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Have you ever been scared off at any point by this fetish? FAs, feedees & feeders/resses welcome


John Smith

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Guest Costanza143

I’m unsure about how it’s affected my sexual development to be honest. I watched this stuff throughout my adolescence INSTEAD of watching “normal porn..” and I’m not trying to shame anyone into this at all. I just think maybe I didn’t balance it out. Idk. 

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Guest Costanza143

To elaborate and answer the question more specifically though; there are some things that haven’t felt right to me in my time here. I go back and forth creating various porn accounts and deleting them, mostly because of “post nut clarity” and regret. And sometimes that stuff is just a gut reaction and isn’t always correct. However certain things have weighed on my conscious and I might come off as holier than thou but believe me when I say I’m just trying to be honest. 
 

I feel gross when I jerk off to pictures of random people who aren’t part of this community. Something feels wrong about “candids” and all those threads about “girls who haven’t noticed their chub” and all that stuff. Yet at the same time, those are the hottest threads and I always find myself returning to them. Recently though, i saw someone I knew on there. It’s hard to tell but I’m 90 percent sure it was them. And they’re young. Not young enough to remove the post (after all there is a billie eilish thread) but I’m talking 18-19 years old. That’s what made me realize I need to stop looking at those threads. I’m not judging people who look at them— those threads are very arousing. Ur probably thinking, “so just leave it and let the rest of us enjoy it” and yeah, go ahead, I’m not trying to stop you. Just sharing my feelings.

 

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Guest grateful

I was spoiled early on and blessed to associate with partners who gained and were easily pleased. Two tremendous blessings I did not fully appreciate.

Being neurodiverse and undiagnosed due to resisting testing, I did not know myself well enough and became overly excited in some instances and "unrelational" in others, but the overwhelming beast in my FA world was an inability to make peace with my desire for my partner to gain and the idea that she was undergoing an unhealthy incarceration in her fattening process.

Therefore, a few instances where my best dreams were about to come true, I balked and stopped the situation.

It has taken years to accept that I never became a different person, but got to know me better and developed some social skills and better strategies with my behavior, and also came to appreciate myself more. Comfortable with myself meant comfortable with others.

To this day though, my dream girl has got to be as intense in her desire to grow as I am in my desire to see her get fat.

It is rare, especially when you add in all the other areas of life that really count in making a solid relationship.

I still imagine that it all takes place in love and a relationship because I have had that experience and do not want to settle for less.

But if you read my profile, I am all about appreciation, not need and have become less of a RL participant, unless it meets so many criteria.

This is a great thread idea and I hope it continues.....I probably should have just shared the situations I blew up! LOL

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Guest grateful
2 hours ago, Costanza143 said:

To elaborate and answer the question more specifically though; there are some things that haven’t felt right to me in my time here. I go back and forth creating various porn accounts and deleting them, mostly because of “post nut clarity” and regret. And sometimes that stuff is just a gut reaction and isn’t always correct. However certain things have weighed on my conscious and I might come off as holier than thou but believe me when I say I’m just trying to be honest. 
 

I feel gross when I jerk off to pictures of random people who aren’t part of this community. Something feels wrong about “candids” and all those threads about “girls who haven’t noticed their chub” and all that stuff. Yet at the same time, those are the hottest threads and I always find myself returning to them. Recently though, i saw someone I knew on there. It’s hard to tell but I’m 90 percent sure it was them. And they’re young. Not young enough to remove the post (after all there is a billie eilish thread) but I’m talking 18-19 years old. That’s what made me realize I need to stop looking at those threads. I’m not judging people who look at them— those threads are very arousing. Ur probably thinking, “so just leave it and let the rest of us enjoy it” and yeah, go ahead, I’m not trying to stop you. Just sharing my feelings.

 

I understand this and have had some of these behaviors. One behavior for me is I will not look at pics if I know the person passed away.

It's some sort of respect thing.

And yet two of my partners have passed away, and I miss them and I have no problem fantasizing about our lives together. Some how it's different.

One I was going to marry, and the other was my ex wife.

