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The Slowest Champion -Revisited-


riptoryx

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6 hours ago, Cottonsox said:

Your not a very nice person are you. Deep down

I'm not really sure how to answer that sort of rhetorical psuedo-question, or whether the question merits an answer at all, but here it goes anyway:

There's far too much subjective judgment baked into that question for my own answer to matter. Am I "nice?" "Deep down?" You tell me.

If you want to know more about what I find attractive about weight gain--the things that form the motivational underpinnings this story--then check out this old thread: LINK. If that sort of honesty and self-awareness about what turns me on makes me "not a very nice person," then yes, it's true. I am not a very nice person. At all.

If being unafraid to express here at Curvage in vivid detail and without shame the kind of things that turn me (and seemingly many others) on about weight gain and all its kinky nuances makes me "not a very nice person," then yes, it's true. I am not a very nice person. At all.

And if meeting head-on criticism and derision from those who don't or won't accept any of the above--if standing unapologetic, unbowed, and often unimpressed in face of those who perch upon an empty nest of moral superiority, branding me and my ilk unwelcome deviants best banished into the shameful shadows simply because of what we find arousing--if that makes me "not a very nice person," then yes, it's true. I am not a very nice person. At all.

So, am I "not a very nice person?" Again: you tell me. ;)

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I think if people read that last installment first, meeting a miserable, lazy, unmotivated, fat girl. Then they found out that she was once a star swimmer, fastest in the state, maybe a future Olympian. A person who had been given ample opportunities but was more interested in partying and drinking. A person for whom things had come naturally, easily. And when she had the power of choice, she took a different path then the one everyone thought she would follow. She had disappointed everyone including herself.

I think people have seen the sad, fat girl, but do they ever wonder how she was created? To see someone fall so far, might make riptoryx seem like he's being cruel to the character, but the point of the story was that she did it to herself. Does anyone doubt that high school Kara wouldn't have sneered and laughed at Jessie,  if Kara had remained thin, but Jessie, tired of dieting and struggling in the pool, gave in and was the one that became a 400 lb lazy ball of fat.

The point of the story was to have a roll reversal. I think it was extremely well written, well detailed and we'll developed. It might seem cruel, but people are cruel.

Sorry for rambling...

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37 minutes ago, y2qwert said:

I think if people read that last installment first, meeting a miserable, lazy, unmotivated, fat girl. Then they found out that she was once a star swimmer, fastest in the state, maybe a future Olympian. A person who had been given ample opportunities but was more interested in partying and drinking. A person for whom things had come naturally, easily. And when she had the power of choice, she took a different path then the one everyone thought she would follow. She had disappointed everyone including herself.

I think people have seen the sad, fat girl, but do they ever wonder how she was created? To see someone fall so far, might make riptoryx seem like he's being cruel to the character, but the point of the story was that she did it to herself. Does anyone doubt that high school Kara wouldn't have sneered and laughed at Jessie,  if Kara had remained thin, but Jessie, tired of dieting and struggling in the pool, gave in and was the one that became a 400 lb lazy ball of fat.

The point of the story was to have a roll reversal. I think it was extremely well written, well detailed and we'll developed. It might seem cruel, but people are cruel.

Sorry for rambling...

Did Kara ever laugh at Jessie? And when Jessie lost the weight, Kara was actually happy for her up until the point Jessie started trying to rub it in. Kara was at worst just annoyed she was slow, she was never a horrible person who got satisfaction out of seeing someone's life ruined. Ultimately Kara wasnt some kind of saint, she was just a decent person, and Jessie is just a bit of a monster

Her getting fat is her own fault, but her brother being god awful, her best friend being a horrible person, some random girl she never did anything to just being horrible to her, that isnt really her fault. 

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Frankly this type of ending is easier for my mind to process.  This is especially so for someone of Kara's mindset (that y2quert described so eloquently).  Everything came so easily for Kara that she never developed the skills to face hardships and to make the tough decisions.

I think it is unfair to make assumptions on someone's nature based on a piece of fiction and a short description on what pique's their interest.  I must say I find such changes, both in real life and fiction to be extremely intoxicating.  The human mind and body are truly wonders in how they change and react.

As for a "Happy" ending...  That is easy for you yourself to imagine.  Heck in a few seconds I imagined someone (amazingly like myself) meeting Kara and hitting it off)  Or perhaps she does find employment and motivation to lose some weight.  Her complexion clears up and she's dropped a few sizes.  Too bad those last 40 pounds are stubborn and seem to remain....  Oh yeah, she found a discarded lottery ticket worth $50,000 while she was rescuing a puppy.  

