDE

Spiritstide was one of the most festive times of year in Tantris: on a practical level, it signaled the end of the harvest season; on a religious level, it was a time of remembrance; on a superstitious level, it was a night to ward off evil spirits.  Whatever the cause, folks in every corner of the kingdom celebrated in their own way, with the most common being parties that honored the autumnal season and children running through towns in search of candy and sweets.  It was a time that many looked forward to, especially the young, who could not wait to show their friends the costume they had crafted for tricks and treats.

“I remember Spiritstide at the academy,” Wade LeGuerrier remarked as he pitched his tent for the evening.  “We’d have a big feast in the hall with pumpkin stew, candied corn, and roast turkey, then we’d have a parade of costumes before going into town for sweeties.  Those were fun times.”

“I’d have loved to have seen that,” replied his companion, Audra Dranghy, from her cart/laboratory.  “I bet you looked cute in costume.”

Wade blushed and chuckled, “Well, I was never great at patchwork and all, so I’d usually do odd jobs for the tailor in exchange for a costume or just half-ass one.  I think I went out one year in my pajamas and told everyone that my costume was ‘tired’; I didn’t win the costume contest, in case you couldn’t have guessed.”

The two shared a laugh before getting back to their work—Wade preparing camp and Audra working on one of her new recipes.  They were settled outside the village of Samuin, which was preparing for its annual Spiritstide festival with food stalls and carnival games popping up day by day.  In an effort to make some money for their travels, Wade helped out with the construction and took care of a few uninvited monsters while Audra worked on candies for the forthcoming festival.  It was proving to be a lucrative time for the warrior and alchemist, though they would be glad when they could move on with their adventures.

“Wade, could I borrow you for a moment?” asked Audra in that sing-song voice of hers that always meant she had a little mischief in mind.  It was one of the many things that Wade adored about her, but he had grown leery of the tone whenever she was working.

“Of course,” the warrior answered as he finished putting the last stake in the ground.  He stood with a grunt and waddled over to his goblin companion, readjusting his trousers when he realized they had slipped a bit on his thick backside.  “What can I do for you?”

Audra gave him a toothy grin and held up a greenish, brownish candy—one of many laying on a tray.  “Would you be a dear and try my latest creation?  This might be my best one yet!”

Wade was afraid his skills as a taste tester/guinea pig would be needed again.  While he would do anything for his alchemist friend and crush, she had a tendency to go overboard, going as far back as their first meeting.  The first month traveling with her had seen him quaff strength-enhancing potions that also gave him the appetite of a giant and the girth of a queen slime, such that he looked more like a hippo than a man before Audra and he decided to cut off.  Wade lost most of his newfound strength as a result, but he was glad to be able to move more easily and fit into actual clothes again.

Since then, he had lost most of the weight, but he had put on a few new pounds since she took on the candymaker job for the festival and enlisted him as a taste tester.  Audra, being a woman of science, needed to try a recipe multiple times to make sure that she had gotten it just right, which meant Wade was eating whole batches of goodies to ensure their quality.  Of course, he was not helping his cause by coming up with make believe flaws that ensured Audra would make more of her current course.  She had just as much talent with the culinary arts as she did with alchemical variety, and the potbelly that rolled over his waistband was proof of that.

“I don’t know, Audra—I’m still pretty full from that cornbread you made earlier,” Wade replied, patting his stomach for emphasis.

The goblin girl blushed at the slight jiggle that followed and explained, “Oh, but it’s just candy, Wade.  Surely a big fellow like you has room for a little sweetie?”

“If I have any more sweeties, I think I’ll need to get new teeth,” Wade chuckled, not too far off from the truth.  When Audra looked up at him with those soft, brown eyes of hers though, his resolve melted and he acquiesced, “Fine, but just one piece, okay?”

“Oh, thank you!” the alchemist squealed with glee, hopping and sending her own curves bouncing, much to Wade’s delight.  She offered the candy to her warrior friend and asked, “Let me know if the flavors are just right—I’m going for a caramel apple.”

Damn her for being so adorable: it was that shapely body, beaming smile, and perky attitude that had Wade buckling his belt on the last notch.  One day, he would learn to say no to her, but as he popped the candy in his mouth, he knew it would not be that day.  At least his journey back up the scale had been lined with delicious foods, and this was no exception.  The apple part was crisp and sharp, the caramel was smooth and rich, and it combined into a delectable concoction on his tongue.

“Gotta hand it to you, Audra—you’ve really hit on something here,” Wade remarked as he rolled the candy around in his mouth.  “All the flavors are so strong, and I’m glad I don’t have to worry about pulling a tooth trying to eat this.  I think you’ve got a hit on your hands!”

Audra’s grin spread from ear to ear and she clapped her little hands together in delight.  “That’s marvelous, simply marvelous!  Oh, I can’t wait to share these with everyone in town; I might have just created a new sensation!  Why, I could sell this to one of the big vendors in the kingdom and probably make a killing every Spiritstide…”

As Audra went on with her fantasies of striking it rich, Wade sat down on a log by their fire ring and savored the taste of the candy, sucking on it until it was small enough to crunch up and swallow.  The longer he enjoyed it though, the more he noticed something odd about the sweet, like how the flavor only grew stronger with each passing minute.  More than that, he felt increasingly warm, so much so that he had to shuck off his jacket despite the cool autumn air around him.  In fact, he no longer felt the brisk evening air; it was downright balmy.

“And of course, I’ll split the profits 50-50 with you, and we’ll…Wade, are you all right?” asked Audra as she paused in describing her future.  “You’re looking a little green around the gills…and all over, for that matter.”

“Huh?” Wade asked in turn, unsure of what Audra meant until he glanced down and realized that his arms had turned a pale green that grew darker by the second.  “Audra, is this supposed to happen?  This isn’t some kind of trick candy, right?”

The anxiousness in her face made her answer clear.  “No!  I used standard caramel and apple extract, plus a little something from my stash to make the flavors so strong, but nothing that could do this!  Hang on, let me see if I’ve got something that can fix this.”