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Guest ssbbwlove

Not gonna lie, this fetish has put me in some weird places. Every girl I’ve ever dated, including my current 350 lb significant other, I’ve wanted them to get fatter, and I’ve only told my current significant other about that and her opinion fluctuates on that (she once told me she finds comfort in that but has also said she feels like she can’t win because I’m the first boy not revolted by her size and I still want her fatter). None of my significant others have actively tried to gain weight (my significant other is pretty care-free about what she eats and is probably gaining because of that, but it’s not intentional) so I’m always in this position of asking myself is the person I’m dating as attractive as they could be in my eyes? Am I satisfied knowing they may never be as big as I want them? And even if they do get that big, do I really want them to deal with any negative repercussions of this unhealthy lifestyle? It leaves me in a tricky spot where I pretty much know I’m the bad guy and I feel guilty but continue the cycle anyway. It sometimes makes me feel like I should try not to focus so much on my fetish, but it’s hard because so much of how I perceive attractiveness is how fat a girl is.  

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Guest You're getting fat
10 hours ago, Costanza143 said:

To elaborate and answer the question more specifically though; there are some things that haven’t felt right to me in my time here. I go back and forth creating various porn accounts and deleting them, mostly because of “post nut clarity” and regret. And sometimes that stuff is just a gut reaction and isn’t always correct. However certain things have weighed on my conscious and I might come off as holier than thou but believe me when I say I’m just trying to be honest. 
 

I feel gross when I jerk off to pictures of random people who aren’t part of this community. Something feels wrong about “candids” and all those threads about “girls who haven’t noticed their chub” and all that stuff. Yet at the same time, those are the hottest threads and I always find myself returning to them. Recently though, i saw someone I knew on there. It’s hard to tell but I’m 90 percent sure it was them. And they’re young. Not young enough to remove the post (after all there is a billie eilish thread) but I’m talking 18-19 years old. That’s what made me realize I need to stop looking at those threads. I’m not judging people who look at them— those threads are very arousing. Ur probably thinking, “so just leave it and let the rest of us enjoy it” and yeah, go ahead, I’m not trying to stop you. Just sharing my feelings.

 

I've never seen any candid pictures of any girl I know on here, and I would lie if I didn't add "unfortunately". I did however see a girl I knew in some candid topless beach pictures elsewhere.on the Internet, with the extra of a jelly belly, and I admit I wasn't uncomfortable at all. Actually it was incredibly hot, although unfortunately I've lost the pic. Maybe I'm a psychopath, I don't know. Should I feel bad because thousand of strangers jerked off to her without her knowledge? Maybe, although I admit that thought also turned me on a lot. Maybe I would feel bad if I knew someone told her about the picture, I don't know.

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  • 2 weeks later...
On 3/14/2020 at 2:51 AM, Guest Costanza143 said:

To elaborate and answer the question more specifically though; there are some things that haven’t felt right to me in my time here. I go back and forth creating various porn accounts and deleting them, mostly because of “post nut clarity” and regret. And sometimes that stuff is just a gut reaction and isn’t always correct. However certain things have weighed on my conscious and I might come off as holier than thou but believe me when I say I’m just trying to be honest. 
 

I feel gross when I jerk off to pictures of random people who aren’t part of this community. Something feels wrong about “candids” and all those threads about “girls who haven’t noticed their chub” and all that stuff. Yet at the same time, those are the hottest threads and I always find myself returning to them. Recently though, i saw someone I knew on there. It’s hard to tell but I’m 90 percent sure it was them. And they’re young. Not young enough to remove the post (after all there is a billie eilish thread) but I’m talking 18-19 years old. That’s what made me realize I need to stop looking at those threads. I’m not judging people who look at them— those threads are very arousing. Ur probably thinking, “so just leave it and let the rest of us enjoy it” and yeah, go ahead, I’m not trying to stop you. Just sharing my feelings.

I'm the same with the candid thing. I f'ing LOVE candids, often more than straight-up consensual content, and yet I know it's wrong, wrong, wrong. When I'm with a woman and a guy is leering at her I want to kill him, and all my female friends and SOs (basically all women) have stories of being followed, stalked, creeped, etc. Every woman I've discussed it with says they've been totally aware of what's going on but they pretend not to notice so they don't provoke a the guy and put themselves in danger. So figure many if not most of the women in those candid videos know they're being creeped but just hope the guy stops and goes away without it becoming a thing. Yet IRL I consider myself a feminist and most of the time act in a white knight kind of way... Thetan-level hypocrisy. 

And it has bled into RL... I went through a brief period BITD where I took my own candids and posted them on yahoo groups. It was addictive, as I found the idea of "the hunt" and then posting them turned me on more than taking them or looking at them later. This was late 90s, pre-smartphone, so they were still pics but I would linger to ensure "coverage". Finally one day I f'ed up, there was a boyfriend I didn't see and I had to dance my way out of there, telling the guy they were crazy, they misunderstood, etc. He wasn't physically threatening (I'm a pussy but actually pretty big and intimidating-looking) but I was terrified he'd call the police on me. I was married at the time and couldn't imagine the repercussions. That pretty much cured me of it — the taking, not the looking. I justify it that I don't pay for the stuff, or comment or encourage, though that's pretty weak.

