So here I am again, my clothes straining to contain my huge belly. It feels so enormously bloated and hard. I just stuffed myself with more food than a person needs to eat in a day, or maybe even two. Now as the aftermath slowly sinks in I feel as if I can barely hold it up, as if I might topple over and roll back and forth on my ball gut on the floor. Part of it feels so good, part of it is so painful and disgusting. Yet still I can't help but want to touch it, just to check and make sure... is it really that big, is it really that hard? Sometimes when I'm like this I feel like it'll never go away. Maybe I'll just stay this full forever. I'll never digest this food and I'll just keep shoving more and more in there. Like some cartoon character I'll grow and grow and grow, disproportionately though. Just my stomach inching outward, more and more, pushing out between my legs till it is laying on the floor in front of me and I can no longer move. That's not going to happen. Oh I will add probably another pound or two to my already plump body, steadily growing ever fatter over time. I feel like I should ask myself why I do this. Why do I put myself through this torture? My body, my mind, my spirit... why torture myself this way, stuffing myself. I'll make some insane promise about how this will be the last time and I'll never do it again. I know better. I know that if not tomorrow the next day I'll catch a glimpse of myself in a mirror, put on an outfit that's a little too tight, or eat a little bit too much, and I'll realize that I could go further. My clothes could fit tighter, I could be just a little bit more full, a little bit more fat. And wouldn't that be amazing! It's a vicious cycle and I'm not sure how to break it. And, sometimes, honestly I'm not sure if I want to.
Curvage Model GluttonyGal's Blog
A blog by GluttonyGal in General
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