While Audra fished around in her cart for something to counter the curious condition, Wade paced around and tried to keep his mind off this latest transformation.  The last time he had expanded, it had been over the course of the month and he was blissfully unaware of the full extent of his gain until he got too fat to fight at full capacity.  This time, he was all too aware of the changes going on in his body, and of the two, he was not sure which was worse.  All he knew was that he felt terrible bloated, and that it was far too hot for an autumn evening.

“Feels like I’m in an oven,” the warrior grunted as he swiped an arm across his forehead.  Rather than wick away any sweat, he felt something sticky come away from his skin, and he checked his arm to find a streak of golden brown liquid.  Wade cautiously gave it a lick and simultaneously winced and hummed when he realized that he was sweating caramel sauce.

“Audra, I don’t want to alarm you, but I think it’s getting worse,” Wade told his companion, sticky sweat beading on his brow again.  “I’ll take anything you’ve got that could fix this.”

“I just need another minute, Wade,” the goblin girl replied.  She peeked her head up in between setting beakers on her cart top, only to squeak in surprise and blush.  “Um, Wade…you might want to change out of your clothes soon.”

Wade was curious as to what the alchemist meant, but when he looked down, he realized what she had meant.  His tunic was far from loose before, but at least it could cover his belly without much trouble, unless he moved around too much.  Now, he found that it was riding up his stomach even while he stood still, revealing a swath of green gut that looked less like a part of his anatomy and more like he was smuggling a melon under his shirt.  A quick poke revealed that, yes, it was still his flesh and, yes, it was growing by the minute.

“Well, this is just great,” he grumbled as he yanked his shirt off—no small feat, considering how it clung to him thanks to his caramel sweat.  “That was my ‘fat shirt’, and I don’t have anything else that’ll fit me unless we break out the toga again.”

Audra nibbled at her lip at the thought of Wade at his fattest, forced to wear a bedsheet as a toga in lieu of clothing.  Part of her was driven wild by the idea of him growing that big again, but she tried to stay in the moment and focus on the distress it was causing her companion.  She bowed her head and assured Wade, “I’m going to make this right.  Just let me figure out where I went wrong and I’ll get a cure whipped up in a jiffy.”

Wade pursed his lips and crossed his thicker arms, but there was little he could besides sulk.  He knew that Audra meant well and would never intentionally try to make him swell like a blimp—he just wished that she was not 0-2 in that category.  One of the reasons it was such a bother was that he was a warrior, which meant that he was only as good as he was fit; if he ever let his body go to **, it meant that he was no longer able to quest like he wanted to. 

The other reason, which he was too shy to share with Audra, was that he did not want her repulsed by his girth.  Ever since he started traveling with her, Wade had felt a connection to the petite alchemist that dipped into the romantic, but he could not share those feelings with her when he was the size of a wharf grub.  Audra was not like the girls he chased after at St. Duncan’s—being a few INT points higher, for starters—but surely she would prefer a man that could see his own feet and had tits smaller than hers.  No, he would keep his feelings for her inside his heart until he was back to peak shape and all his excess blubber had been carved into rock hard muscle.

If only Wade could read minds, then he would have known his worries were for naught.  While Audra did prefer her men in shape, it was not the shape that her warrior companion had in mind—she liked her men as round and soft as a dumpling.  Seeing Wade get so plump and flabby earlier that year had been a delight for the little alchemist, and she was ashamed to admit that she pleasured herself to thoughts of being embraced by the bulky boy whenever she was alone.  Each little peek at his belly jiggling or his buttocks quivering in his trousers set her ablaze, which only grew stronger when he became too big for ordinary clothes.

She knew what a burden it was to be that big, so when Wade decided to get back into shape, she wholeheartedly got behind the idea and cooked recipes that would help with the process.  Still, she was lying to herself if she said that she would not miss her big, beefy boy, especially since she never got to use his tummy for a pillow before it slimmed down.  But she remained the faithful companion and kept her desires locked up in her fantasies where they belonged.

“Let’s see...a splash less enhancer, perhaps,” Audra mumbled to herself as she perused her notes from when she made the candies initially.  “Okay, Wade, I think I’ve got it figured out now.  Give me a few minutes and—eep!”

In the few minutes it took to find the flaw in her cooking, Audra saw that Wade had grown exponentially all across his body.  It started in his face, where his cheeks were so full that he looked like an emerald chipmunk and his neck ballooned with a thick collar of fat.  This led to soft shoulders that could bear no more than a feather, rotund arms that masked his biceps with plush pillows of flab, and fatty fingers that were fast outgrowing his gloves.  His chest, which had been a sore point ever since his first gain, had grown back into twin pools of green goo that rested on the swell of his stomach like two dollops of cream.

And that belly they rested on…oh, what Audra would have given to nuzzle against it and feel it squish against her.  It was a monument to massiveness, a globe of jelly that hung well over Wade’s waist and quivered with the slightest movement.  A thick ring of fat hung over his trousers, and a second came higher up, running around to his formless back, where his muscles were blanketed under a layer of pudge.  His lower body fared little better than the top half, with a backside that tested the seams of his trousers and thighs that rubbed against each other like furtive lovers.  He was a sight to behold, but Audra had to keep herself in check and help prevent a malfunction in the making.

“Wade, you might want to shuck your trousers,” the alchemist suggested.  “I don’t know if they’re going to last much longer.”

Wade’s cheeks turned an earthy brown at the notion, and he fiddled with his fingers as he asked, “Are you sure?  I mean, it wouldn’t be very decent of me and I wouldn’t want to—”

“If you don’t take them off now, you’ll just outgrow them in a few moments,” Audra cautioned.  “Besides, you’ve got nothing I haven’t seen before—I’ve seen a pecker or two, you know.”

“Fine, fine,” the warrior groaned, secretly glad that he could rid himself of the tightening trousers.  While it was true that he was a touch embarrassed at showing his body to Audra, he wanted to keep the illusion of decency before disrobing.  Were he traveling with another man, he would have thrown his trousers off the second he began to bloat.