 

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Never been scared off, for better or worse, but I'm certainly not proud of some of my sub-fetishes. There's a lot of sadism in my FAness and I definitely get off on the negative aspects of fat and WG — immobility, breathing and other health issues, humiliation, self-loathing, etc. I've jerked it to dead women or women who I could tell were well on the way. Also I'm a (fantasy) feeder, though from what I've seen feederism IRL is much of the time manipulation if not outright abuse.

It never fails to amuse me how over the years some women in my social circle (of all sizes) consider me a sort of hero for being an FA, like I'm some enlightened being who can see "inner beauty." Little do they know, lol. Though it seems a lot of male sexuality is rooted in sadism in general, at least judging from most of the non-FA porn I see. If anything PG-13 pin-up style stuff is way more common in the FA world than the hardcore, crying-screaming sh*t I stumble into on Pornhub.

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On 3/15/2020 at 8:41 AM, cenahater5001 said:

Facesitting. The idea of being crushed  by a girl twice your size is fun but the idea of it specifically being her ass to your face is a little too much for me

I love it but the, uh, dirty little secret with SSBBWs is that hygiene isn't always 100%.

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59 minutes ago, mal57 said:

Never been scared off, for better or worse, but I'm certainly not proud of some of my sub-fetishes. There's a lot of sadism in my FAness and I definitely get off on the negative aspects of fat and WG — immobility, breathing and other health issues, humiliation, self-loathing, etc.

I've personally never apprehended the aspects of laborious breathing, exhaustion, huffing and immobility as something of sadistic but... it's true the rest is pretty hardcore, no judgement.

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I've jerked it to dead women or women who I could tell were well on the way.

Well, I admit there happened I had some lewd oneiric fantasies about I playing to the doctor with the likes of Lolo Ferrari, Anna Nicole Smith, Marilyn Monroe and Brittany Murphy...

... what the hell, why is this always but white blonde celebrities? 

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Also I'm a (fantasy) feeder, though from what I've seen feederism IRL is much of the time manipulation if not outright abuse.

I have a basic membership there as well. I really like this website but-- gosh, I cannot count how many pedophiles, incest freaks and sociopathic-manipulative control freaks I'd either reported, trolled or kicked out of that website for the past two or three years.

They're the reason why we got so many of those A.I.-generated fake narrated stories on YouTube about women who get psychologically coerced into feederism and led astray of their social entourage by their Machiavellian partners by means of good sex, peer pressure or food-addicting drugs. 

 

Curiously, F.F. doesn't seem to hold a prety good general opinion about the likes of Curvage as well. F****ie is mostly always abbhored there as much by the Trump***ds than decent people there, but there the C-Word is freaking Voldemort: no one like to write it out loud.

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It never fails to amuse me how over the years some women in my social circle (of all sizes) consider me a sort of hero for being an FA, like I'm some enlightened being who can see "inner beauty."

I didn't expected that part. "Shallow Hal" is a thing, now?

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Little do they know, lol. Though it seems a lot of male sexuality is rooted in sadism in general, at least judging from most of the non-FA porn I see. 

Blame 'Twilight' and '50 Shades of Grey" . 

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1 minute ago, John Smith said:

Damn it. I would never try this one, then.

Well when you're in the moment with a new partner you just go for it and hope for the best. I'm sure you don't want me to go into details but I've been unpleasantly surprised by at least one midsized woman in an olifactory way. And if it's a LT relationship hopefully she's got her sh*t together, so to speak lol.

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3 minutes ago, mal57 said:

Well when you're in the moment with a new partner you just go for it and hope for the best. I'm sure you don't want me to go into details but I've been unpleasantly surprised by at least one midsized woman in an olifactory way. And if it's a LT relationship hopefully she's got her sh*t together, so to speak lol.

Fortunately to her.

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Guest grateful
7 minutes ago, mal57 said:

Never been scared off, for better or worse, but I'm certainly not proud of some of my sub-fetishes. There's a lot of sadism in my FAness and I definitely get off on the negative aspects of fat and WG — immobility, breathing and other health issues, humiliation, self-loathing, etc. I've jerked it to dead women or women who I could tell were well on the way. Also I'm a (fantasy) feeder, though from what I've seen feederism IRL is much of the time manipulation if not outright abuse.