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2 hours ago, basil said:

 

Did Kara ever laugh at Jessie? And when Jessie lost the weight, Kara was actually happy for her up until the point Jessie started trying to rub it in. Kara was at worst just annoyed she was slow, she was never a horrible person who got satisfaction out of seeing someone's life ruined. Ultimately Kara wasnt some kind of saint, she was just a decent person, and Jessie is just a bit of a monster

Her getting fat is her own fault, but her brother being god awful, her best friend being a horrible person, some random girl she never did anything to just being horrible to her, that isnt really her fault. 

Maybe I read more into her initial behaviours than you. I took a lot of her actions as a person extremely self absorbed, and as a person who looked down on her peers. She had no trouble brushing people off that she felt were beneath her.

That's just how I read her. Maybe she wasn't as directly rude to people, but I sensed that she made it somewhat clear how she thought of others.

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3 hours ago, y2qwert said:

Maybe I read more into her initial behaviours than you. I took a lot of her actions as a person extremely self absorbed, and as a person who looked down on her peers. She had no trouble brushing people off that she felt were beneath her.

That's just how I read her. Maybe she wasn't as directly rude to people, but I sensed that she made it somewhat clear how she thought of others.

Again, she isn't a great person, she's just normalish. She was a bit arrogant, but she wasnt nasty. She never rooted against anyone, she never insulted them.

 

Jessie was literally actively cheering on the demise of someone who never did anything to her, and was actually rather nice and was encouraging her to do better.

 

I don't think being a bit too full of oneself is as bad as wanting to see someone's life ruined and being a flat out asshole to them.

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@y2qwert and @basil: As the author of all this, your discussion is so fun see!

For what it's worth--and my opinion on this doesn't carry any special infallibility--I think you both have valid points. I think @basil is describing a perspective that's probably pretty close to how Kara would see things herself--friends, family, and just about everybody turning against her the instant she's no longer a model of perfect success, cruelly abusing her in her moment of vulnerability in ways she can't possibly deserve. Conversely, @y2qwert's analysis is probably a lot closer to how Jessie, and perhaps Sarah, might see things--Kara as a former friend who succumbed to aloof, self-absorbed elitism, callously discarding her old acquaintances like outgrown childhood toys, only to find roughly a year later that she has indeed "outgrown" those old friends in another, much more literal way. Sarah, in particular, took it hard when her long-time best buddy and quasi-"big sister" figure just sorta...unceremoniously moved on. I don't think Kara understood how much she hurt Sarah during that transitional period, and her failure to even understand made it sting all the more. Unrequited love, yo...

 

@KarmaMel, I get ya! And yeah, the epilogue shows Kara at a lowest moment. A "happy ending" was never in the cards for this story (that's just not what it's all about), but It's possible things could improve for Kara. I mean, she's not just gonna lie there on the kitchen floor, naked, soaked, and sobbing forever. 

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1 hour ago, basil said:

Again, she isn't a great person, she's just normalish. She was a bit arrogant, but she wasnt nasty. She never rooted against anyone, she never insulted them.

 

Jessie was literally actively cheering on the demise of someone who never did anything to her, and was actually rather nice and was encouraging her to do better.

 

I don't think being a bit too full of oneself is as bad as wanting to see someone's life ruined and being a flat out asshole to them.

Like I said, I read more into her behaviour than you apparently did. I saw things that I maybe extrapolated to a higher degree than you did. I think there is room for interpretation here.

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Maybe it's a guilty pleasure but what really adds to the enjoyment of the conclusion and the amount of weight Kara gained is that people who have never been acquainted with the character when she was slim and energetic and popular will always presumed she has always been a portly woman.  Kara would fit into the basic fat girl stereotype of overeating, lazy and undisciplined.. 

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7 hours ago, Matt L. said:

Maybe it's a guilty pleasure but what really adds to the enjoyment of the conclusion and the amount of weight Kara gained is that people who have never been acquainted with the character when she was slim and energetic and popular will always presumed she has always been a portly woman.  Kara would fit into the basic fat girl stereotype of overeating, lazy and undisciplined.. 

She's certainly grown into that role! And simultaneously outgrown (both figuratively and literally) most trappings of her old fit and fashionable "glory days." That now pitifully-undersized high school letterman jacket she persists in wearing is probably one of the very last, lingering, incongruous outward manifestations of what she used to be.