Once Wade managed to shimmy out of his pants—no easy task, considering how they clung to his thunderous thighs—his expansion seemed to pick up in pace.  His limbs, once taught with iron muscle, were now so thick with fat that they appeared conical and had lost most of their mobility.  He need not worry about decency, for his stomach sagged so far down to his thighs that his manhood was well covered—though Audra had been sure to grab a peek before it vanished from sight.  All his efforts to lose weight were long gone, replaced by a green girth that showed no signs of slowing any time soon.

All of this was bad enough, but the caramel sauce sweating off his body was starting to irritate Wade, and not just because he felt an urge to lick himself clean like a cat.  The longer this went on, the more he sweated; the more he sweated, the more the caramel clumped together.  By the time he could no longer stand the weight and had to sit down, great globs of caramel the size of koi were sloughing off his body.  He felt the sweat packing in his folds and rolls, making him feel like one big caramel apple; all he needed was a stick up his colossal ass and he would be set.

“Okay, I think I have a solution!” Audra announced as she raced over to Wade’s side with a beaker full of an orange formula.  “Drink this, Wade—it should help negate the enhancer in the candy.”

Wade reached out with a puffy hand and took the beaker, barely able to keep it in his grip, and tipped it to his lips.  The concoction was bitter and did not mesh well with the sweet and sour taste in his mouth, but he felt his growth slow to a crawl and then stopping all together.  His sweat dried up into a caramel shell, and he felt the cool air tickle what was left exposed by the sticky shield.  He sluggishly ran a hand over his expansive stomach—what he could reach of it—and let out a heavy sigh of relief.

“Well, that was something else,” the warrior mumbled, his voice thick like caramel.  “I don’t think that batch is ready for sale, Audra.”

“No, I don’t think so either,” the alchemist meekly replied, wringing her hands as she felt conflicting feelings over her friend’s growth all over again.  “Wade, I’m so, so sorry.  You were just trying to help, and I screwed up your diet all over again, and—”

Audra stopped in her rambling when she felt Wade pat her hands and she saw a smile spread across his lips.  He told her, “Hey, it’s okay.  I knew a sorcerer back at the academy, and he always said you can’t make a quiche without breaking a few eggs.  There’s always going to be a risk trying out new potions and recipes, and I’m always happy to help because I want you to succeed.  And I know that if anything ever goes wrong, you’ll do what you can to fix it.”

The reassurance brought warm tears to Audra’s eyes, and she wiped them away as she sheepishly giggled, “I always said you were sweet as candy.”

“Just didn’t expect it to ever be literal,” Wade chuckled in turn.  He glanced down at the expanse of his bulky body and remarked, “Well, at least I’ve got a pretty decent costume this year.”

“I’ll see if we can’t get a few extra gold pieces by winning the costume contest,” Audra snickered as she squeezed her friend’s shoulder.  “Assuming we could get a cart to roll you into town, that is.”

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  • 6 months later...

((I hope that everyone's still in the mood for fantasy, because I'm returning to this little world of mine and adding a new chapter to it!  This one's going to be different, with not only a new cast but also a primarily BBW gain.  I hope you'll follow along for the ride!))

THE TUBBY THIEF AND THE GUARD (1/3)

 

It was a truly impressive feast that spread across the table: a nye of golden-brown pheasants resting atop pillowy mounds of mashed rutabaga, thick stalks of broccoli smothered in a blanket of melted cheese, and hearty beef stew served in soda bread bowls; roast trout stuffed to bursting with buttery lobster, sweet potatoes coated in cinnamon and sea salt, and twelve-layer trifles filled with more sugar than a candy shop.  The gathered crowd eyeballed the food like starving dogs, while the help licked their chops in anticipation of the binge that was set to begin, but for Tiphany Fledermaus, it was almost enough to make her stomach turn.

She had heard rumors about the decadence in Mossholme, but they paled in comparison to the truth about the seedy fortress.  When famine and blight had broken out in Marshland, the lords and ladies abandoned their dying lands and people for the open arms and booming larders of the local baron, Jathut.  West Tantris might have been in the throes of starvation and illness, but anyone with a title to their name was welcome to Mossholme; if you were a farmer without a farm, then Providence help you, because Baron Jathut would not.

How was it that this one fort was able to thrive while the land decayed around it?  That was the million-doubloon question, and Tiphany set out to answer it.  As an ordained thief of St. Duncan’s Academy, she had a duty to uncover the truth and take whatever was granting Mossholme this boon so that it might help the afflicted.  There were plenty of theories as to what was granting such a bounty, from an overworked agrimancer to food-giving portal, but no one had been able to find the source…yet.

It was child’s play for the magna cum laude student to sneak into Mossholme by clinging to the underside of a carriage as it rode through the fort gates.  Once night came, she snuck around the grounds and inspected the weathered structure for any weaknesses that she might use to slip in.  There was little in the way of access, save for a cellar window that was just big enough for a child—or a halfling, which worked in Tiphany’s favor.  Quick and quiet as a mouse, she slipped through the portal and slunk around the cellar until she found stairs leading to the surface.

While she had been fortunate thus far, any good thief will say that the easiest part of a job is getting into a place; the hard part is not getting caught or trapped once inside.  Tiphany was eager to help, but without knowing what was creating this bounty for the inhabitants, she would need to find a way to blend in.  Masquerading as a servant was out of the question, since the staff were far more likely to keep track of who’s who than the guests.  It would be easier to hide herself as one of the bourgeois visitors, though it was still hardly foolproof, since she hardly looked like a resident of the upper crust.

Unlike many halflings, who were stout and doughy, Tiphany was spritely and petite, almost to the point that one might mistake her for being ill.  She had a homely face with a flat nose, beady eyes, and a brow that was a bit wider than she preferred, but at least she could hide the latter with her curly brown bangs.  When she smiled, it was with a crooked mouth that looked more like a sneer than a grin, and learning the ropes of combat had left her with a couple missing teeth that were replaced with pearl insets.  Her favorite features were her elfin ears, which she decorated with a number of earrings and jewels—the one bit of glamor she allowed herself.