It never fails to amuse me how over the years some women in my social circle (of all sizes) consider me a sort of hero for being an FA, like I'm some enlightened being who can see "inner beauty." Little do they know, lol. Though it seems a lot of male sexuality is rooted in sadism in general, at least judging from most of the non-FA porn I see. If anything PG-13 pin-up style stuff is way more common in the FA world than the hardcore, crying-screaming sh*t I stumble into on Pornhub.

Great points. My FA ism is so wrapped around the "couple model" that I am giving it a break and sitting out bc I know that the closer I get to someone I am going to want them to get fat for me, and currently it is an annoying behavior that can cause some personal  upset.  I have had this in RL (gaining partner in a love relationship) and part of me never wants to give it up. Sometimes I think I would be okay if it just disappeared and I could be "normal" .  LOL!

Your second point is right on: yes, I am that guy who really loves a girl for who she is and will never leave her even if she gains a ton of weight. What a guy, eh?

Third point: I come to Curvage for my mental health-but make no mistake-the dirty secret for me is:  fat can be porn. I dislike the usual fare in the sex for sale industry.

I'll take an overflowing bikini any day over a studly penetration and power f***. Also, I totally want to worship women, not push them around. (cringe)

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3 minutes ago, grateful said:

Sometimes I think I would be okay if it just disappeared and I could be "normal" .  LOL!

I have no issues with being an FA (and in fact I like that I'm a minority in that way) but yeah, often I wish I could lose the fetishy parts of it. I've never been in a relationship where I didn't constantly fear being "found out" and it certainly doesn't help foster long-term trust.

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31 minutes ago, John Smith said:

Curiously, F.F. doesn't seem to hold a prety good general opinion about the likes of Curvage as well. F****ie is mostly always abbhored there as much by the Trump***ds than decent people there, but there the C-Word is freaking Voldemort: no one like to write it out loud.

Huh, I've never been there. I avoid Feedism-dominated places as a rule now. I ordered the infamous Gina videos back in the 90s when I was pretty naive about feedism, where the whole thing was so new and magical to me I didn't really connect it with reality. I actually had a phone conversation with Gina's husband (he called me because I'd miscalculated the cost of shipping and wanted me to send him another $5 or so... lol) and I complimented him for "living the dream" with his 900 lb wife. Fast forward 10 years or so where I saw Fat Girls and Feeders and realized their whole thing was a horrorshow of manipulation, basically slow-motion murder, with a child involved and everything. Obviously what happened would have happened with or without me but it definitely put a different spin on it.

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10 minutes ago, mal57 said:

Huh, I've never been there. I avoid Feedism-dominated places as a rule now. I ordered the infamous Gina videos back in the 90s when I was pretty naive about feedism, where the whole thing was so new and magical to me I didn't really connect it with reality. I actually had a phone conversation with Gina's husband (he called me because I'd miscalculated the cost of shipping and wanted me to send him another $5 or so... lol) and I complimented him for "living the dream" with his 900 lb wife. Fast forward 10 years or so where I saw Fat Girls and Feeders and realized their whole thing was a horrorshow of manipulation, basically slow-motion murder, with a child involved and everything. Obviously what happened would have happened with or without me but it definitely put a different spin on it.

Well, some of those "extreme feedist" couples hold their goals consensually, but some others not. For some unspoken reasons, the same way F****ie had to draw out high-school tier petty drama and deeply unstable admins, than Curvage has a long story of not really hold their feet over political neutrality and that FeedeeFat is quite semi-seclusive by moments toward non-Europeans (I mean, in the citizenship-abiding sense of the word) , F.F. tend oddly to be a magnet for the dark side of feederism as well.

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Guest You're getting fat
On 3/26/2020 at 8:24 PM, mal57 said:

I've jerked it to dead women.

You mean you've jerked to pictures or videos of them after they were dead or you've jerked to actual corpses?

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Guest You're getting fat
4 minutes ago, mal57 said:

The former lol.

Well, that's not so bad. I bet many people have done it.

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10 minutes ago, You're getting fat said:

Well, that's not so bad. I bet many people have done it.

Sure, people have done all kinds of things and I would never judge them (unless there were children or abuse involved). I just wish I could draw the line at that. And I know there's Marilyn Monroe, etc but the women I'm into almost surely died because of their weight. It's not like guys into MM are turned on by big bottles of pills. Well maybe some... lol

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