Which of your current or past relationships knew about your fetish? How did they react when they found out?

[John Smith]

Well, following @WhoDat 's examplary list, here my following order of significant frequentations (not girlfriends. Never get officially commited in anything) these past ten years :

1 - My infamous ex-intimate. Our relation was awfully convoluted... she refused to consider me as either a friend or boyfriend but would simulateously tease you both filtratiously and physically, was (and still are) a pruggishly overreligious girl who will ever remind you about having made a vow of chasisty but has no qualms to party out in nightclubs every single two or three years, donning herself into tight-clad minidresses and push-up cleavages, grab you frequently by the cheek of the rear and rub her breasts avainst ypur body until you're feeling her nipples harden on as did your groin. That whole insufferable erotic tension was truly a living nightmare: I never knew whether I was just a sextoy, a reticent romantic interest she was ashamed to reckon her sentiments toward him, some part of a romantic friendship or just too much naive to realize by myself that she confuse love and desire-driven tenderness with some form of hold of power based upon some self-serving thyrst for attention and care.

Like most every single black boy, I didn't mind about girls being from the softer end of the weight spectrum, but there has a difference between not being bothered about bigger girls and not being bothered about seeing girls gaining weight. Eight and half years ago, when we used to be fifth-secondary grade students (I was seventeen years old and she was a few months shy from celebrating her nineteenth summer) , she surprized me stalking a schoolmate of our promotion, who chubbied out a lot these past few times, which angered her to the point she sucker-punched me, believing I was trying to fat-shame the latter one: but after having briefly explained I had nothing avainst gaining girls and that our classmate looked much better with that newfound chub of hers, she was taken aback by my words, flabbergasted.

I assume she'd instinctively guessed that facet of my sexual proclitivities based upon those details, because a few days later, she was eagerly confessing to me that she like to spend her entire weekend stuffing up herself with pastas until she fell in coma food, but was frustrated that the resulting bloated belly was never permanent as she had a fast metabolism. Ultimately adding that she dislike her skinny 112 (or latter 117) lbs body and (lesser) boyish appearance, that she dreamt to attain a weight of of 225-lbs or achieving full-fledged obesity with all the stereotypical characteristics who come with this, that most of her aunts - who were her sole mother figures into her life - were all either obese or ended up obese because of their commonly hereditary inclination toward gluttony and eating binge on calorie-heavy treats and other junk food and that for her, being an obese woman was the quintessential embodiment of feminine beauty and womanhood, the closest thing from looking motherlike.

As the years passed, our relation slowly evolved into first an enabler-and-encourager-sometimes-feeder/feedee-mostly-on-her-own bond. As I acted as a Voice of Temptation-like figure into that long-lasting, inconclusive foreplay, she became practically the trigger element of my self-discovery as a Trickster-like figure who consensually lure and mesmerize even the most tenously or abidingly like-minded women into this life of greedy temptation and personal freedom. I developped and honed all my skills and instincts based upon our relation alone. However, nothing was especially as perfect as a piece of fiction written by Neil Gaiman: the girl seemingly had some strong bipolar tendencies couple by a consistent love-hatred connection with her own both body self-image, erotic energy and decision-making savviness-- which will result about her devotion toward that kink being ever waxing and waning to the extremes as frequently as did our relationship status, her hobbies or own bodyweight. Someday, she would obessively made a fixation about every single newfound changing physical feature, blush when I or someone compliment her about her appareance... or brag about a trivial detail like getting stuck into the kind of dead-tight spaces only a below-average-weight person would mind about crossing by, upsizing her wardrobe or cupping out one bra size larger. Then the next day, squeal about the littiest mention about her purpoted piling-on-pounds project or having ever tried to do. Also, the fact she often hitted a plateau and knew several weight yoyo-ings didn't helped.

At het heaviest, she was about 170s, perhaps 180s pounds and dreadfully stuck between the stages of denial and self-acceptance: glancing at you with a murderous intent if ever you'd dared to remind her that she no longer obvioudly weigh 130-lbs, for thereafter bragging about her plantutous figure, massive bum sticking out far, child-bearing hips, top-heavy endowments and plump face the next five minutes (literally!) and the cycles goes on and on...