The rest of her outfit was very basic and plain—just the way she preferred it.  Tiphany wore a simple white shirt underneath an olive vest, brown riding pants that flared out at the hip, and her feet were mostly covered by a pair of spatterdashes, though her toes and soles were left bare.  Her petite form lacked the voluptuous curves that most halfling maidens carried: what should have been a full bosom, plump belly, and childbearing hips were a flat chest, lean stomach, and narrow hips that gave her a boyish appearance.  Was she given guff by her family for not sticking to the seven meals a day diet?  Absolutely, but none of them could do what she did; in fact, how many of halflings could say that they had studied under some of the finest thieves in the world?

Through stealth and skill, she slunk through the halls of Mossholme, keeping to the shadows and nooks while searching for the items she needed.  These were found in the guest chambers, where the many nobles that Jathut entertained rested their heads after a long day of revelry.  It would be highly unlikely for her to find clothes that fit her just right, and even more suspicious if she pilfered a single wardrobe.  Thus, Tiphany plucked a dress here, a shawl there, and by the end of her hunt, she had a little bit of everything from every armoire in the fort.

She returned to the cellar and spent the entire night stitching together outfits from the various pieces she pilfered.  It was no easy task, as it was not enough for the dress to look professionally made; it had to resemble the elegant garbs that only the finest tailors crafted.  Thankfully, Tiphany’s mother was a seamstress herself, and combining that knowledge with further education at St. Duncan’s made her one of the greatest designers the world would never know.  By the end of the night, she had assembled a wardrobe fit for a princess, and she could finally begin the fun part of the job—studying the fort for its secrets.

When morning rolled around, Tiphany strutted out of the cellar in her best impression of a noble while trying to keep her disdain for the bourgeoisie from showing.  She had not made it far before she heard a deep voice call out to her, “Lost, marm?”

Standing further down the hall was a guard, who was easily the tallest man that she had ever seen, having to actually stoop to avoid bumping the ceiling.  He had a head full of shaggy hair that all but hid the top half of his face, but Tiphany could still make out enough to tell that he was young.  Though he tried to wear a regiment uniform, it was clearly too small for him and made him look like a father trying on his son’s clothing.  Likewise, an otherwise average spear looked like a toy in his hand, all of which served to make him one of the least imposing guards the young thief had ever seen.

“Oh, I’m afraid so,” Tiphany answered, putting on a ditzy giggle and twirling a lock of hair.  “This place is just far too big!  How’s a girl supposed to get around without a map?”

The big lad chuckled and replied, “Sure tis a right puzzling place.  Most folks is at brekkist now—will ye be joining, marm?”

“That would be wonderful; I am frightfully peckish,” said the thief.  “Would you do me the honor of escorting me?  I want to make everyone jealous by showing up with the handsomest soldier in the fort leading me down the hall.”

She might have been laying it on a bit thick, but Tiphany’s charms worked, as the guard blushed and rubbed the back of his neck.  “Oh gosh, yer the only one to call me ansome since me mum!  Ye just stick by Gordie, and I’ll see ye whever you want.”

Tiphany followed quickly behind Gordie, who moved slowly but took long strides thanks to his lanky legs.  They chatted on the way to the dining hall, with Tiphany learning plenty about the fort and her rustic companion while sharing plenty of lies in turn.  Gordie was a hilleck—half-giant mountain folk—who had come down from his woods to make money for his family in this time of need.  He was not the only one, as most of the fort’s new guards were locals trying to make a living while the famine raged on outside.  Of course, that was not what the galoot wanted to do with his life (that would be “acting onna stage”), but he had to take care of his own somehow.

“An’ that’s why me kin-folk stay clear o’ mines,” Gordie said, putting a cap on a rambling story.  “Right, here we are!  Lookin’ like we’s just a mite late, but there’s still aplenty to go ‘round.”

That was an understatement, as there was more food available in that room than Tiphany had ever seen before—even more than her family’s spread at Gratia Day.  There was a cauldron full of prawns and grits bubbling away over a fire, thick ribbons of bacon sticky with glaze, and cornbread soaked in butter; fruits coated in honey and chocolate, potatoes swimming in cheese, and eggs as fluffy as clouds.  If they served anything close to this at the academy, the petite thief might have attended more breakfasts, but the bounteous spread was ruined by the people consuming it.

Tiphany had always been of the opinion that the only thing separating the nobility from common folk was their lack of want, and this was proven true by the spectacle before her.  The threat of starvation had thrown etiquette out the window, and most of these dukes and duchesses ate with all the grace of a barbarian.  The floors and tables were riddled with crumbs and scraps, regal garments were stained with sauce and grease, and the repugnant sounds of sloppy chewing and slurping filled the air.  Worst of all was how so many plump bellies and thick rumps filled out their owner’s clothes to the point of bursting, which made Tiphany sick when she thought of how many people in the region were tightening their belts to fight their hunger.

“Thank you kindly, Gordie,” she told her guide.  “I hope to see you again during my stay.”

“Oh, I hopes so, Mizz Flitter...Flutter…marm,” Gordie replied, blushing red as a rose when he fumbled over Tiphany’s last name.

The thief giggled and gave the guard a pat on the knee before sashaying into the dining hall proper.  This seemed as good an opportunity to find out what was going on in the fort, as the source of this abundance had to be close by.  It was tempting to get a plate of food, especially since she had lived off jerky and hardtack for the last few days, but Tiphany kept her head down and focused on her search.  The sooner she found whatever she was looking for, the sooner she could leave this den of hedonism behind and get a good drink.

Unfortunately, despite casting her keen eye across the room, there was not a trace of magic to be found in the entire room; it was as if the food truly was all-natural, despite how impossible that seemed.  Tiphany was ready to pack it in and venture back out into the fort, only to be held back when a bejeweled hand patted her shoulder.  She traced the hand up a soft arm to a padded shoulder to a round, womanly face that was caked in makeup ostensibly to hide its wearers years (though it only served to make her look older in Tiphany’s eyes).

The matronly woman exclaimed, “Why, if it isn’t Madame Bockland!  What’s it been—seven, eight years?  Whatever it’s been, it’s been far too long.”