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I'm a bit late to the party, I suppose, but damn, that was a story. I'm particularly impressed by your ability to balance plot and weight gain related phenomena. Most of the writing that I've read seems to lean a bit too hard one way or another. Mostly, it seems that these sorts of fictional pieces tend to focus almost exclusively on the fattening aspect, and ignore its less overt consequences. I've also occasionally seen stories which focus primarily on plot, where weight gain is an unusual side note. Although that's fine for another work of literature, it doesn't seem to cater to our particular brand of interest. Of course, every story has its own merits, different strokes for different folks, and all that, but personally, I'm enthralled by the realism this story intimates by balancing these factors. Kara's gain drives the plot in this story; the former does not exist independent of the latter. Neither does the plot overshadow her fattened figure (which would be hard to do, given how much she gained), but the two exist in a perfect balance.

TL;DR: I liked it.

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@clarkpalmed:  Definitely not TL;DR for me! What you liked about the balance and mutually-supportive function of plot and weight gain kinky stuff is exactly the sort of thing I was trying to accomplish.

Just like you noted, I also have the impression that a lot of the weight gain fiction to be found out there tilts heavily towards erotic indulgence while ignoring ancillary consequences, while a smaller subset leans the other way--delving into character studies while curiously seeming to lose sight of the fundamental purpose (i.e., being weight gain fetish erotica). But I think it is both possible and preferable to get plot and prurient interest working in harmony towards the same end. It doesn't have to be a trade-off. Those things can actually each improve the other, when played right. Since this was a core objective for me, it's very gratifying to know someone thinks I managed to strike that harmony well. :D

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  • 4 months later...

Hey, folks.

Just FYI, I recently updated the text of "The Slowest Champion: Revisited" at my DeviantArt account with a slightly more polished version from my hard drive. I would do the same here, but Curvage's forum structure doesn't allow that kind of fiddling around with old posts.

While most of the edits are merely corrections of typographical errors, I did make one substantive revision involving a change in the location and timing of the scene where Kara's parents bicker after her disqualification at the meet versus Cal. Maybe my inner George Lucas is up to no good, but I think the adjusted scene has better pacing and a more natural feel. 

If you are curious to see the adjusted scene, it appears in Part 6, HERE.

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3 hours ago, clarkpalmed said:

Curvage's inflexible structure is actually surprisingly helpful in this case, as I was able to compare the two versions side by side. I agree that the change in setting and timing of that scene feels more natural, but if you go back and add in Jar Jar Binks, we might have to stage an intervention!

Thanks! I figured only a couple people at most would be sufficiently interested in such a minor addition to bother examining it in that detail, but I'm delighted that you did. I actually mooched the family car ride setting from an earlier, abandoned iteration of the story in which the family was coming to visit Kara after she injured herself drunkenly falling off a porch at a frat party. It's probably for the best that set up never saw the light of day, but being able to salvage bits and pieces of prior work is a pleasant convenience.

And, now that you mention it, I'm recalling that Jar Jar is a pretty good swimmer. Hm....

 

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15 hours ago, Reddave515 said:

So how much would you say she weighed at the end of the story? 

'Bout the same as last time you asked, @Reddave515. ;)

On 2/1/2017 at 9:24 PM, riptoryx said:

 

On 2/1/2017 at 3:14 AM, Reddave515 said:

How much do you think she weighs now?

Reiterating for the record all my previous deliberate hedging regarding doling out specific numbers, by the time of the epilogue I'd say that Kara is probably well north of 300 pounds. Maybe in the neighborhood of 400. She's gotten fat.

Just to provide a little bit of additional input, I guess, upon further reflection, I might lean a bit more towards the "plus-side" of the 400-pound neighborhood. ^_^ Kara's frame tops out at 5'7" (~170 cm) on a good day, so...yeah. Bloomph.

 

 

13 hours ago, Matt L. said:

Your story is such a masterpiece I only wish there would be more or maybe if ever you have the chance write another dark weight gain story.

 

Cheers, Matt

Thanks, @Matt L.! You've always been very encouraging, and I really do appreciate that!

I anticipate that I will get around to working on new weight gain fiction in the future. For the next project, whatever it may be, I might try to aim for something a bit less ambitious in terms of overall length, but we'll see. Back when I first started working on it, I didn't expect "The Slowest Champion: Revisited" to turn out nearly so long as it did. Once begun, these creative ventures sometimes take on lives of their own.

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