In 2017, she reverted back to 130-lbs at her great disappointment. She was complaining about how hard that was to keep the pace up when her own physique tries everything to shed off her efforts. As she wasn't in good terms with her family back then (so I was) , I propised her that we could move on together into a flat and that when we will, perhaps I could help her on a morr proactive daily basis in order she'd finallt acheve that fantasm of hers. The most risky move I did: she despised the littiest reminder about us being somewhat of a couple, save when she was making a duty to ruin my chances with every girl I met by acting out jealousively and even telling them we were actually married. But oddly, she was fancying the idea and said yes, but wanted to see results, to prove I was the man in the pair-work. I did my research, made a few efforts hete and there to find a flat ready for us, garnered a ton of information about bodybuilder training and fat dieting in the F.A. subculture (as some of y'all may perhaps remember) . When the time came, she literally freaked out. Since then, she was no longer interested about that whole kink: not just because I was fine ready to consistently stuff her up with a 9,000kcal diet and a plethora of legally accessible naturopathic hacks everyday with just barely 200$ in monthly expanses, but because having now the numbers in mind was rebutting her. She hate quantifying things and she hated to hear that fantasy becoming so close from being a concrete duty-worthy task when what make her turn on abput that was not minding about it and see what happen.

I don't know if the closure of that long-abiding kink-oriented foreplay somehow triggered the decline of our "friendship" or if she was just brooding about me not being as empathically and sentimentally controllable as before, unless that was simply the fact that she tried to make me jealous again by telling me out of nowhere she tried to reconcile with her ex-boyfriend (who annoyed her because he wanted to made out with her but she wouldn't - still because of her religious vow - so she dumped him, but only the day after I dumped her a first time) by wishing to him a happy birthday but was flustered because I threw off that the intent was geniunely foolish from her part, or just the cumulated results of many years of abuse and emotional harm in a neverending loop that fed me out but I'd merely stooped any contact with her in April. I assumed that if she was sincerely loving me, she will make a first step, trying to phone me, text me or even visit me to my workplace or home and sharing aftivities like an ordinary group of peiple who like and care for each othet does, that I was the man and the one who should head up... she never did;

Therefore, I didn't fell into her trap neither. Several months later, she wished me a happy birthday. Not enough, perhaps even a manipulative bomb, who know? You can find her pictures on Delectable Obesevations;

 

2 - One of my ex-intimates's fewer BFFs, that I used to know and woo after well before my first meetinflg with the former one.

Initially friendly, she ended up to hate me, flung away anytime we were at the same room, could ignore my presence for months, ended up getting friendly again for a while after she heard I get incredibly upset about her misbehavior toward me, somehow made it out, haven't spoke to each other again, discovered she developped a creepy fond for crystals and cheap witchcraft, haven't spoke for years again, somehow did it again and again and again, spoke about it to a French guy from the isles I used to consider as one of my best friends about that but he freaked out while hearing this and thought I was insane, casually met her once and she was quite filtratious, then the second time she just have that expression in that face when I glanced at her with a inquisitory look, which was saying out loud in the silence of appareances: "yes, we really did it." . I won't to talk about these circumstances at all... that was weird and almost abusive from her part. Was probably aware about it as I was the only one in mt ex-intimate's social circle who was absolutely not freaking out at all about her being only a few burgers from being clinically obese and getting truly stuck into any turnstile, but from which extent she did eventually knew remains a mystery to me: yet, since she is one of mt ex-intimate's closest friends, I wouldn't be surprized she's aware about everything.

Ended up recently married... didn't invited me. Apparently, both her and Number 1 hated that I used to have sentiments for the two of them, but I bet her refusal to invite me has a lot to do with the sole few things she never shared to my ex-familiar;

 

3 - She never knew and she just wanted some care and attention as well.

She was interested to an another schoolmate, but he wasn't. I just had two or three years to guess it.

Ended up lesbian and we didn't make out at all;

 

4 - Never knew neither.

Started bisexual, ended up lesbian after me and we didn't make out at all;

 

5 - Never knew.