“I’m terribly sorry, but I think you have me mistaken for someone else,” Tiphany apologized hastily.  “Enjoy the rest of your meal!”

Her words went unheard, and the painted woman dragged Tiphany towards her table with a surprising amount of strength.  “Oh, Winnifer, you think I’d ever forget a face as lovely as yours?  I’ve had a little summer wine so far, but I’m not that **!  Come, come, join me for a spell, won’t you?”

It did not matter what Tiphany said—she was going to the table whether she wanted to or not.  Though it put a pause on her scouting, the thief went along with the woman rather than put up a fight, as that would attract even more undesirable attention.  She found herself seated at a table alongside other women of a similar age and look to her new “friend”, and Tiphany found their perfume almost negated the pleasant aromas of the food.

“Oh, Dienna, who is your friend?” asked one of the women in between bites of sausage.

“Ladies, this here is Winnifer Bockland of Palmerstone,” Dienna explained incorrectly.  “We met when my husband and I visited her lands some years back—a little after the Dark Flood, I believe—and she has one of the best gardens in the north.”

Tiphany bit her lip and dug through her encyclopedic mind for any tips on this woman she supposedly was.  If memory served, Palmerstone was a rather poor castle with nothing but weeds surrounding it and the Bocklands were a lonely couple who lost their children one after the other.  It was a sad case of mistaken identity, but perhaps she could have some fun on Madame Bockland’s behalf.

“Unfortunately, the garden isn’t what it used to be,” Tiphany fibbed as she willed tears to her eyes.  “And ever since we lost Bryant in the Duneland Battles last summer, Palmerstone has felt far too cold and empty.  I told Nichulas that I needed some time to myself, and so I came to Mossholme looking to get some peace of mind—and maybe a good meal, which is hard to find these days.”

Dienna let out a sob and pulled her new friend to her bosom in a bear hug.  “Oh, you poor, poor dear!  I heard rumors that things were poorly in your realm, but I had no idea they were so bad.  Well, don’t you worry: the Young at Heart Brigade will help you chase those woes away.  Eveline, be a dear and grab that server!”

A buxom blonde across the table tapped the arm of a serving boy and asked, “Pardon me, laddie, but could you bring a platter for our new friend?”

“Right away, ma’am,” the young man replied before glancing over at Tiphany, who was at a loss as to what to order.

After glancing around the table at what her acquaintances were having, the thief asked, “Could you bring a plate of bacon, eggs, and cornbread and a cup of cider?”

“Right away, ma’am,” the server answered as though that was all he could say.

“Excellent choice, Winnifer,” Dienna told Tiphany.  “The food is always delicious here, but the bacon is especially delectable today.”

That was as good a segue as any for the tiny thief.  She asked, “You don’t say?  When we heard that Baron Jathut was so prosperous while all this blight was going ‘round, Nichulas and I had no idea what to make of it.  I just got in last night myself, so I’m still learning my way around the place, but has he said anything about how he became so fortunate?”

Dienna glanced among her friends, who all shrugged and shook their heads.  “Can’t rightly say, my dear; Jathut has been generous in all but that.  Perhaps you can ask him when he arrives to break fast?  He’s usually here around this time.”

It was what Tiphany expected, but it was still a disappointment.  She would have given anything to leave Mossholme as soon as possible, especially to avoid having any meeting with the master of the house.  Unfortunately, she would have to bide her time before getting any answers, but at least the food would be good in the meantime.

While waiting for the server to return with her breakfast, Tiphany made small talk with the ladies at her table, if for no other reason than to add to her wells of knowledge.  Their conversation was interrupted by the metal ping of a button striking the wall, followed by a deep guffaw.

“Told you them trousers wouldn’t hold much longer, Asher,” a potbellied man laughed at his companion, a redheaded man with a rather feminine bosom.  “That’ll be fifty gold pieces, thank you!”

As Asher fished out the gold from his coin purse, Tiphany nudged Dienna and asked, “What in the king’s name are they doing?”

“Oh, it’s just a game they like to play,” Dienna explained after swallowing a mouthful of biscuit.  “You’ll find that there’s a lot of that here: seeing who can eat or drink the most, who can eat the fastest without using their hands, or, like the gentlemen over there, seeing how long a piece of clothing will last.  In fact, the girls and I have a wager going on as we try to see who can gain the least weight while we stay here.  I’m in second right now, but I think I might just take first if Milandra keeps putting away bacon like she had been all morning!”

While the women tittered amongst themselves, Tiphany balled her hands into fists and squeezed until her nails dug into her palms.  She figured that the selfish prats that holed up here were up to no good, but hearing that they used this bounty to play games and make bets made her blood boil.  This sparked a change of plans for her: when she found the source of the magic here, she would not simply stop at stealing it away; she would bring down the wrath of the gods on them.

“Would you care to join in our wager, Winnifer?” asked Dienna, who noticed that her new friend had been rather quiet for the last few minutes.

“That’s not fair!  She hasn’t even had a bite of the food here,” Eveline whined through a mouthful of biscuit.

Tiphany wished she could kick herself for what she said next, but she replied, “Oh, don’t you worry, darling: us halflings soak up weight like a sponge does water; I daresay I’ll be waddling by the end of breakfast!  By all means, count me in!”

“Splendid!  Simply splendid,” Dienna clapped, sending her soft frame jiggling.  “Oh, and here comes our boy with your food.”

Tiphany gave the server a courteous smile as he set the plate and cup in front of her, though her eyes almost bulged out of the socket when she saw just how much food was on there.  Even three people would have had trouble with the spread, but for a light eater like her, it seemed nigh impossible.  If she truly could not finish everything, she could always foist the rest onto one of the doughy dingbats she sat beside; despite their game, they did not seem to care how much they ate.  Perhaps she ought to play their game after all, seeing as she would be a surefire winner.

As the thief nibbled at her eggs, a clamor rose through the hall and she glanced over her shoulder to find the source, only to gag when she realized it was the baron himself.  Jathut was a slugite, one of the slowest and most unpleasant of insectians, and he was unsightly even by their standards.  His skin was slimy and pale, making him look like a glob of phlegm with limbs, and his body was the flabbiest of anyone in the hall.  He wore a tunic that looked almost painted on and left nothing to imagination as thick rolls jiggled like jelly with every bobbling step he took, and the kilt he wore around his lower body highlighted the lower half of his bulbous belly.

“How now?  Is everyone having a good time?” Jathut belched, his voice thick with mucus.  When he was answered with cheers, he grinned with yellowed teeth and exclaimed, “Marvelous!  Eat plenty, my friends, for you never need worry about hunger in my halls!  Let the world outside fall to ruin; Mossholme will stand triumphant above all!”

Tiphany’s cheeks turned red with anger at his uncaring words, and it took every ounce of will to not stab him as he slithered by.  At least she was not alone in her disdain, as Dienna leaned over and whispered to her, “Honestly, I don’t much care for the man; I had to wash my hands about ten times over after he kissed them in greeting.”

That remark helped ease some of Tiphany’s frustration, though she still glowered at Jathut as he took his seat at the head of the room.  She likely would have glared at him the entire time were it not for the server returning to the table and asking, “Beg pardon, miss, but will you be wanting any more?”

The thief was about to reply that she was still working on her mountain of food, only to find that her plate was empty of even the smallest crumbs.  Her eyes went wide once more, which elicited a giggle from the ladies, and she put a hand to her stomach to find there was a little bulge to it.  Had she really eaten so much without realizing it?  Was this one of the side effects of the enchanted food here?  And more than anything, why did she still feel hungry?

“Perhaps just a little more,” Tiphany answered meekly.  “Would you be so kind as to bring some of the grits and biscuits?”

“That’s the spirit, Winnie,” Dienna gleefully exclaimed.  “Looks like it was a good idea to bring you into our game after all!”

Tiphany gave a small smile but cringed underneath her façade.  How could she have let herself get so caught up in eating that she lost all track of time?  This did not bode well for her stay in the fort, especially since she had no clue as to where this food came from.  She tried to think of plans as the next part of her meal arrived, but she still ate up everything faster than she thought possible.  This was followed by another plate, and another, and another until she finally could take no more and leaned back in her seat.

“No…no more,” she huffed, her hands tenderly rubbing a belly the size of a pumpkin.  What had she gotten herself into?

Dienna smiled sweetly and placed a hand on Tiphany’s stomach as she hummed, “Looks like someone’s in trouble!  Better be careful, my dear, or else we’ll be rolling you home!”

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Guest ratetankmark

I'm not really the biggest fan of the fantasy genre but this was seriously well done and I'll have to make sure to keep an eye out for updates, I'm really interested to see how Tiphany does for herself. Great job, mate. :) 

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2 hours ago, ratetankmark said:

I'm not really the biggest fan of the fantasy genre but this was seriously well done and I'll have to make sure to keep an eye out for updates, I'm really interested to see how Tiphany does for herself. Great job, mate. :) 

Thanks for giving it a read!  I know some of the stories I post aren't for everybody, but I'm glad you enjoyed it all the same. :) 

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  • 3 weeks later...

THE TUBBY THIEF AND THE GUARD (2/3)

While Tiphany had hoped to get some sleuthing done after breakfast, she could barely breathe after her massive feast, let alone skulk around Mossholme.  All she could do was lean back on her bench and rub slow, gentle circles into her stomach to ease some of the pressure as if she was a mother to be.  She had no idea how the other women at the table could stand to keep eating, especially since they got started sooner than she did, but she was in no position to care.

“Why, Winnie, you’re positively green in the gills,” Dienna remarked after finishing a spoonful of grits.  “Been a while since you’ve eaten that well, eh?”

Tiphany stifled a belch before answering, “Indeed—that was unlike any meal I’ve ever had.  What sort of cooks does Jathut have back there to make such masterpieces?”

One of the other women replied, “Honestly, I don’t think he’s gotten anyone new since the last time Montey and I visited.  Perhaps they’ve just taken some lessons since then?  It doesn’t matter to me one way or the other, honestly, just so long as I can have my five square meals per day.”

Any other time, Tiphany might have lashed out at the flippant remark, but she was too bloated to care.  Instead, she bowed her head and softly told the group, “Well, ladies, I hope I shall see you at the next course; I think I need to get a bit of air and some elixir before then.”

“Take care, Winnie!  We’ll be saving a space for you,” Dienna replied as her new friend awkwardly sidled off the bench and waddled out of the dining hall.

For someone who was so used to being light on her feet, Tiphany was in absolute misery as she plodded along with all the grace of a prized pig.  Sweat beaded across her brow and her curly locks clung to the back of her neck as she made her way down the halls in search of somewhere private.  She had to reconvene and reevaluate her plan, lest she get sucked into the strange whirlwind that lingered in this place.  While she had no doubt that the pampered elite were perfectly happy to stuff their faces, she thought that she was better than that, yet she had somehow eaten more in one sitting than she had at her last three family meals combined.

“Peculiar,” Tiphany muttered to herself as she leaned against a wall.  “Most peculiar.”

“How’s that, mizz?” asked a thick, familiar voice from behind.

Tiphany tiredly glanced over her shoulder and spotted Gordie standing just around the corner, poking his head out like a child spying on someone.  She sighed, “It’s nothing, Gordie.  I was just thinking that I could use a little air.”

The hilleck beamed at the comment and replied, “Sure’n I know the bestest place for air in this whole fort.  Follow ol’ Gordie, mizz, and ye’ll be righter than rain.”

He then turned and marched down the hall, blissfully ignorant of how full his charge was and how slow this made her.  Perhaps he could have bounded along the length of the fort before realizing that Tiphany was long gone, but he fortunately looked over his shoulder and saw the diminutive woman lagging behind.  With a sheepish grin on his face, he returned to her side and knelt down to tell her, “Sorry, mizz…are ye feeling unner the wevver?”

“A little,” Tiphany huffed in reply.  “Perhaps you could just tell me where this spot is, Gordie?  I’d hate to take you from your patrol, after all.”