Started lesbian, turned bisexual and we didn't make out at all;

 

6 - A college classmate who originally loathed me because she couldn't process the idea that a black man doesn't fit into her every prejudices about my people. Found me arrogant, devoid of human traits, mechanical, calculating and too much confident of my own superior intellect and well-versed way of speech-- which again, doesn't corresponds about what she envisioned about my fellows.

Ended up to nurture suddenly some sort of odd hatred-confident-desire relationship beyween each other, finding out in me somebody she could be somehow a little more herself: so much herself she immediatly confessed, so as did my ex-intime before, that she had the same fascination toward obese feminine bodies and a desire to gain weight as well.

Gained a few pounds, get chubby-shamed by our classmates and ended up to drop the project. Shortly get into bodybuilding. Nowadays, she's on the brim to look fat. You can find her pictures on Delectable Obesevations;

 

7 - An another college classmate, who somehow knew I had a preference toward bigger bodies because I dared to burst her bubble when she bragged about her part-time professional model career by telling her she hadn't what's needed if she wanted to make a careet in Dakar someday.

Originally wanted to make out with me because she never did it with a Black before (she was quite an active nyphomaniacal) , but changed up her mind after having did it with some Italian-Canadian virgin guy. Slowly loathed me, up to the point she trashtalked about me to half of the college;

 

8 - A college schoolmate. Never found out about my kink (or does she?) in the couple of years I'd tried to woo her and vice versa. Obstentiously addicted to greasy food, junk food and sugaries since well before her metabolism begun to abandon her. Initially svelte, she ended up chubby, average-weight, obese, chubby again, obese, less chubby and since then, she never get a steady weight. She was so short-tempered and rude, she make me waste a lot of time, yet I admit I started it when I first frraked out about her seeming interested to me then anytime I stated I hadn't the time to hang out because of my classes and homework... still, she was rude AF. You can found her pictures on Delectable Obesevations;

 

9 to 15 - Several other college classmates. Simultaneously... don't worry, we never make out because I didn't succeed to play out with enough sense of finesse. None of them onew about my kink;

 

16 - A college schoolmate. Never found out about my kink. Was formerly having a close friendly relationship alongside Numbers 7, 15 and the Israeli-Russian girl mentioned in Delectable Obesevations and Heaviest Girls You Dated/Wanted To Date With before to become for each other sworn enemies for some reason I did never know. The fact that most every single collegian suitor - including me - and one-night-stands they (or rather 7 for the latter case) encountered were always drawn into each of them three hadn't helped to quench their girlish rivalry and shared contempt. The fact they'd all first realized my inclinations to act out as a ladies's man toward each of them and a few other women, alike the realization they were equally flirting with the same Italian who lost his virgnity with 7 earlier in my account, had even worsened the grudge that Number 7 had against both me and every single stereotypically well-endowed male virgin/starter alike the snubbery of 15, but 16 remained at fist tolerant toward both I and the other boy's games.

She'd initially rebutted me the first time I'd tried to make a move on her, just prior to suddenly fall madly infatued to me an half-year later. The courtship game between us has progressively begun to get closer from a serious commitment toward each other because the next three months thereafter, she finally had the bravery to call me out about my womanizing habits and asked me, not straightfowardly "to choose at some point"-- e.g. to choose between her, 15, the Russian girl or the already lost case of 7. I was seeing in her eyes and suggestive manners that she was hoping I had the maturity and balls to step out of the game... but I didn't answered. She asked me to follow her up and some collegian clique to a bar, question to celebrate the conclusion of the Mayan calendar altogether, but I refused as well because my mother at that time deemed it clear that I will stay out in the cold if I didn't came back before her curfew.

 

The next day thereafter, she was dating the Italian guy. I was flabbergasted. "It's the fourth time all these girls favor him" , I thought, annoyed. My pride was affected for a while, but never enough to being tempted to screw their relation like tried the girls neither the comradeship I had with the Italian. Anyway, I get my chance and at the moment she was offering me her heart, I turned my back exactly like I did to Number 8: I was the only one to blame. Afterward, our relationship turned out into a close friendship, yet not enough close I presume. Several months later, she wanted to level up their couple into a deeper form of commitment, I mean thetr there the kind of commitment meant to make you move in flat and nonverbally expectinf to earn enough money aside to get a mortgage and a betthrotal ring here the next five-to-fifteen-years (yes... she was this much into him) . My newly acquaitance, still less mature than her, wasn't ready for this: she was the second girl he met since he lost his virginity and wasn't ready to sacrify what early manhood and an ocean of fishs had to provide for people like us just for a long-term nonwritten contract leading for an eventual marriage and flock of children.