“Hrm…’fraid I hain’t much good wif direc’ins,” Gordie apologized, his cheeks pink with embarrassment.  “But never ye fear, mizz!  There’s more’n one way to skinner bear, as me marm says.  Pardon me reach ‘ere.”

Before Tiphany could ask what the guard had in mind, she found herself scooped up by a hand the size of a shovel blade and hoisted into the air.  A mousey squeak made its way past her lips as she realized that Gordie had picked her up and now carried her like she was a bride—though, given the size difference between them, it was more accurately like a babe.  Either way, she turned a hot red and slapped him on the shoulder, doing little to help with her infantile appearance.

“Gordie!  Gordie, put me down this instant,” Tiphany demanded.

“Sure I could, but this works fer us’s both,” Gordie replied with a dopey grin on his face.  “Ye needn’t worry ‘bout keeping up wif me, n’ I needn’t worry ‘bout gettin’ ye lost!”

Much as the little thief wanted to argue, it was a logical answer; she could barely walk at the moment, and she did not want to run the risk of running into a less friendly guard.  Tiphany begrudgingly accepted the ride, though she crossed her arms and pursed her lips like a child in the midst of a tantrum.

“Fine—but let’s not make a habit out of this,” she grumbled.

A little time outdoors in the garden did help her mood and bloated stomach, and it also gave Tiphany another clue as to what was going on.  The garden, grass, and trees inside the fort were faring well enough, though there were no fruit-baring trees, berry bushes, or vegetables to be found.  This helped confirm the cause of this abundance, but she still needed to find what exactly Jathut was using.  That meant avoiding Dienna and her friends and focusing solely on the task at hand; the last thing she needed was to slip into another gluttonous fog as she had that morning…

***

“This is very bad,” Tiphany muttered before hiccupping, which led to a groan as her packed stomach threatened to pop with the slightest move.

‘The best-laid schemes of halflings and flies often go awry,’ as her grandfather used to say, and never was a proverb so true.  As much as Tiphany had tried to stick to her plan, she found Mossholme to be much more difficult to prowl than she imagined.  Whenever she attempted to sneak around the fort, she found it to be more carefully guarded than she imagined, and she was forced to make her way back to the guests or her hiding spot in the cellar.  She might have attempted more subterfuge in the dead of night, but her belly was too packed at the end of the day to do anything but sleep.  This led into the biggest hurdle she faced in her job—the abundance of food.

There was something to eat around every corner: from the tables stocked with bowls of sweets and chips to the snacks for any occasion to the massive feasts that seemed to go on forever.  The entire fort was rich with aroma, and despite her best efforts to restrain herself, Tiphany found her resolve crumbling time and again.  Dienna Berliene did not help, as the woman seemed determined to track her down and force her company on the beleaguered thief—and since she had that absurd game going on with her friends, that meant Tiphany would eat far more than she ever would otherwise.  She would have snapped at the older woman by now were it not for the need to keep up appearances and that she was too bloated to think by the end of each meal.

Filling one’s stomach to maximum capacity on a regular basis would make anyone gain weight, and Tiphany was no exception despite her impressive metabolism.  Like all the women in her family, she carried her weight in her lower body, especially in the hips and rear.  She developed a firm waddle even when she was not full, and her hips swung out in such an alien fashion that she had to adjust how she walked.  All her handmade outfits needed to be readjusted to accommodate, as the balloons she was packing in her rump made them look scandalous otherwise.  These plump features—along with thick thighs that ground like teeth whenever she moved—only made her sleuthing that much harder.

Growing into a plush pear was bad enough, but the pounds did not stop below the belt.  Tiphany found that her belly developed a permanent bloat—a bubble of fat that refused to shrink no matter how much sucking in she did.  The trim on her arms was coated in a pinchable layer of pudge that hid any trace of muscle (not that she had much to begin with), and her breasts went from almost nonexistent to soft handfuls that filled her palms.  She never thought that she would gain weight, and the added stress of packing it on so quickly only made her more anxious.

“Honestly, Gordie, I’m turning into a right piglet,” the thief complained to her favorite guard as he carried her once more to the garden.  While she was initially reluctant to be hauled around, Tiphany had to admit that it beat wearing herself out.

Gordie gave a throaty chuckle in return and replied, “Hoots, marm, but ye’re no pigelit.  Why, them piggies we raised back ‘ome would put ye to right shame.”

That was small consolation for Tiphany, who felt like a lump of dough squeezed into a cocktail dress but could do nothing about it in her current condition.  She put her head against Gordie’s shoulder and heavily sighed, “Can’t believe I’ve gotten this fat in…what’s it been, three months?  Four?”

“Ah, no, marm,” the guard answered as he ran the numbers in his head.  “I reckon ye’ve only been here about four days, aye.”

“…shit.”

***

It was a truly impressive feast that spread across the table: a nye of golden-brown pheasants resting atop pillowy mounds of mashed rutabaga, thick stalks of broccoli smothered in a blanket of melted cheese, and hearty beef stew served in soda bread bowls; roast trout stuffed to bursting with buttery lobster, sweet potatoes coated in cinnamon and sea salt, and twelve-layer trifles filled with more sugar than a candy shop.  The gathered crowd eyeballed the food like starving dogs, while the help licked their chops in anticipation of the binge that was set to begin, but for Tiphany Fledermaus, it was almost enough to make her stomach turn.

“Come on then, Winnie!  Show that poncy peacock what you can do,” Dienna cheered as she rubbed her ‘friend’s’ shoulders for support.

Tiphany had no idea how she had been talked into this, but she found herself seated across from a dandy from the north in an eating contest.  Even though she had failed completely in keeping her appetite in check, she told herself that she would never get wrapped up in one of these silly games the nobles put on.  She refused to celebrate and make merry while countless people starved out in the fields, but her decision changed when she found out that Baron Jathut would be offering a prize.

The sluggish baron presided over the contest in a throne far too small for his corpulent frame, slabs of slimy blubber overlapping the arms and the legs creaking with the slightest shift.  He clapped his hands and announced to the audience, “Friends, it has been brought to my attention that I have been remiss in my duties as a host.  My advisors say, ‘Baron, your guests are grateful for sanctuary and food, but they fear you are distant.  You greet them as they arrive and at mealtimes, but that does not make you a host—it makes you a head servant.’

“Well, let it not be said that I don’t listen to suggestions.  Starting today, I will be opening my doors to whoever wins my daily eating contests!  If you manage to outeat your opponent, you are cordially invited to my chamber to dine and spend the evening with me.  After all, what better company than with the man who has weathered this horrible famine?” Jathut boasted, his grand gut quivering like pudding as he laughed.

Tiphany despised the idea, but she also knew that her pathetic attempts at investigating thus far had come up with nothing.  If she was ever going to get to the bottom of this mystery, she needed to take a chance and risk further damage to her waistline.  Thus, she tied a napkin around her neck, picked up her fork and knife, and edged forward as she waited for the command.  The dandy across from her did the same, his tongue darting across his lips in anticipation.

Jathut began the contest by lazily waving his arm and announcing, “Now, let the games begin!”

Just like that, Tiphany and her opponent tore into the massive feast as the crowd roared with cheers and jeers.  As much as Tiphany wanted to hate the food she wolfed down, the bouncy belly on her waist was proof that she enjoyed everything the baron offered.  She attacked her meal with skill, quickly slicing apart a trout and spearing several bits of food on her fork before taking a massive bite that filled her cheeks to capacity.  A low moan rumbled up from her throat as she gobbled up the fish and lobster, and her eyelids fluttered despite herself.

Across from her, the dandy was making far more of a mess than her, keeping in line with how much these elitist swine threw out their etiquette once they were alone.  He was unremarkably handsome—attractive when isolated, but easily lost in a crowd—but his finer features were blanketed in a layer of soft adipose that grew thicker by the day.  His garments were stretched tight around a pillowy chest, plush stomach, and wobbly hips, though with how much sauce splattered along the threads, he did not seem to care for looks.  Like so many others at Mossholme, he only cared about satisfying his own carnal desires, regardless of the effect it would have on him or the world at large.

There was something there for Tiphany to be furious about, but she did not focus on the plump princeling on the other end of the table.  She ate voraciously but methodically: she dissected a pheasant with all the skill of a butcher, scooped up spare cheese from the broccoli with stew-soaked bread, and made a mash out of her sweet potatoes to make them go down even easier.  While the dandy ate like a savage, quaffing his stew like a flagon of ale, the thief worked like a surgeon and whittled her way through the feast with aplomb.

When she first sat down at the table, the only thing that kept Tiphany going was the chance to get to Jathut, but she lost her focus somewhere around her third trout; she would have forgotten where she was, save for the din of the crowd.  Pleasant little coos and purrs passed her lips as she ate, her thoughts drifting back to her family and the many hearty meals she missed out on.  How could she have ever passed up delicacies like this?  Everything was better with butter, salt, and sugar, especially in such large amounts!  She could eat like this forever and a day, if it were not for her mission…what was it again?  Something to do with a salmon?

“Don’t slow down now, Winnie!  Dolphen’s catching up to you,” Dienna warned Tiphany from her seat on the sidelines.

“Whu-huh?” the thief mumbled before shaking her head and clearing her mind with a gulp of wine.  Sure enough, her rival’s feasting was catching up to her despite her head start, which propelled Tiphany to dive back in and refocus her attention.  This proved easier said than done, as her belly was packed so full that she looked like she had swallowed a cannonball whole, leaving her unable to reach her plate without considerable effort.

Thankfully, her fans were quick to lend a hand as Dienna took a bowl of trifle and placed it on Tiphany’s bloated gut.  She winked and teased, “If you can’t reach the table, just use what you’ve got!”

Tiphany forced down a belch and dug into the trifle, scooping up thick spoonfuls of custard, cookie, and fruit and shoveling them in her mouth as quick as she could.  It had taken much of the feast, but she threw her table manners to the wind as well and happily glutted herself with reckless abandon, regardless of any mess she made.  Taking this as a sign that the contest was entering its final phase, the audience bellowed and cheered on the two munching maniacs.

It was a neck and neck race to the finish, with the food diminishing bit by bit as the two contestants ate like starving dogs.  The audience was all too eager to join in the debauchery and assist their entertainment, first by passing plates to them and then cramming the meals down their gullets when both Tiphany and the dandy grew too tired to lift their arms.  Tiphany felt a tingle of humiliation in the back of her mind, but she was too ** on wine and food to care what was happening—she just wanted to keep eating.

Eventually, the food stopped coming and the thief felt her arm tugged into the air.  Her lips smacked out of pure reflex, eating through a meal that was not coming, and only when she realized she was not eating did she stir.  Tiphany blinked as if waking from a dream and rolled her eyes down to see a mess of plates and bowls—or she would have, were her vision not blocked by a massive stomach.  Even pregnant heifers could not compare to her swollen belly: so packed with morsels that it was a veritable larder; so full of wine that she resembled a cask.  It would have been a truly horrific sight, were it not for the pleasant haze that filled her head and left her smiling dopily.

“What a fantastic showing!  The lady eats like my old ma-ma,” Jathut guffawed before clapping his hands.  “Guards, will you kindly take Madam Bockland to the baths to rest?”

Before any of the able-bodied guards could take the task, Gordie stepped forward and waved his hand in the air.  “I’ll do it for ye, baron-sir—wif one ‘and, no less!”

Same as he had done since she arrived, Gordie scooped Tiphany up in one of his shovel hands and cradled her with ease, though he was even gentler this time around.  Tiphany was dimly aware of the revelry around her and the praise the nobles threw at her, but she was too tired to do anything but daintily wave.  Even though she had eaten enough for a family reunion, the bloated thief still found her thoughts drifting to her next meal—wherever and whenever that might be…

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Guest ratetankmark

Even though I'm not usually someone who's a fantasy fan, this is so fucking good and just shows how great of a writer you are that you can make me interested in stuff that I usually wouldn't care about. Great work. :D 

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