 

So, they did eventually broke out. She had a meltdown and as I had myself many times contemplated the abyss, I feared all those red flags drove her to something of more permanently unfixable, so I DM-ed her, trying to to consolate her. Eventually, I assumed she needed a conventional act of empathetic human communication because I ended up to convince her to come at a Tim Hortons we both used to frequent, so that she make burst put a little that foggy bubble... she didn't intrepretated it that way because the last thing she texted me was a loud "WHAT?" and she closed her DM box-- or rather, she blocked me from her DM box because the green light just vanished out for ever. 

 

A couple of weeks later, a common buddy of ours, who was perfectly aware about the situation, confessed to me that she thought I was using her emotional vulnerability and need for some friendly ear to coldbloodedly rekindle the long-lost flame between us, from which I vividly glanced back that I never intented such vicious thing, that I feared for her life and that I'd simply refuse to let her down the same way people letted me down. I assume that message never attained his destination because the next few weeks thereafter, he unfollowed me on social medias just after I had the naivety to dive into some top-down marketing brand crap because two "friends" from my secondary and college days persuaded me that was the best way to quickly get rich and stripping our respective families away of the lower economic classes and its sad lot of cons. He didn't appreciated that. And 16 never comtacted me back. 

 

A couple of years later, I fell on her while working out at a gym center. She was one of the part-time coachs out there and I was geniunely shocked to realize I was no longer the musclebound one in the pair, but I was glad that it somehow helped her to overcome her inner demons and was no longer so sickly willowy, even if it meant gaining a few dozens of pounds in sheer muscle mass, losing her B-cupped bust or benchlifting twice my own weight at a daily basis... or worse, simply shun away from the room anytime I casually fell on her. Eventually, I found that the other coaches weren't appreciating my presence out there (was she this much grudgeful toward me to speak idly about my name or did they just delusionally assumed some drama?) as they were literally fooling me for weeks when I begun to take a serious step into muscle training, fat burning and cardio strenghtening, so I eventually leave the gum center and only came back but years later, when I was sure that she no longer worked around. Unfortunately, three of her former coworkers were still around and I get into some trouble again, so I decided to never make a step back into this place.

 

One or two years ago, she moved on at Toronto and closed her social media accounts. She's still however working as a part-time professional model, yet it's been a while she stopped this as well. Her compactly muscle mass had lost in tone and bulk, rendering her physique somewhat of a medium-built, more womanly, almost soft silhouette with a set of rather thick thighs and a slight bubble bum. Afterward, she has gone MIA. Perhaps I will be tempted to post something about her in Delectable Obesevations, even if she still used to look on the slimmer end of the spectrum even in those latest photoshoots;

 

17 - Oddly, I never made any move on that junior college classmate, in spite having being many times tempted in mind only. We get at a party organized by a then-friend and classmate, get drunk and when the time came for me to leave, she followed me up to the stairs to "help" me with my boots and coat. We ended up almost kissing each other, but I freaked out. AGAIN. F***... 

The next week afterward, 17 was in couple an another senior classmate and it lasted for about one year. Once they broke out, she and her twin sister progressively parted away from me. So mature, those women... 🙄 ;

 

18 - A girl from the youth center. We were mutually drawn into each since the first day, but never get anything in the past five years aside from practising on salsa dance once and press the most hardily possible her bobbly, pillowy F-cupped udders against my trunk until I get some unconfortable bulge (to her great satisfaction) . Always flirting with me when she was in couple with an another guy - who always ended up to be in friendly terms with me - as if she was expecting we end up to either knock each other like cavemen or get laid all of us three (I ended up to discover at my great disappointment the two of them were into this) : but anytime they broke up, then say adios to all those years of courthship. She eventually ended up to discover, in-between an anither break-up and an upteenth reconciliation, thag I was into this when we get enough eased to hint about our erotic kinks. Surprizingly, she was so much into this that I'd surprized her a few months later to persuade her boyfriend/my buddy on some social media (a man who started up skinny when they started up their story and is now quite hunky and beer-bellied) to dive into this fetish when she found out a video about some 700-lbs Big Cutie model I was watching a few hours prior (f*** social medias. There has no discretionary scrutiny) . 

Intially moderably thin but Petite with a D-cupped bust, she ended up podgy and having a lot of trouble to walk around her thickening thighs brishing against each other and her top-heavy frame, yet not as intensely as her BFF (who were once more but platonic girl friends) who ended up three hundreds pounds or so fatter.

In many ways, she was somewhat similar in personality traits to Number 1: up to the point thay when I approched her and her boyfriend to help me to find out a way to strip off myself from the toxic cycle of abuse and "third-wheel" romantic triangle prior the first time I dumped her, I noted a very distraught look on her face: as if she thought I was speaking about her and sought to expose out ourselves front to him.

She'd lost afterward most of her extra weight (aside from her boobs) when she ended up being converted by het friends into Veganism. Yet, in spite being a hardcore, radical advocate of a world where no one would eat meat, she was quite hypocrite as she was still stuffing her mouth anytime she get close from a fast food restaurant.

After she broke up a last time with the other guy, she quickly begun to cut any contact with me. When I'd finally get it, I unfollowed her... "out of sight, out of mind" , said an old maxim. Perhaps I will eventually share a few pictures about her, someday;

 

19 - An another girl from the youth center and one of those my buddy used to cheat on Number 18 (which I knew because he was telling me about the other girls he did frequented whilst dating or not 18) . Initially, I was the one who was making a move toward her, but so did my buddy and once whole taking modelling class, I made the counterintuitive decision to let him stood alongside her when I was already there as I was too confident of myself, the few instants has been enough to shift her attention from I to my begrudging rival. Gosh, even our already-married modelling teacher was so obviously deep into him, when the newest conservation between us has gone from casual to friendly to a confident-trustee relation to not being capable to breath at the room than I simply because we discovered that our respective ancesors somehow casually crossed the same path long ago and that I didn't ended that well for hers (they were still alive and safe, don't worry... just casually kicked out of my ancestral homeland and pissed off) .

She never found out. However, after my buddy dumped her out for an umpteenth anothet girl, she found solace into junk food, gping out from a strongly built yet Petite frame to outwardly chubby in a couple of weeks. Afterward, her gain has markedly slowed down, having attained the brim of clinical obesity but the next summer, for thereafter swiftly shaping out a little and developping a more curveous figure. She tried one of those "free relationships" between I and an another buddy of mine who was madly in love for her but get repelled into so-calledly friendzone territory for javing being the less confident of us three original suitors: suggesting to the latter one to become friends-with-benefits, which he refused after many temptations, or plainly asked me with a suggestive look to follow her up at her parents's elegant flat as they were too much busy with some family issue at the other egde of the globe, from which I'd also politely refused by matter of principles: "I won't to become an one-day stand" I thought. She fell starstruck by my outwardly affable, gentlemanry yet passively domineering and sometimes darker personality. Yet, she'd quickly developped something halfway of a couple relationship with the other rival in the course of the months.

 

Sadly, she fell into a mental breakdown as well: her parents has gone for so long and so far from home, her eldest brother has issues and I assune she never get over the break-up with my other buddy. The second man texted me about the situation, saying he feared that she envision to end with her own life. Obviously, I contacted her, persuading her to come with me and the other guy to watch a movie in theaters and all: she answered me by blocking my phone and ignoring me for the mext three years. A few months later, the other guy ignored me as well.

What the f***? that's my story with Number 16 who start over and over again! ;

 

20 - A coworker. Tried to made out and get tempted by the idea twice, but we get nearly caught. Some freak tried to made of her life a living nightmare just to annoy me and she has given her demise afterward. She quickly stopped any contact with me. Never found out about mt fetishes: too soon. However, I know she was addicted to sex and weed. I was surprized she still retained her very Petite, curveous cheerleader body from back to her secondary school days after all those munchies and junk food, yet I suspect her faster-than-average metabolism wouldn't last for very long: she ended up very slack after having done her secondary studies and envisaged to purchase a car so she would no longer had to made so many trips on foot or bus. I bet she's at least minimally on the chubby side at the moment we talk: I am too much experienced with those predictions;

 

21 - An another coworker. Simultenously. The famous Eurasian girl from Delectable Obesevations and Heaviest-blah-blah-blah . Was initially a roly-poly according her own statement back ti secondary school, ended up moderably soft and straight-figured as she blossomed into womanhood and worked out, gained a couple of pounds the first two weeks working there, somehow knew I was into bigger women when she asked me about what I was thinking about her changing appareance and replied thag I didn't mind if she gain some weight, letted herself a little go with relief, ended up to snug into her once-overgrown polo uniform after she found out while a conservarions about our dating issues that Number 1 used to be "thicc" . Initially conservative, quicjly ended up to teasing me at work, nesrly get tempted to quite a lot of things in spite telling her belief obligate her to premarital chastity, didn't missed the littiest opportunity to try to arouse me with close erotic contact and all. I didn't truoy make any move, however: I and 20 got too much trouble. A freak did found out about our leniently unprofessional relationship and tried to cause her some trouble as well. She ended up being fired, still to piss me off. 

Afterward, she stopped to talk with me. Classic. 😑😏

 

22 - Practically my latest frequentation. Was quite fatphobic, but eventually she found out the extent of my sexual preferability just by lurking around the women I'm following on one of my social media pages, my passive advocacy for Body Positivism and the fact the only women I ever shouted out for their inspiring career aside from Gal Gadot and Lupita N'yongo were Nakitende Esther and Tess Holliday. 

As Number 1 and most every single woman I ever frequented, she was as much talentuous, highly attractive and somewhat unique than eccentric, pruggish, snobbish, materialistic, tricky, abusive and self-serving. An emotionally stunted mind I never truly found a way to heal, the same way she mever found a way to change me as well. After one or two attempts to reconcile with each other, she merely unfollowed and blocked me... out of a critic of mine against the Kardashians. WHO THE UPPITY THANOSITY A 30-YEARS OLD GROWN, EDUCATED, ABOVE-AVERAGE IQ WOMAN GET THIS UPSET BECAUSE A MAN YOU DO KNOW CANNOT STAND EVERYTHING ABOUT YOUR IDOLS?!?!?! 

[WhoDat]

16 hours ago, John Smith said:

And I thought I was the one who tend to stumble onto women with in-depth issues. I am so sorry.

Sorry about what, sir? There are some (myself included!) who see it all as a grand adventure, and women, and "relationships" to be an endless, delicious puzzle.  These women were Jews, WASPS, Mexican, Muslim, the very wealthy, the dirt-poor, the educated, the dyslexic, the hippies, the conservatives. It has been a hell of a ride and I wouldn't change a thing - except for staying with some of them longer than I should have. I am flying to visit a 5'3, 460-pound cutie at the end of this month, so the adventure continues. She definitely knows about my fetish (preference) and shares it, at long last. We shall see how things pan out. But it never gets old. Some things get old but this does not. 

[allgrownup]

I discovered my preference with my wife. When she was dropping weight like crazy I ask her to hold off but that was in a "no you're not fat at all!" era, so she didn't want to.

Once she was at a weight she felt good about she started to eat like before again, but always watching not to gain too much.

I told her at one point I can help but that I don't want to be the one preventing her from eating as I prefer her with "some meat" on her. She heard that but said she never wanted to be big again.

Over a period of 2 years I've just kept complimenting her looks, started to let my hands roam over her fat deposits too, and became more and more open. Along the way she would ask several times things like "so you like big women?", "so you like fat women?", "you like fat bellies?" etc

Through persistently presenting this as both just another preference and something a lot of men prefer ("just look around you at couples") she's accepted this as just something I like. Not really a kink or fetish, more like how some prefers blondes or so.